Cassidy
Arcane
I don't think I ever did a Let's Play of any Crusader Kings game, so this will be my first. I'm using @Trash 's Memento Mori Expanded compilation, which means killing relatives not only has the risk to reputation, but also of wiping out an entire dynasty because deadly diseases, child mortality in general and childbirth deaths are much, much more common thanks to that mod. The Old Gods starting date has been done more than once, so I'm doing something different, by starting a game as Lithuania right after the total conquest of Prussia by the Teutonic Order, which makes it exist in-game, by the beginning of 1225.
I know Lithuania is not the weakest independent pagan country in 1225, but really, anything else would most certainly end as short lasted as that famous Wizardry IV Let's Play if done in ironman, as any CKII Let's Play should, the Teutonic Order has a scarily massive retinue, as you'll see in the first update, specially considering technological disparity, the Mongols are most likely coming, still united under a powerful if elderly Temujinn by the game start, and of course, keeping a pagan kingdom surrounded by Christians from falling apart internally will become important later in-game. So, enough descriptions and onto it.
===================
Index
====================
A cheesy in-game video from that Expansion of another game about this same age and place for starting this first update, that depicts precisely the odds of Lithuania without resorting to hitmen:
Only united, those faithful to Dievas and Perkunas shall stand a chance
Skyforger - Oh Fog, Oh Dew (Latvian Folk Metal, haters gonna hate)
Dausprungas I was born and have ruled for most of his life before these grim 1220s in a time Lithuania was isolated, its forests left to their fate, their people still devoted to the old gods, but his relatively peaceful rule over the still fragmented Lithuania was about to change. The Prussian tribes to the west were conquered by zealoust crusaders of the Teutonic Order on request of Poland, tired of their constant raiding, yet Poland's request later would become something they would regret. Meanwhile, to the east and north, a brutal Livonian Crusade nearly exterminated the Finnic Liv peoples, and brought the Latvians to utter subjugation under the zealous rule of the Archbishopric of Livonia that was founded after. The subjugations of the Prussians and Latvians and the extermination of the Livs was a rude wake-up call for the small and fragmented Lithuania, and the Gediminaitis' future was no longer so certain, for, just like they have slaughtered the families that once led the Prussians, sooner or later, these dreaded knights with their horned helmets shall come for Lithuania.
For too long the Lithuanians have been isolated and into inward thinking. The devotion to the old gods shall never end, but this must end. First order of business, of course, was getting Dausprungas married, and there weren't many available choices, so few there were that new dames were invited to the court, at a cost. His wife Gaudimante is Niasvizh, one of those damsels invited to the court, was chosen for being the daughter of a notorious Lithuanian Hitman, who have learned much about intrigue and deceit from her father and could definitively help a lot in this field.
(Note: Forgot to take her screenshots, so : Diplomatic skill - 0, Military -3 , Stewardship and Learning -6 and awesome Intrigue - 18. Slothful, Deceitful, Patient and Proud. IntricateHitman Webweaver, obviously )
There was only one goal among many for Dausprungas now that he wisely perceived the threat of the Teutonic Order would only increase: to become a grand duke, but not before he is also ready to become a king of all Lithuanians, lest all achievements in his life are broken by the worst shortcoming of Gavelkind: partition of his country into separate realms. He also sent his half-brother Mindaugas, a true Lithuanian Master of Hitmen and Spies, to study technology in lands where it is more advanced than the precariously backwards Lithuania, for that was dearly needed and for now he had not to worry about plots, or putting lives to an end while making it look like an accident for the greater good of Lietuva.
The Yatvyag tribes were doomed. An offer was presented, but they naturally refused, and thus, as they arrogantly think they can stop the Teutonic Order on their own, they will be brought to the fold of Lithuania before they are conquered by the crusaders. Their armies are small, and this conflict likely won't be particularly noteworthy.
Dausprungas may not be a very skilled High Chief, but he was a visionary, for he had to be one, and he was determined to attempt unifying the Balts still not subjugated by the Iron Cross. Meanwhile, in Asia, a mighty and likewise pagan Mongol Empire would soon put the towelheads in their place, for they foolishly declared a Jihad against the feared Genghis Khan himself, a Jihad ultimately doomed from the sparse information Lithuania had about that.
Hopefully, the calls for another of their fanatical Crusades for their"holy city" of Jerusalem lost to the religion of "peace" would drive the heat off the Baltic for a while, as the unification wars raged.
It was not a totally easy battle, and hundreds of good men died for this step into the birth of a new kingdom to stand against the Teutonic Order, but the Yatvyags were doomed to either fall to Lithuania or worse, to the Teutonic Order. This was the best fate they could have now. However, the subjugation could only be used as a justification for war once in a lifetime, and thus the completion of this bold goal would be something for Dausprungas' heirs to achieve.
The Teutonic Order however, they were as dangerous as they were arrogant, and eventually, the messengers of such murderous Germans and their false god got what they deserved for their threats of slavery and death, and with huge nails driven to their hats, they were kicked out as Dausprungas stereotypically replied to their accusation this was madness:
"THIS IS LITHUANIA!" and drove a hammer, not unlike that of Perkunas, into their skulls, smashing them open like the heads of a melon.
Despite his flaws, Dausprungas definitively got balls to send the envoys of the Teutonic Order back with hats nailed to their heads, for the Teutonic Order had a massive retinue that outnumbered their levies and certainly dangerously superior with over a thousand knights and over two thousand strong heavy infantrymen much better equipped than the Lithuanian counterparts. Yet, the crusade for Jerusalem was keeping them occupied, for now.
( Note: if they declare war against Lithuania too soon, rape incoming, for that is a very scary army to face. )
The powers of the Lithuanian Spies and Hitmen guided by their wise Master Mindaugas may be Lithuania's best, if not only hope of survival.
So wise he was he advised Dausprungas about how Danish Pommerania was much more advanced than those towelhead regions, and suggested for him to be sent there instead to do the same dangerous, risky and sometimes rewarding and pleasure-ridden work of being a Master of all Hitmen and Spies.
( Note: I forgot that the provinces with best tech level should change a lot from 800s, 1000s to 1200s, and maybe there is another European province with even more advanced techs, but for now that will do for the terribly backwards Lithuania)
Not all neighbors and close realms who knelt to the cross saw subjugation as the only means to spread their lies. Some sent WCDS missionaries to Lithuania, preaching, speaking their lies about how everyone else in the world but them will go to a Hell and saying Lithuania must abandon their "liberal" ways. What by the scythe of Giltine is liberal even supposed to mean? Their inane and irritating preaching is a source of much butthurt, and answered with their redirection toRPGWatch the Dungeon.
But besides being a source of butthurt, their mindless and stubborn preaching also is a potential source of profit, from the ransoms collected to send them back. They are more than welcome to return and pay another ransom to keep the treasury of Lithuania well.
And of course, eventually they conquered all the lands of the Yatvyag, and their Chief agreed to accept the High Chief of Lithuania as his liege. His wife, captured during one of the sieges, was released and returned to him, because he had no heirs, which could threaten this conquest later.
Lithuania is far from rich, and everyone needs to do a little to help, for the Teutonic menace will never end unless it is crushed one day, and considering they have a over five thousand strong retinue with more than one thousand knights, that day won't be coming any time soon.
Mindaugas was not the only man helping Lithuania abroad. Algirdas is Kreva, the Chancellor of Lithuania, happened to be a master troll, who knew just the right words to make the Catholic Potato neighbors fight each other so they won't try to conquer Lithuania instead by sowing dissent inside Poland. Perhaps such deeds may lack honour, or even honor, but one does not think of that when survival is hanging on a thin thread.
(Algirdas' Diplomatic skill: 18)
And more Christ-men came in and paid decent ransoms to be allowed out. Creating titles costs a lot of money and Lithuania is not very rich, so they are more than welcome to return always.
There was one more thing Dausprungas could do to get closer to the complete unification of what is left of the free Baltic Tribes. Lithuania had a long claim over certain lands belonging an almost equal in power Romuva chiefdom of Zemaitija to the east, bordered by the vile Livonian Order. This would be a war with his Great grandfather, Algimantas, a family war, but it had to be done, it was time to take what rightfully belonged the Gediminaitis: Suvalkai, also later known as Suwalki.
Both armies were almost even in quantity and quality, but Lithuania had superior leadership and the advantage of not crossing a river. It was bloody battle, and there was a small chance of it ending with defeat for the ambitious Dausprungas, but thanks to great heroes, the odds of defeat were small.
However, while Lithuania and the Gediminaitis dynasty fought for their continued survival, the Teutonic Order was given a part of Estonia, making them even more powerful than they already were. Yet ironically, such gift would end becoming a trojan horse not shortly after this.
Some wars are decided by one single battle, and this was one of them. Despite numerical parity, the superior warchiefs of Lithuania have shown who the gods favor more in these dark times for all Romuva. Soon they will realize they have no choice but to give in Suvalkai to their rightful owners.
Denmark, in an act of extreme dishonor, waged war against the Teutonic Order for the very land they donated to the Teutonic Order. Is their king a madman or something? What can they expect from doing something like this? Truly, their religion is one tailored for power-hungry lunatics and fanatics.
"Impale the worshippers of the Impaled Nazarene!" angrily shouted Dausprungas, whose growing cruelty would make him specially feared and loathed as he perfected a new brutal form of punishment and execution: the impalement. To be feared is all but necessary to buy time for Lithuania now, for a line of Teutonic knights impaled could serve as a vital destroyer of the morale of the crusaders, and it is about time someone think of the Livs and the genocide these worthless krauts did against them. Perhaps it is truly better to be feared than loved.
And with Suvalki, Dausprungas united Lithuania as far as he could in his lifetime, the rest of the task left to his heir, supposing Zemaitija is not swallowed by the crusaders until then. Fortunately, Algimantas, although not happy at all with losing in this conflict did not say:
"Great grandson, I am disappoint."
And hopefully he will have the wisdom to let one of his great grandsons rule all that is left of free Lithuania, but another war between relatives will most certainly be inevitable, if Zemaitija still stands once the next heir finishes the job of his father, this next heir for now being a 8-year old Tautvilas. Also, to prevent division of the realm, Dausprungas may have to abandon his ambition of becoming a Grand Duke, although unlikely circumstances(or a lot of capable Hitmen) may allow him to become a king without subjugating Zemaitija.
Will Lithuania and the Gediminaitis dynasty survive and remain faithful to the old Baltic gods while the Teutonic threat looms and slowly, from the east, the Mongol Hordes led by the old but widely respected Temujinn encroach into Eastern Europe?Will the Romuva faith ever stand a chance of standing to the test of time?
TO BE CONTINUED
I know Lithuania is not the weakest independent pagan country in 1225, but really, anything else would most certainly end as short lasted as that famous Wizardry IV Let's Play if done in ironman, as any CKII Let's Play should, the Teutonic Order has a scarily massive retinue, as you'll see in the first update, specially considering technological disparity, the Mongols are most likely coming, still united under a powerful if elderly Temujinn by the game start, and of course, keeping a pagan kingdom surrounded by Christians from falling apart internally will become important later in-game. So, enough descriptions and onto it.
===================
Index
- Only united, those faithful to Dievas and Perkunas shall stand a chance(Right Here)
- Wounding the horned beast
- Poking the Bear with a short stick
- Birth of a Baltic Kingdom
- Early reign of the First King
- Hitmen of Thrones
- Rymvidas II, The Khan of Lithuania
- The Second Prussian Crusade and the Rebirth of the Teutonic Order
- Russia, Russia never Changes
- The Beginning of the End
- God have mercy on England, because the Lithuanian Hitmen will have none!
- The Defiance of the last Pagans
- A New Church Smithed from Stone and Blood
- Karijotas the Great and Destroyer of the Rus
- Check your Agnatic Privilege
- Karijotas' Rising Empire: the march on Greater Potato
- One step short of an Empire
- Suffer not the Traitor, the Heretic and the Crusader
- A Baltic Empire
- The Penultimate War
- Return of the Teutonic Terror
- Apostates of the Norse gods shall meet their fate!
- Lithuanian Hitman 2: (Not so) Silent Assassin of Emperors
- All Hitmen open roads to Rome
- The Ending Medieval Era
====================
A cheesy in-game video from that Expansion of another game about this same age and place for starting this first update, that depicts precisely the odds of Lithuania without resorting to hitmen:
Only united, those faithful to Dievas and Perkunas shall stand a chance
Skyforger - Oh Fog, Oh Dew (Latvian Folk Metal, haters gonna hate)
Dausprungas I was born and have ruled for most of his life before these grim 1220s in a time Lithuania was isolated, its forests left to their fate, their people still devoted to the old gods, but his relatively peaceful rule over the still fragmented Lithuania was about to change. The Prussian tribes to the west were conquered by zealoust crusaders of the Teutonic Order on request of Poland, tired of their constant raiding, yet Poland's request later would become something they would regret. Meanwhile, to the east and north, a brutal Livonian Crusade nearly exterminated the Finnic Liv peoples, and brought the Latvians to utter subjugation under the zealous rule of the Archbishopric of Livonia that was founded after. The subjugations of the Prussians and Latvians and the extermination of the Livs was a rude wake-up call for the small and fragmented Lithuania, and the Gediminaitis' future was no longer so certain, for, just like they have slaughtered the families that once led the Prussians, sooner or later, these dreaded knights with their horned helmets shall come for Lithuania.
For too long the Lithuanians have been isolated and into inward thinking. The devotion to the old gods shall never end, but this must end. First order of business, of course, was getting Dausprungas married, and there weren't many available choices, so few there were that new dames were invited to the court, at a cost. His wife Gaudimante is Niasvizh, one of those damsels invited to the court, was chosen for being the daughter of a notorious Lithuanian Hitman, who have learned much about intrigue and deceit from her father and could definitively help a lot in this field.
(Note: Forgot to take her screenshots, so : Diplomatic skill - 0, Military -3 , Stewardship and Learning -6 and awesome Intrigue - 18. Slothful, Deceitful, Patient and Proud. Intricate
There was only one goal among many for Dausprungas now that he wisely perceived the threat of the Teutonic Order would only increase: to become a grand duke, but not before he is also ready to become a king of all Lithuanians, lest all achievements in his life are broken by the worst shortcoming of Gavelkind: partition of his country into separate realms. He also sent his half-brother Mindaugas, a true Lithuanian Master of Hitmen and Spies, to study technology in lands where it is more advanced than the precariously backwards Lithuania, for that was dearly needed and for now he had not to worry about plots, or putting lives to an end while making it look like an accident for the greater good of Lietuva.
The Yatvyag tribes were doomed. An offer was presented, but they naturally refused, and thus, as they arrogantly think they can stop the Teutonic Order on their own, they will be brought to the fold of Lithuania before they are conquered by the crusaders. Their armies are small, and this conflict likely won't be particularly noteworthy.
Dausprungas may not be a very skilled High Chief, but he was a visionary, for he had to be one, and he was determined to attempt unifying the Balts still not subjugated by the Iron Cross. Meanwhile, in Asia, a mighty and likewise pagan Mongol Empire would soon put the towelheads in their place, for they foolishly declared a Jihad against the feared Genghis Khan himself, a Jihad ultimately doomed from the sparse information Lithuania had about that.
Hopefully, the calls for another of their fanatical Crusades for their"holy city" of Jerusalem lost to the religion of "peace" would drive the heat off the Baltic for a while, as the unification wars raged.
It was not a totally easy battle, and hundreds of good men died for this step into the birth of a new kingdom to stand against the Teutonic Order, but the Yatvyags were doomed to either fall to Lithuania or worse, to the Teutonic Order. This was the best fate they could have now. However, the subjugation could only be used as a justification for war once in a lifetime, and thus the completion of this bold goal would be something for Dausprungas' heirs to achieve.
The Teutonic Order however, they were as dangerous as they were arrogant, and eventually, the messengers of such murderous Germans and their false god got what they deserved for their threats of slavery and death, and with huge nails driven to their hats, they were kicked out as Dausprungas stereotypically replied to their accusation this was madness:
"THIS IS LITHUANIA!" and drove a hammer, not unlike that of Perkunas, into their skulls, smashing them open like the heads of a melon.
Despite his flaws, Dausprungas definitively got balls to send the envoys of the Teutonic Order back with hats nailed to their heads, for the Teutonic Order had a massive retinue that outnumbered their levies and certainly dangerously superior with over a thousand knights and over two thousand strong heavy infantrymen much better equipped than the Lithuanian counterparts. Yet, the crusade for Jerusalem was keeping them occupied, for now.
( Note: if they declare war against Lithuania too soon, rape incoming, for that is a very scary army to face. )
The powers of the Lithuanian Spies and Hitmen guided by their wise Master Mindaugas may be Lithuania's best, if not only hope of survival.
So wise he was he advised Dausprungas about how Danish Pommerania was much more advanced than those towelhead regions, and suggested for him to be sent there instead to do the same dangerous, risky and sometimes rewarding and pleasure-ridden work of being a Master of all Hitmen and Spies.
( Note: I forgot that the provinces with best tech level should change a lot from 800s, 1000s to 1200s, and maybe there is another European province with even more advanced techs, but for now that will do for the terribly backwards Lithuania)
Not all neighbors and close realms who knelt to the cross saw subjugation as the only means to spread their lies. Some sent WCDS missionaries to Lithuania, preaching, speaking their lies about how everyone else in the world but them will go to a Hell and saying Lithuania must abandon their "liberal" ways. What by the scythe of Giltine is liberal even supposed to mean? Their inane and irritating preaching is a source of much butthurt, and answered with their redirection to
But besides being a source of butthurt, their mindless and stubborn preaching also is a potential source of profit, from the ransoms collected to send them back. They are more than welcome to return and pay another ransom to keep the treasury of Lithuania well.
And of course, eventually they conquered all the lands of the Yatvyag, and their Chief agreed to accept the High Chief of Lithuania as his liege. His wife, captured during one of the sieges, was released and returned to him, because he had no heirs, which could threaten this conquest later.
Lithuania is far from rich, and everyone needs to do a little to help, for the Teutonic menace will never end unless it is crushed one day, and considering they have a over five thousand strong retinue with more than one thousand knights, that day won't be coming any time soon.
Mindaugas was not the only man helping Lithuania abroad. Algirdas is Kreva, the Chancellor of Lithuania, happened to be a master troll, who knew just the right words to make the Catholic Potato neighbors fight each other so they won't try to conquer Lithuania instead by sowing dissent inside Poland. Perhaps such deeds may lack honour, or even honor, but one does not think of that when survival is hanging on a thin thread.
(Algirdas' Diplomatic skill: 18)
And more Christ-men came in and paid decent ransoms to be allowed out. Creating titles costs a lot of money and Lithuania is not very rich, so they are more than welcome to return always.
There was one more thing Dausprungas could do to get closer to the complete unification of what is left of the free Baltic Tribes. Lithuania had a long claim over certain lands belonging an almost equal in power Romuva chiefdom of Zemaitija to the east, bordered by the vile Livonian Order. This would be a war with his Great grandfather, Algimantas, a family war, but it had to be done, it was time to take what rightfully belonged the Gediminaitis: Suvalkai, also later known as Suwalki.
Both armies were almost even in quantity and quality, but Lithuania had superior leadership and the advantage of not crossing a river. It was bloody battle, and there was a small chance of it ending with defeat for the ambitious Dausprungas, but thanks to great heroes, the odds of defeat were small.
However, while Lithuania and the Gediminaitis dynasty fought for their continued survival, the Teutonic Order was given a part of Estonia, making them even more powerful than they already were. Yet ironically, such gift would end becoming a trojan horse not shortly after this.
Some wars are decided by one single battle, and this was one of them. Despite numerical parity, the superior warchiefs of Lithuania have shown who the gods favor more in these dark times for all Romuva. Soon they will realize they have no choice but to give in Suvalkai to their rightful owners.
Denmark, in an act of extreme dishonor, waged war against the Teutonic Order for the very land they donated to the Teutonic Order. Is their king a madman or something? What can they expect from doing something like this? Truly, their religion is one tailored for power-hungry lunatics and fanatics.
"Impale the worshippers of the Impaled Nazarene!" angrily shouted Dausprungas, whose growing cruelty would make him specially feared and loathed as he perfected a new brutal form of punishment and execution: the impalement. To be feared is all but necessary to buy time for Lithuania now, for a line of Teutonic knights impaled could serve as a vital destroyer of the morale of the crusaders, and it is about time someone think of the Livs and the genocide these worthless krauts did against them. Perhaps it is truly better to be feared than loved.
And with Suvalki, Dausprungas united Lithuania as far as he could in his lifetime, the rest of the task left to his heir, supposing Zemaitija is not swallowed by the crusaders until then. Fortunately, Algimantas, although not happy at all with losing in this conflict did not say:
"Great grandson, I am disappoint."
And hopefully he will have the wisdom to let one of his great grandsons rule all that is left of free Lithuania, but another war between relatives will most certainly be inevitable, if Zemaitija still stands once the next heir finishes the job of his father, this next heir for now being a 8-year old Tautvilas. Also, to prevent division of the realm, Dausprungas may have to abandon his ambition of becoming a Grand Duke, although unlikely circumstances(or a lot of capable Hitmen) may allow him to become a king without subjugating Zemaitija.
Will Lithuania and the Gediminaitis dynasty survive and remain faithful to the old Baltic gods while the Teutonic threat looms and slowly, from the east, the Mongol Hordes led by the old but widely respected Temujinn encroach into Eastern Europe?Will the Romuva faith ever stand a chance of standing to the test of time?
TO BE CONTINUED
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