Inactive Ninjas, Samurai, Rock & Roll! [Yo Jin Bo LP]

[RK47]

As long as it's on youtube. It can be converted with

http://www.youtube-mp3.org/#v=aeRihd0Dr5I

 

[Crooked Bee]

As long as it's on youtube. It can be converted with

http://www.youtube-mp3.org/#v=aeRihd0Dr5I

Thx! Will come in handy.

I have the original song from which that little segments that repeats over and over is taken somewhere, if you want.

I'll see what other upbeat thingies I can find in my music HD thingie.

Do want! That, and other thingies too.
And thanks for the megaupload link, downloaded.

 

[Black Cat]

@ Miss Bee

I found you the entire single for download: Otsuka Ai, Sakuranbo.

As a bonus, there you have a live video of it. She doesn't have the voice to sing live, really, but she's so charismatic and is having so much fun that's pretty awesome and contagious and no one really cares she can't sing for peanuts.

I'll throw more songs with sugar overdose in the next update. :3

 

[Crooked Bee]

Thanks, sis!
It does sound kinda awful live, though.

I'll throw more songs with sugar overdose in the next update. :3

 

[Black Cat]

Chapter the eight; Things happen.
Exactly what it says on the tin.

No! Listen to me! After this, the tunnel goes on to an old castle wall, right?

Yes... but princess, how did you...

The enemy is already waiting there. It's a trap!

A trap?

I saw it in a dream. I saw Hatsuhime being killed.

... Princess. Are you in pain? Perhaps there was poison in tonight's dinner...

Um, Muneshige. I'm not Hatsuhime.

There was no need for that! *facepaw*

...

The truth is, I found this pendant in a lake. That night, Hatsuhime appeared in my room...

Huh? This must mean... you're getting back at me for my comedy routine. You still haven't forgiven me?

No, that's not it at all... I really am...

Look, you might not believe me, but I really don't come from this time. I come from a time in the very distant future.

Angry ninjas, Sayori. With swords.

And... I don't know why... This may be Hatsuhime's body, but I'm me. The mind is mine, but the body is Hatsuhime's...

Basically, I'm not Hatsuhime! Do you understand?

Yes...

Yes.

Ah, Now I see! That's the story you were planning to tell if you were captured, right? For a minute there, you even had me thinking you were someone else.

Jesus, why do I never get guys this gullible?

That's not it! Really! I'm not the princess!

Splendid, splendid. You are an amazing actress, Princess.

There was the sound of footsteps nearby.

Bring the torches! I see footprints!

Where? Where?

Princess! Hurry up and get in the tunnel.

Arrgg. Look, I wasn't lying when I told you it was a trap. Please believe me.

...Understood.

That's how it's bloody done!

At any rate, we'll forget that plan and get out of here.

Yes!

Good. Maybe Hatsuhime's destiny would be changed, now. At the very least, she wouldn't be killed at the end of that tunnel...

Princess, take this.

What? A sword? Um... why?

Make a wild guess.

This is my shortsword.

Wakizashi, actually.

For caution's sake, please accept it. If the enemy catches up to you, you must not hesitate.

Was he saying I should use this to... to hurt somebody... No! I couldn't do that!

I, I, I can't!

Princess! Where has my brave princess gone? Please, take it!

No! I don't want to!

Princess... this is not the time to debate. There are still only a few men out there. We have to go now!

Ahahah.

We'll go back to the bedroom where you were sleeping. I doubt they will expect us to return there. Then we will conceal ourselves under the floor.

R-right.

Do you understand? You must not look back. And if something happens to me, you absolutely must leave me behind and go on ahead.

What?

Well then... here we go!

Muneshige burst out of the tunnel, and desperate not to get left behind, I followed. Angry roars echoed through the night, and I saw two or three men fall before Muneshige. They had just been alive, and then...

From then on, it was like being in a trance. I wan unthinkingly through the night, hid when Muneshige told me to hide, and then ran again. It went on and on.

More than once, I thought that I couldn't go on. It was almost a miracle that we managed to get back to the room where we'd started.

The bodies were still there, and I turned my face away without thinking.

You should check to see if they did drop a rare or something. :3

Here. It's a tight space, but...

I squeezed under the floor like I'd been told to. A metallic scent filled my nose. THis was the smell of blood... the blood of the men Muneshige had killed...

Are you cold?

Um, no, I'm fi -

Please forgive me.

Aah!

D'aww!

This should be a bit better. It isn't like yo to be so selfless, Princess.

...

Muneshige had that same smell of blood about him. It was terrifying. Killing somebody, just like that...

But...

But still...

You're so warm...

If Muneshige hadn't been there... I could only guess what would have happened to me. He was protecting his princess. He was protecting me.

As I thought this, the fear grew ever more distant, and in its place I felt the strenght and warmth of the arms wrapped tightly around me.

...

Maybe I could relax. It was going to be okay... it had to be...

I began to feel drowsy. My body felt impossibly heavy... maybe it would be okay to sleep, just for a little bit...

Maybe when I woke up I'd be back in reality...

The princess! Where is the princess?

After everything I said to her... she's out at night again, playing around! I should have raised her more stricly.

Yahei strode rapidly through the castle, floorboards creaking beneath him, as he searched for the princess, but he found no sign of her, and his irritation only grew.

And Muneshige isn't here either! Hey, is there anyone here?

Vassal: Yes, here.

A messenger from the Mayuzumi clan will be coming tomorrow... where is the princess?

Vassal: Uh, begging your pardon... I regret to say... I do not know. But...

"But"? What is it? Quite beating around the bush and spit it out.

Vassal: Yesterday, somebody seems to have seen a man and a woman riding in the direction of Kitahama Castle.

Vassal: The woman apparently resembled the princess a great deal, but still, I cannot imagine that the princess actually...

When was this?

Vassal: I don't know the details, but I think it was in the afternoon, but before the evening...

...No doubt... it was the princess.

Without thinking, Yahei grabbed his head in his hands. Seeing this, the young retainer rushed anxiously over to his side.

Vassal: Are you all right, sir? Somebody, call a doctor! Where is the doctor?

Stop making such a fuss. I was just a little dizzy.

Vassal: Dizzy? That's a real problem! You could have a brain tumor, or an occupational illness! You can't overlook the first warning signs. The surgeon general says so.

If you ignore it, it could be real trouble.

Vassal This message has been brought to you by the Japanese Ministry of Health, Labor, and Welfare.

You idiot!

Conk!

Vassal: Ouch!

Send a messenger to Kitahama Castle. The princess should be there.

Vassal: Ow, ow, my poor head. That was a smackdown worthy of Mr.T, sir.

Ah, I still have it! But never mind about that! Hurry up and send a messenger!

Vassal: Yes sir.

As he watched the vassal hurry off, so quickly he stumbled a little, Yahei's face took on an expression of deep thought.

The chamberlain of Kitahara Castle was the Chief Inspector, Harumoto Ohno. It was he who was at the head of the movement to name Matsuchiyo the next heir.

Hatsuhime should have invested more on her Perception skill.

So why had the princess gone out of her way to see him... but then, the princess didn't know anything of Harumoto's political sympathies.

Oh, that wretched princess! What will she do if something happens?

Die? :3

Although Yahei continued his angry tirade, the worry was clear on his deeply lined face. Even though he was always scolding her, he had taken care of the princess since she was a girl, and could not help loving her.

He stayed up past four-thirty, nervously pacing the corridor, until he received the report he had been so anxiously awaiting.

Vassal: The messenger just returned from Kitahama Castle.

So, what did he say? Hurry up and tell me!

Vassal: Well... they insist that she's not there, and that they know nothing...

Absurd! That can't be right! The princess must be in Kitahama Castle!

Vassal: Well, you may say that, but...

Was there anything unusual happening there?

Vassal: It doesn't seem so...

Japan, where private ninja armies running around a castle with torches and ready weapons qualifies as normal.

Fine. Enough. Good work...

Vassal: Yes sir.

And then Yahei was left alone, an inscrutable expression on his face. A sense of miserable certainty descended upon him.

The princess should be in Kitahama Castle... but...

Ohno, you dog! I will not let you do as you wish!

Yahei did not know how Harumoto had gotten the princess into his stronghold,

Believe me, you don't really want to know.

but now that he had her in his hands, it seemed unlikely that he would return her unharmed.

They could not afford a moment's delay... but on the other hand, until they had proof, they could not openly make a move.

But if they could not send soldiers, how could they hope to rescue the princess?

There's no way it can be done...

Wait.

He remembered something.

That's right - the princess was saying something interesting...

Yes...

Princess...

In the next episode the sixth bishie appears and our heroes finally assemble, ready to kick some tail! Meanwhile, Sayori and Muneshige are still hiding inside their enemy's castle, and a new choice is given to us. Will they survive long enough for the others to reach them and rescue them? Do not miss the next episode of Kurokasha-tan plays girly games so you don't have to, nya! Only on RPGCodex.






@ Miss Bee:

It is a good thing I do not have a good reputation here, as otherwise I would be losing it right now.

SuG's Gimme Gimme. Oh, and 39GalaxyZ. And Rocket World. Jesus, just listen everything you can find by them, it's all awesome. And they are all so bloody cool and pretty. And Takeru's pretty hot, too.

*squeee* ,etc.

That aside,

IOSYS' Cirno's Math Class, with Touhoutards on their natural medium! My dad almost disinherited me when he discovered I was part of the same subculture as that weird asian people. From IOSYS you also have the incredibly awesome Convictor Yamaxanadu and the addictive Kero 9 Destiny.

Gagdet Trial's Theme.

Two Vocaloid songs: Dancing Samurai, which from this moment is the official theme for this Let's Play thingie, and Luca Luca Night Fever.

And then there's M.O.V.E's Dogfight. Is one of my favorite songs ever, and though it isn't really cute nor moe like the rest is pretty fast and hyper, and totally awesome. Also, it really works wonders listening to it while doing Shmups and Space Combat thingies.

I feel pretty weaboo right now.

Oh, and I almost forgot the work of art known as Less than three. :3

 

[Krraloth]

@ Krraloth

Escaflowne is a pretty weird thingie, actually, with part of it being shoujo and part of it being shounen. Given Otome Games are, basicaly, Shoujo stories you pick your way through, or at least which of the hot guys wins you, they do have many things in common.

And Van was unbearable. Jesus christ, there is a reason shounen heros are almost unheard of in shoujo. Girls want those guys, not a boring, pedestrian, badly dressed everyguy killing thingies with big robo and sword.

Yeah, I understand, uhm...how was called , Ouji-character, right?
I was talking about the VO of Hitomi, Maaya Sakamoto... ad the end of the tv season me and my woman were utterly shocked by the amount of "Van, Vaan, Van? Van! Van?! Van???".Honestly I would like to strangle her.

Anyho, good lp

 

[Crooked Bee]

Thanks for all the links, Neko-sensei! :sisfist:

IOSYS' Cirno's Math Class, with Touhoutards on their natural medium!

What the fuck did I just watch?

Convictor Yamaxanadu

Wow, that was p. awesome indeed.
All in all, browsing Youtube clicking on anything that has IOSYS in the title has been pretty funny. You can find stuff like this or that, for instance. Mindboggling.

 

[Black Cat]

@ Miss Bee

You can find stuff like this or that, for instance. Mindboggling.

IOSYS is pretty much LOL if you have a taste for joke songs, fan songs, and memes, yes. And I can believe I forgot to link Marisa Stole The Precious Thing. There you have the subtitled version, in any case.

But the IOSYS song I'm sure you will, hehehe, enjoy is this one.

Best song ever.

What the fuck did I just watch?

The tribal rituals of Touhoutards, obviously!



@ Krraloth

Yes, the Ouji, "Prince". And yes, Hitomi was unbearable. I just felt the need to vent that one about Van to someone who would understand, sorry.

And I'm glad you are enjoying the LP. ^^



Edit: @ Miss Bee

And while this one isn't by IOSYS, Bad Apple is bloody great, and the animation that goes along with it is very pretty. However, a warning: If you can recognize most of the characters you are already beyond help and must give up your soul to Gensokyo.

 

[Crooked Bee]

:SISfist:

IOSYS is pretty much LOL if you have a taste for joke songs, fan songs, and memes, yes. And I can believe I forgot to link Marisa Stole The Precious Thing. There you have the subtitled version, in any case.

Yeah, I stumbled upon that song today, too. Trance-like.

But the IOSYS song I'm sure you will, hehehe, enjoy is this one.

Haha, too true.

And while this one isn't by IOSYS, Bad Apple is bloody great, and the animation that goes along with it is very pretty. However, a warning: If you can recognize most of the characters you are already beyond help and must give up your soul to Gensokyo.

That's awesome. But no, I can't recognize the characters just by their silhouettes. (I only recognized Alice because of the doll and a couple of others.) Although I do recognize them in other, more colourful videos thanks to having spent too much time playing Labyrinth of Touhou.

EDIT. Been browsing Youtube and found... something unimaginable... something unspeakable... this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nbcIF78vzo4&hd=1 :shock:

 

[Black Cat]

Chapter the ninth; The sixth ranger.
In which Yahei finally recruits Yo, Jin, Bo, and Mon-Mon to rescue Hatsuhime, Ittosai is finally introduced, and the expedition begins. Meanwhile, Muneshige and Sayori prepare to escape the castle on their own.

At the peak of the early evening, the Mochizuki castle town was bustling.

Oh, it's so nice.

What is, Jin?

Girls at a festival... it's almost like they shine. They're so sparkly and pretty...

I feel better just watching them... It's nice.

Creepy.

There are certainly some very inexpensive things on sale here.

What? Bo! Were you even listening to what I was saying? ...So, um, what were you looking at?

Oh, sorry... You know, that "woman" over there came up to me and said "Hello, Miss. My name is James."

Another crossdresser? You sure get a lot of them. All right, all right. I recognize your incredible mojo.

Don't be jealous. A man's jealously is a shameful thing.

Shut up! Lately, everybody's been hitting on nobody but you and Yo! Even when I go to parties - by the way, have you two started going to parties without me?

You know about that?

But even if we take you with us, you never actually speak to girls, whereas we have some basic social skills.

I just don't like sitting there drinking and having detailed personal question-and-answer sessions.

You can't get around it. You just met the girl, so you have to ask her about herself.

Take notes, KKKodex!

I don't mind that part. It's just... I don't like when they ask about me.

That's not the way parties work. You have to ask about your partner, and you have to let them know about yourself. We men have to do our part to break the ice.

It just doesn't seem to work for me. Breaking the ice is my specialty, though...

With a hatchet, I bet.

Isn't it just... Oh, by the way, remember what we were talking about earlier? I've made up my mind! I know it's sudden, but what are you going to do?

Then I have no problem myself. I am already fully prepared.

Well, we're keeping the ladies waiting, so let's go meet up with them.

Hey, hey. What are you talking about?

Ah, well... we were invited to a party... separately...

Separately?

I didn't hear about this! Why didn't I hear about this?

Because we didn't tell you. ANyway, I thought you hated parties?

What?

Didn't you say that just a few seconds ago? That you're terrible at drinking with women?

No! That's completely different. I never have a chance to meet women. Why would you steal my precious chance?

Huh? But...

Yozaburo, do you understand the secret workings of my heart? I've never had a single girlfriend in my entire life... it's too painful.

That's... sad.

It's your own fault.

Yozaburo... if you don't treat your friends right... one day, stab! Right in the back. I hope it doesn't happen to you, but...

What, a threat? That's low. You're reminding me of Ittosai.

Ittosai... *sigh*

Ahh, don't mention that name! I don't want to speak ill of the dead, but he deserved what he got.

Anyway! We're talking about me! Right here! Right now! Still alive!

Do you really want to go to the party that badly?

Of course I do! Because tonight might be my chance... hahaha. My chance to use my irresistible pheromones...

And then they wonder why Jin has no fangirls. *facepaw*

Not happening.

Your... Irresistible pheromones?

For some reason, I'm the only one catching no fish. Like Forrest Gump and his shrimping boat started out. But tonight, I'll be a hurricane!

Tonight, I'll get the answer I've never gotten yet... Oh, little fishies... do you know that the shrimp have come back to the fishing hole?

What? :/

They don't know.

Well, why don't they?

I don't understand the whole shrimping boat bit. Is it some sort of delusion? A paranoid fantasy? It's no good. Frankly, it's painfully bad.

When you think of my lonely, pathetic life... That sort of pain is nothing. And who can live without delusions...

Well, Yo. Maybe Jin is right, and this is the moment he'll break through the wall of his unpopularity.

There's nothing around me but walls...

Oh, fine. So, do you want to come with us?

Really? Seriously? If you're lying to me, I'll kill you!

It's all for you, Jin. You can go in my place.

I never understood the way that would work, really. Like, hey, that guy could not come but told me to come in his stead! And then they close the door on your nose. Good one.

Yes! Tonight is the night of my irresistible syndromes!

Wasn't it your irresistible pheromones?

Tragic. He's so excited he can't think straight.

Let's go! Let's go! Let's hurry up and go!

As Jinnosuke bounded along, the sword hanging at his waist bumped against the sword of a passerby, making a clanging noise.

And as anyone who did ever play Legend of the Five Rings can tell you, that's bad news. Because the ancient japanese where high on civilization and emotional control. Yeah.

You! It's rude to touch somebody else's sword.

What? Oh, sorry.

"Sorry" doesn't cut it, you peasant.

Peasant? You don't have to get so angry just because I bumped your sword.

What? You pretend to be a samurai and you don't understand that what you did was an insult? Well, seeing as you're obviously not a real warrior...

Are you looking for a fight? Looking at you, I'd guess you're just a wandering samurai too. Do you really need to fight in the middle of the festival?

You're saying that we're equals?

It's because of people like you that real warriors have no status anymore! You don't even know how to draw you sword.

How appropriate. You fight like a cow.

It's absurd to compare us! If you want to apologize, kneel down on the ground and beg my pardon! Otherwise -

I'm not the one lowering the status of warriors! Arrogant samurai like you are the ones to blame!

There's no use arguing about it. If you are a warrior, then draw your sword!

And you only need to go clubbing a given weekend to notice few males have evolved at all since then.

Pointless.

Hey, another fight? I want in.

Quiet! He picked this fight with me! You stay out of it!

As he yelled this, Jinnosuke flew at the wandering samurai. Yozaburo and Tainojo watched, shaking their heads.

Just as they had expected, Jinnosuke's opponent was soon down on the ground.

Ahhh!

Don't worry. I used the back of my sword.

Even if Jin used the back of his sword, he's strong enough that it had to hurt. Anyway, what are you doing getting your only good clothes dirty before the party?

What? I got dirty? Shoot! There goes my plan to be a babe-magnet.

They're not too dirty - you'll be fine. Anyway, what's your babe-magnet plan this time?

You must have been quite lonely until today. I'll be praying for you that things go well.

I have a feeling things are going to go well tonight. Maybe I'll take her to some nice sushi places once we're a couple...

Um, are you...

"Honey, the fish here is just first rate. Want to see me eat two mackerel and a sardine at the same time?"

"Oh, my dearest Jinnosuke... You can eat three fish at once! Amazing."

"No, stop, don't make me blush. Want to see me put my whole fist in my mout?"

"Spectacular! Ectacular-spay, even! Man-tacular!"

"Stop. You shouldn't fall in love with me." ...The time would go by just like that.

Whomever votes him is dead meat.

Are you listening to me?

And after the sushi, we'd go to a park... I'd put my arms around her shoulders and say, "Are you hungry?"

"Huh... but we just had sushi, didn't we?"

"The truth is, I'm still hungry... should I eat you next?" ...Or something like that. Oh yeah!

By all that's holy and dear...! Whomever writes your lines should be put on death row! :/

I'm telling you to listen to me!

Oh, all right already! I was just getting to the good part, too. ...Um, who are you?

I saw you earlier when I was walking around. You seem to be quite skilled. What style of martial arts do you practice?

Huh?

What style? Well, I don't really have one... But if I had to say, I guess I belong to the "I School."

The "I School"...? Is that where you learn to be an ophthalmologist?

Yeah, well, something like that.

Ummm. The truth is, after seeing you fight, there's something I'd like to tell you.

What might that be, honored elder?

He's not talking to you, Bo. Who are you anyway? It's basic manners to tell people your name before you start talking to them.

Oh, forgive me. I am a servant of the Mochizuki clan, Yahei Hanawa.

I'm Jinnosuke Murasame. Call me Jin.

Jin!

I wasn't talking to you!

Well, you're no fun. So, what is it you want, Mr.Hanawa?

Why are you suddenly in this conversation?

You aren't the less popular character because we want you to monopolize scenes, Jin.

Would you come with me, please? This isn't something I can talk about in a place like this.

You have a request for us, don't you?

He has to. There's no other reason he'd want to talk to a couple of wandering samurai who are complete strangers.

I'm the one he's talking to here!

No, you aren't. :3

But we're comrades of destiny! Where you go, I go too!

Oohh - What's this "I go too?" Who are you calling a "comrade of destiny"? You were about to go to a party and leave me behind!

But I already told you that you could go for me. And you're bringing it up again? You're so persistent with anything involving women.

This has nothing to do with women. Fixating on petty matters is merely proof of childishness. Does baby want his bottle?

Oooh, milk! Yummy yummy! ...By which I mean, screw you! It's not like you've never had a bottle either. Anyway, if anyone is a child here, it's Yo!

Ah! Are you treating me like a child again? Unforgivable!

Shut up! You're the one who's trying to leave me out!

Hey!

We're not trying to leave you out! We're trying to get rid of you!

That's even worse! Not that it would bother me to be gotten rid of by a guy who can't even walk to the outhouse by himself if it's dark out!

Ahh! You told! I can't believe you just told them! You have just opened Pandora's box, my friend. Besides, everybody's like that after a scary movie.

That's not true.

Hey, stop that! What are you doing, fighting with your friends?

All right, I'll be warm and fuzzy. Jin, you're an excellent friend.

What? Did you just call me an eggplant friend?

...It's no good.

What's no good? If this is what it comes down to... draw your sword, Yo!

What are you doing!

Stop, Jin. Once you draw your sword, it will not rest until it tastes blood. All swords are like that.

There's no use talking!

Jinnosuke grabbed the sword hanging at his waist. At the same time, Yo dropped his empty hands to his hips. This out-of-place aura of violence made the festival-goers around them start to murmur.

Moved by idle curiosity, a certain monk pushed his way through the crowds who were watching at a distance.

Ah, just when I see a crowd has gathered... I love this sort of thing.

Maybe I should pitch in and help, hmm?

But when Monzan saw the three familiar figures, his expression shifted, and he walked smilingly forward.

Here I go, Jin!

Yaaa!

Jin screamed and rushed forward. His unsheathed blade swung in an arc, preparing to strike...

Hey, you two. Want to stop fighting, and go see a show, or --

Slash!

Thump.

Huh? What?

Huh?

Eh?

Ah...

Jin raised his sword high as if it were a fishing rod, his shoulders thrown far back, and it struck the man who had come running up behind him out of curiosity. In other words, the one who had been thumped was Monzan.

Uh... What... what... You've killed Mon-Mon...

His trembling hand dropped to the ground with a thud. It was this sound that brought the dumbfounded Yahei back to his senses.

What, what have you idiots done? Call a doctor - no a priest! Call a priest!

As Yahei panicked, Jin and Yo exchanged glances, their earlier hostility completely forgotten. Tainojo let out a long sigh, and they all spoke together.

He is a priest.

Going to die...

No...

He might actually die.

I think he's dying.

Everything has gone dark... Mon-Mon may die, but freedom lives on...

Ah, he's a lingerer.

Ah, it's no good...

No! He's dead...

It's okay, it's okay.

How can you say that...

If you pay attention to the floor, you'll notice the tatami isn't placed auspiciously. As a witch I must say it's no surprise everything has gone so wrong for this clan.

Aah, I thought I might actually die there.

They had moved from the festival-crowded town to Yahei's quarters. In a cage in the corner, a nightingale flapped its wings, startled by the laughing voices at this late hour.

Well, a normal person would have died.

Are you immortal, Mr. Kadokura?

No, no. It was my meditation and purifications that saved me. Although I suppose I have Jin's dull sword to thank as well.

Mon-Mon has some pretty weird abilities and skills, indeed.

Sorry about that.

Anyway, only strangers call me Mr. Kadokura. Feel free to call me Mon-Mon.

What? No... I couldn't...

No need to hesitate! Please call me Mon-Mon.

M-mon-Mon.

That's right! Anyway, what are you all up to?

Nobody asked you along.

No, no. The more, the better. I want to ask you to rescue someone for me.

Rescue someone? Who?

The princess of our clan.

Oh? A princess... There must be a long story behind this.

I'm sorry, but I can't discuss the details. I want you to rescue the princess from Kitahama Castle and bring her back here safely. That is all I can tell you.

I see.

At least tell us the reason for all this. We won't tell anyone.

When I say I can't tell you, I can't tell you!

Can you just whisper it in my ear? Please?

Stop it, Yo. If he can't tell us, that's fine. I'm sure the old man has his reasons.

"The old man"?

It doesn't matter whether or not we know the details. All we can do is say "yes" or "no" to the request.

Having to rescue a princess in her own country... certainly we are looking at an arcanum arcanorum.

...

Hey. Yo. Ar... ar... what is it?

Arcanum arcanorum. Something that is top secret.

Hm. Well, I have no idea about these ar-whatever plans, but I know that this is a job I've been asked to do. You don't have to come if you don't want to.

No. If we let you go alone, you'd just get killed. Besides, the Buddha does not look kindly on people who abandon those in need.

Monzan...

It's Mon-Mon!

If Jin goes, I go too.

I'll go as well. Jin by himself is unreliable.

I just told you you didn't have to come!

Besides, it'll be romantic to rescue a princess. And I'm hoping to get thanked when I save her.

A kiss of gratitude... right?

A - a kiss!

A kiss? Like when you put your lips on a woman's lips?

Yes, you put your mouths firmly together.

You mean... where you sometimes use your tongues and stuff... that sort of kiss?

Well, there are kisses like that, too...

Sooo... The kind of kiss where you build the bridge to love with your dangling strings of spit?

He's a cretin. Fact.

I don't know about "the bridge to love"... That's a little too wordy for me. But yes, that is a kiss!

Huh? Do you smell something burning?

You really did it, Mon-Mon...

Huh? What?

Aah, he's on fire now. He's so predictable.

Everybody, listen carefully! I'm going to rescue the princess alone. If you don't want to die, don't follow me!

Here it comes.

Sun, sun, sun, here it comes...

Waaaa!

...What is he doing?

It's okay. Just let him burn himself out.

In a moment, he'll be just like Sailor Moon after her final battle with Galaxia.

You mean, naked and sprouting wings?

Where did I left the brain bleach, again?

By the way, sir, what is the name of this princess?

Well... I suppose there's no way to hide it. Her name is Hatsuhime.

Princess Hatsuhime?

Hatsu? I've heard that before somewhere.

Ah! It was the girl! The girl we saved who was being chased by thugs.

Oh... You mean she really was a princess?

We will go find your unmanageable princess.

Ah, you found out. Still, however unmanageable she may be, I've taken care of her since she was a little girl, and she is my irreplaceable princess.

Yahei suddenly knelt and pressed both his hands to the tatami.

The inauspicious tatami, you may want to say.

I'm begging you! Please, save the princess.

I heard your names from the princess. I only half-believed her, but when by chance I encountered you, I saw your incredible skill for myself.

We must have been brought together by Heaven. I beg of you, please save the princess!

Oh, he's burned himself out.

Ahh... mister, when you bow down that much, you look pretty pathetic.

Please raise your head. If you're willing to go that far, we could hardly tell you no.

I'm going to go this one alone. So, I won't be needing any back-up.

What are you talking about, Jin? I'm going to rescue the lady. She was cute.

Right! As long as she's cute, even a tomboy is fine by me.

You have no standards, Mon-Mon.

Somehow, that sounds really sleazy when you say it.

Huh? That's mean. You just hurt my feelings.

Well, I was getting tired of the festival anyway. I welcome the chance to test my skills.

What are you people saying? ...Oh, whatever. We'll save your precious princess for you.

Thank you so much! I am eternally in your debt.

That's a bit over the top. Don't worry about it. We'll get something out of this ourselves, after all.

Beaming adorably, Yozaburo rubbed his thumb and forefinger together in the sing for money.

Yes. I'll pay you one hundred ryo up front, and another hundred when the job is completed successfully. Is that acceptable?

That's super-acceptable! Wow, you're generous. Just think how many capes we can buy with that, Bo!

Indeed. I have become rather tired of my own cape. It's well-made, but too thick for the summer.

What, there are "summer capes" and "winter capes"?

Of course there are!

Never underestimate the aficionados of capes!

Creepy!

So, honored elder. Would you like me to rub your shoulders for you? I've been told I'm a master of massage. Or maybe -

Or would you prefer the aromatherapy massage with your princess-saving package? It revitalizes skin damaged by the strong summer sun, for only ten ryo!

We don't need any payment up front.

Right, right, payment up front -- Wait, Jin! What did you say?

Mister, two hundred ryo is too much.

No, not at all. It's money that has been put aside for an emergency. How could I not use it now?

I see. But what would you do if we just ran off with the first hundred ryo?

Well, I have faith in you...

Once we've brought your princess back safely, we'll take the full two hundred ryo with pride. How does that sound?

If you insist.

What? What? Ohhh... So, how many enemies will there be in this castle, anyway?

Hmmm... three hundred during the daytime. But many of them go home in the night, so there shouldn't be more than a hundred then.

What? Jin... I'll need to buy a sword or something. What were you thinking, not taking the money up front?

And you can't go up against that many enemies with that blunt sword of yours, either.

Well, that's true, but... Mister, when did the princess go missing?

It was a day and a half ago. It will be two days this evening.

If we don't hurry, she won't be alive to save. We don't have the time to buy swords. We should go now.

In that case, won't you please take this? I've never drawn it in my life, but this is a fine blade that has been passed down through my family.

If it will save the princess, don't hesitate to use it.

A sword...

A sword is the soul of a warrior. Are you really prepared to lend that to somebody?

If anything were to happen to the princess, I would have no way to atone but to commit seppuku.

...

Well. If that is the case, we will certainly save her.

But it's been a long time since she went missing. We can't be sure that she's all right.

There is a man named Muneshige with the princess. Muneshige is one of the finest swordsmen in our clan, so it wouldn't be that easy for them to...

Oh, that guy.

Hm. He did seem like he was quite skilled.

If he's with her, she should be fine.

Indeed.

Well, then. Let's go while the going's good!

Oh, one more thing.

What is it?

There's another man I hired before you. Would you be willing to take him with you?

Well, as long as he doesn't get in our way, it would be good to have someone else along. Hurry up and call him in.

Right. Come here!

As Yahei spoke, the door from the room next door slid neatly open. When he saw who was standing on the other side, Jin gripped the hilt of the sword he had just been given.

Motherfucking *squeee* in a motherfucking plane.

You... you're supposed to be dead!

Ittosai!

The man casually held a frighteningly long sword. Quite unlike the furious Jin, he was smiling in supreme contentment. It was an extremely cruel smile.

Oh, yes. I forgot to say thank you for last time.

You just couldn't rest in peace, huh.

Thanks to your dull sword, I just managed to survive. But just looking at that face of yours makes my scars ache all over again.

His sexyness...!

Old man, this is...

I already know the details.

He's not the sort of man who'll just rescue the princess quietly. He kills the moment he sees any weakness, even in an ally!

So?

What did you say?

You are bodyguards who have been hired with money. Who are you to complain about who you work with? Jinnosuke, I see this is where your courage runs out.

Arrgh!

Just where are you planning to go next? A completely unfamiliar enemy castle, right? In that case...

Wouldn't it be better to have one more skilled fighter with you? Or are you just afraid of me?

Cut the crap! If you want to go that much, fine, we'll take you with us. Now hurry up and get ready!

I am already fully prepared. So, shall we?

Ittosai is so hot that he had to spend three years meditating in a buddhist monastery before becoming able to be in the presence of wood or paper without it bursting into flames. True story.

Aaah. This is no good.

Remember the saying, "yesterday's enemy is tomorrow's friend."

That's really unpersuasive.

I see we've gained another unnecessary complication. Well, I suppose it could be interesting.

Continues below...

 

[Black Cat]

Continues from above...

Around the same time that Yo, Jin, and Bo were about to leave Yahei's quarters...

Princess, Princess. Please wake up.

Uh... ummm...

Princess Hatsuhime, are you all right?

Mmm... Muneshige.

You seemed to be sleeping well. I see you were quite tired.

Ah... yes, a little. I guess this dream is still going on...

Dream?

Oh, nothing. I was praying I'd find myself back in my own room when I woke up, but...

This experience must be like a nightmare for you.

Well, that's...

I was tired of trying to explain it to him. Muneshige refused to believe that I wasn't the princess.

The space under the floor was narrow and damp. I'd managed to lie down and sleep a little, but I didn't feel any less tired. Oh, my beloved bed...

Still... I could hardly complain. I knew that Muneshige had stayed awake guarding me while I slept. I had to be strong.

You've managed to endure all this for a long time... that's not like you. No - I mean to say, you have shown your usual fortitude.

...Ah, you're speaking in a monotone.

Huh?

When you try to say something that you don't mean, you start speaking in a monotone.

It wasn't something that I didn't mean. You really did endure very well.

Um, well...

"It was because you were there," I wanted to say, but I was too embarrassed. My cheeks felt hot. Was I blushing? I was such an idiot. But... still...

What is it?

Um... it was because you were there, Muneshige. I could never have gotten through that by myself.

You flatter me, my lady.

Muneshige was smiling sweetly. I knew my face was turning bright red.

Princess? Do you have a fever?

N-no! But, anyway... It looks like nobody from the castle is coming to save us.

Well...

No, I am certain they will come!

You're right. I'm sorry. I was being faint-hearted...

That's hardly surprising. It's already been two days.

Yes...

That was right - all of this had only taken two days. I felt like a week had passed... no, a month.

Perhaps I had lost my sense of time, hiding in this dark place under the floor...

During these two days, Muneshige had brought us food and water. Listening carefully to make sure that no one was around, he went up above to find these basic necessities.

I stayed under the floor when he did, all alone... It was truly terrifying. I had to bite back sobs again and again. It might have been pathetic, but I couldn't help it - I was scared.

If Muneshige was slow in returning, I couldn't help but wonder what would happen if he never came back... Worry gnawed at me as I thought these things. I knew any movement would be like ringing an alarm bell.

I had been told to stay perfectly still, but I couldn't bear being there, and I tried to get out from under the floor time and again.

Only unbelievable luck had kept me safe. Perhaps God was watching out for me... God, and Muneshige.

Harumoto Ohno is a careful man, so we have to be cautious, but as time passes, his men will start to relax their guard.

Yes... Maybe they've already given up.

We can't be sure of that, but still... Considering our physical state, I think we have to try to escape Kitahama Castle soon.

You mean... we won't wait to be rescued?

It is possible that for some reason Sir Hanawa has been unable to get into the castle.

If there are reinforcements near, we should try to get closer to them, instead of hiding here and waiting for them to come to us.

But...

But there would only be reinforcements if Hanawa knew that we were here. If he didn't know, we should be on our own. But...

All right. I'll do what you say.

No. You must make the decision, Princess.

I had to make the decision? With something this important? No way! What was I supposed to do?

...

The princess - I mean, me - I'm good at sneaking out of castles, right?

So good that no one knows what to do with you.

Well then...

I wasn't the princess... but still.

Her logic there is a complete mess.

Well... Let's get out of here, then.

Understood. Princess, try moving your hands and feet.

Uh, yes.

The floor overhead was so low that there was no way to stand up, but I could at least stretch my arms and legs. My joints popped as I flexed them.

Was Muneshige laughing at me? He was glancing over at me just now...

After my body had finally warmed up, I followed Muneshige's lead and got down on my hands and knees.

Are you ready? We're going to crawl out just like this. We might run into some insects, but even if we do you can't make any noise.

Right.

I had to be careful. I couldn't let a bug make me scream or something. Wait... was that a cockroach?

Eeek.

Eeek.

Shh!

Huh? H-he was holding me...

Finally! The important choices start to appear! Romance! Adventure! More romance! Naked bishies taking a bath! Even more romance! People cut in little pieces! Etc, all of this and more from the next update forward. But before that, what will KKKodexhime do?






@ Miss Bee

Did you manage to clear Labyrinth of Touhou already? And that video is... is... unique. It is strangely rythmical, though, and the melody is quite the earworm. Kind of charming, too. And kind of disturbing, watching team nine's finest drawn like grown men.

But this segment...

I am rumia I live in darkness
The sun is something I wish to avoid
With arms outstretched I embrace the night
and I wont bump into walls this time!

... is simply song of the year, every year.

 

[Erebus]

When you said we'd have a choice to make, I expected it would be about how to escape from the castle. And when you said the last possible love interest was going to appear, I didn't realize what was missing until now was an evil love interest.

I suspect I wouldn't have made those mistakes if I'd been more familiar with otome games...


Let's push him away. I don't like his beard or his jokes, and I suspect romancing him is not going to be terribly entertaining.

 

[RK47]

Are you crazy? He's disqualified from the romance by default. He's not, because he's not. I mean, look at him. Lack the blood stain across his nose, but he's Hawke in Japan. Push him away!

 

[Kashmir Slippers]

Stay still.

He is better than all of the other asshats so far.

 

[Crooked Bee]

Hey, if we stay still, does that mean other romance routes become closed off? If yes, I vote to push him away; if no, I vote to stay still. I'm conditional like that.

Did you manage to clear Labyrinth of Touhou already?

Yup! I was thinking of doing an LP, but there's already a great ongoing one over at Something Awful. Wake me up when there's a translation patch for Gensou Shoujo Taisen, though.

EDIT: Messed it all up.

 

[Black Cat]

Hey, if we stay still, does that mean other romance routes become closed off? If yes, I vote to push him away; if no, I vote to stay still. I'm conditional like that.

No route becomes closed off until we actively pick one, yet all the choices we make decide which of the three endings (Happy ending, sad ending, forgotten dream ending) we get in whichever route we have picked. It's kind of arbitrary, that's why I'm letting all the choices in the hands of KKKodexhime instead of just the ones that decide the route.

So you have to vote!

Yup! I was thinking of doing an LP, but there's already a great ongoing one over at Something Awful. Wake me up when there's a translation patch for Gensou Shoujo Taisen, though.

Have you seen the light roguelike series? It's called Fushigi No Gensokyo, and it has, I believe, three games right now. They are pretty cool, I guess. Each one's introduction videos are worth the download by themselves. They are kind of like the Izuna games and the like. Or, say, kind of like Kagura Douchuuki without the racoon rape.

There's also this.

And you should that LP anyway.

 

[Crooked Bee]

I see. I vote to stay still then.

Have you seen the light roguelike series? It's called Fushigi No Gensokyo, and it has, I believe, three games right now. They are pretty cool, I guess. Each one's introduction videos are worth the download by themselves. They are kind of like the Izuna games and the like. Or, say, kind of like Kagura Douchuuki without the racoon rape.

Hey, I'll check that out, thanks.

There's also this.

Hell yeah, been thinking of this game in fact, thanks for the link. It even has a translation patch if I'm not confusing things again. Nice.

 

[spekkio]

5 pages and still no epic sex scene?

This is a fucking disgrace to wapanese gaming!

 

[Mrowak]

Thanks to your dull sword, I just managed to survive. But just looking at that face of yours makes my scars ache all over again.

His sexyness...!

That blond thing is a man? :shock:

*worldshatters*

Anyway, If it makes the gay party to keep away for at least one fraction of a meter, I vote for staying still. The alternative is just too derp.

 

[Crooked Bee]

That blond thing is a man? :shock:

*worldshatters*

Somehow your post reminded me of...

 

[Mrowak]

That blond thing is a man? :shock:

*worldshatters*

Somehow your post reminded me of...

So, is there any implied meaning I should be getting here Miss Bee?



This KKKodex after all

 

[Black Cat]

3vs2 for Staying Put. The bad taste is so dense I can touch it.



I'll be writing the update in a while.



Edit: @ Miss Bee

Have you play, um, 'ed Ever 17?

 

[lightbane]

Damn, that's so gay it's not fun...

... The fuck??

I vote to stay still, the less time we spent with these abominations, the better.

 

[Black Cat]

Sorry, Lightbane-Kun, but I believe you used the wrong three letters word to describe him. Maybe you wanted to say HOT instead? Yes, that's what I thought. Good thing we did catch that typo, indeed.

 

[RK47]

That blond thing is a man? :shock:

*worldshatters*

Somehow your post reminded me of...

i played this! it was very good for what it is.