KickStarter Baldr's Squid Isekai: A Parody - now available on Early Access

[Maxie]

Come on, why isn't there a size slider for the cock. This game is decline!

Same principle as above.

Look man, do I have to teach you everything.

You add the dick slider.

Then game references your dick size exactly one (1) time in dialogue. "Oh wow, you are pretty big!". Reactivity [X]

Nothing else changes.

It'd be a funny joke, but there's animation to go with the text and it's very much fixed towards the upper end of the endowment scale.

losers make excuses winners find a way

 

[Tyranicon]

You guys really want the tiny dick option huh?

 

[Lord_Potato]

You guys really want the tiny dick option huh?

They simply wish to feel represented

 

[Lord_Potato]

But seriously, when is the release of your new masterpiece planned?

 

[Tyranicon]

But seriously, when is the release of your new masterpiece planned?

End of this month, if everything goes planned.

 

[Tyranicon]

Be warned, the entire game is basically one massive, incredibly high-effort shitpost.

 

[Lord_Potato]

But seriously, when is the release of your new masterpiece planned?

End of this month, if everything goes planned.

You might want to update the Steam page then - there's still no clear release date 2 weeks before the actual release.

 

[Tyranicon]

But seriously, when is the release of your new masterpiece planned?

End of this month, if everything goes planned.

You might want to update the Steam page then - there's still no clear release date 2 weeks before the actual release.

Yup, already on it. Just working through some stuff that Steam needs on the backend. Entirely possible the game gets delayed a few days because I forgot to check a box somewhere.

That's my fault and one of the cons of my unorthodox, hyper-fast development style.

I like living on the edge.

 

[mediocrepoet]

Be warned, the entire game is basically one massive, incredibly high-effort shitpost.

Fuck this game. I wanted a low effort shitpost.

 

[ERYFKRAD]

Be warned, the entire game is basically one massive, incredibly high-effort shitpost.

Yakuza got you beat.

 

[Tyranicon]

Be warned, the entire game is basically one massive, incredibly high-effort shitpost.

Yakuza got you beat.

Whoa there, this isn't that high effort.

 

[Nostaljaded]

You guys really want the tiny dick option huh?

They simply wish to feel represented

If your CGs and accompanying text do not have the 'tiny dick' variation when providing such a starting option, that would be a 'misrepresentation' though.
So save your resources for other more fruitful features.


An ero doujin [I know of] that does provide the option (by specifying to the millimeter [within 'reasonable' min/max limits]) has 3 such variations (tiny/normal/large).
It even has minor consequences on waifu's affection level after every usage activity [hearsay, could only verify in late game/new game+].

 

[Tyranicon]

Yes, I made a dick potion. I mean, that's not it's intended use but....

 

[Caim]

So how is dick strength used in game? Do you get to bang larger women with it (as in taller, not fatter)? Do you get to use it in skill tests? Do you get to hammer your dick into a cliffside to aid in climbing?

 

[Lord_Potato]

So how is dick strength used in game? Do you get to bang larger women with it (as in taller, not fatter)? Do you get to use it in skill tests? Do you get to hammer your dick into a cliffside to aid in climbing?

Most likely increases piercing damage against armored opponents

 

[Tyranicon]

There might be....

-tents fingers evilly-

Attribute checks in sex.

 

[mediocrepoet]

So how is dick strength used in game? Do you get to bang larger women with it (as in taller, not fatter)? Do you get to use it in skill tests? Do you get to hammer your dick into a cliffside to aid in climbing?

Most likely increases piercing damage against armored opponents

Sweet. Maybe we can bang lizardman chicks!

 

[Tyranicon]

Sweet. Maybe we can bang lizardman chicks!

This ain't a skyrim mod.

 

[mediocrepoet]

Sweet. Maybe we can bang lizardman chicks!

This ain't a skyrim mod.

Of course not. Skyrim doesn't care about whether or not your cock is strong enough to pierce armoured hides.

 

[Caim]

Sweet. Maybe we can bang lizardman chicks!

This ain't a skyrim mod.

Of course not. Skyrim doesn't care about whether or not your cock is strong enough to pierce armoured hides.

Side question: can Argonians breathe in liquids other than water? Is there some kind of limit to viscosity before they start suffocating?

 

[ERYFKRAD]

man chicks!

Bruh

 

[Tyranicon]

-does combat testing-

I can't tell if the game is some kind of sadomasochistic torture or just perfect in difficulty.

 

[Tyranicon]

My blog post about being a tryhard:

So, I spent months obsessively designing a RPG combat system from scratch

It’s no secret that I’ve been less than happy with the combat systems in my released games. While they are serviceable, a combination of technical and design inexperience, as well as time pressures, meant that I was unable to make them what I wanted them to be. But that’s to be expected, after all, game development is a learning experience.

I’ve said a few times during the development of Memoirs that I was refining the combat in that game to be more fun and open, but that came at the cost of challenge, and in many ways, it was a crude system that lacked mathematical elegance.

Of course, what I want is a combat system that could stand alongside any of its peers, both video games and tabletop RPGs, and still hold its own. A system that provides a crunchy simulation of turn-based combat, one that is simple but still contains depth, and above all is fun to play.

A lofty goal for any game designer. Veteran RPG devs, people who have been working in this field for years, are still striving towards this goal. It’s something that I’ve personally desired for a long time too.

I certainly wasn’t going to achieve it in my first two or three games. But on my fourth, I’ll give it a shot :D.

This isn’t a system designed in a vacuum. I spent months contemplating what RPG enthusiasts really like about turn-based combat, as well as my personal preferences from both tabletop campaigns and the cRPGs I’ve enjoyed. Low numbers vs high numbers, types of damage mitigation, RNG vs determinism, build balance and tactical considerations.

In the end, what I have can neither be described as unique nor startlingly complex, but hopefully as something that is robust and fun.

I am very excited to unveil the Memory Battle System 3.0 with the Early Access launch of Baldr’s Squid Isekai next month, my low-effort parody game that is getting decidedly more high-effort every passing day. The same system will also be present in Vampire Syndicate and That Which Rises, although possibly with changes.

I hope you enjoy it, and as always, I appreciate your feedback.

 

[Zombra]

Will the Steam and itch versions of the game be identical? Sometimes I know Steam requires you to get an external patch to unlock all the errrr content.

 

[Tyranicon]

Will the Steam and itch versions of the game be identical? Sometimes I know Steam requires you to get an external patch to unlock all the errrr content.

They will be 100% identical with the usual caveat of not being able to get Steam achievements, etc on Itch (if I choose to do that).

Steam has allowed porn games for a while now. You no longer have to do external patch shenanigans unless it's stuff that Steam doesn't allow, which my games won't have.