Let's Smite Some Ragheads as the Knights of Rhodes!

[Drakron]

Not sure if he'll lose this time, since the other front is full of pushovers, his fleet is strong, and he has Western armies.

Too high Infamy means everyone gets a a free CB at you.

He got the Ultimatum at 27.1 and instead of significantly lowering it, he declares war with a 26.7 score that pushes it to 27.5 that gives Poland the CB.

 

[Destroid]

Austria will declare war on him after he is involved in a few wars, unless they have great relations.

 

[SCO]

IT ON BABY! IT'S ON!

 

[Furious Flaming Faggot]

I'm not really going to let my Empire collapse bros. I want to leave something stable and strong. Worse comes to worse the Balkan front gets horribly raped. If anything I'm liberated now. I have so many avenues for easy expansion, and i no longer have to worry about infamy.

 

[Furious Flaming Faggot]

Fuuuu-

Shit has come up, i don't think i can update for today, tomorrow or Friday. Sorry bros

 

[ironyuri]

Fuuuu-

Shit has come up, i don't think i can update for today, tomorrow or Friday. Sorry bros

We will call of the lynch mob so that you may smite the raghead another day, bro.

 

[Vaarna_Aarne]

Meanwhile, my Austria campaign: Redux has proceeded into 1700s. This time it goes a lot smoother, with only four provinces having Autonomous Estates (Lombardia and Parma, and due to their brief time as a partner of Wurzburg Liegnice and Gloskowitz have Autonomous Estates). Hereditary HRE with flying colours, partitioned Poland pretty much between myself and with the mudpeople areas going to Russia, with upper Congress Poland and Lithuania remaining Polish (somehow, since I did force them to release Lithuania). The von Habsburgs are also the most prominent house in Europe, being the ruling family of Austria, France, Prussia (I love Espionage idea now due to assassination), Luxemburg, Cyprus and Hesse. And with the exception of Prussia, which is a recent addition to the clan, this has been so for centuries.

I have also taken to using Settlement Policy to my heart's content this time around, with so far the Slovaks and Czech being wiped off the face of the earth. Croatians are pending, following the purification of Wallachia/Alba/Oltenia from Slavs. I think I can still make it to the Croats in time due to the way Liberte speeds up Settlement Policy along National Focus.

 

[Destroid]

I tell you what, it's tough to run an economy when your infamy blows out.

 

[LusciousPear]

I fucking love that peanut.

Potato, motherfucker! POTATO!

: x

FFFFFFFFFFFF

 

[Pegultagol]

Peanut is for the decadent monocle types

I thought you're going to smite the Islam off the face of the earth, but of course the butthurt European humanists had to get in your way.

Great LP! This is quickly turning into a worldwide scale conflict, do you have any allies by any chance?

 

[Qah]

I am quite proud of you bum, you have managed quite well as the knights, I despise those thrice damned muslim sandniggers.

 

[marooned]

It's saturday.

 

[Furious Flaming Faggot]

Sorry bros, i just had the most tedious weekend imaginable. Having family sucks, but at least now they're obliged to provide food and shelter to me when my house inevitably explodes. I'll start updating again tomorrow.

 

[Furious Flaming Faggot]

Unfortunately my most recent save is corrupted, so i have been forced to go back to a save before the potatolanders attacked. Unfortunate but necessary, this update will have plenty of fighting anyways. Updatan.

 

[Furious Flaming Faggot]

Another Ultimatum arrives in Constantinople. The Grandmaster isn't entirely sure who is sending these Ultimatums, but he has the emissary impaled regardless.

The Grandmaster decides to expel the prosperous Jewish communities in Iraq for the purpose of funding a great construction work in the capital. The Grandmaster wishes to build the greatest university the world over in his city, to further Catholic learning and make Constantinople once again the center of European civilization.

A church council is to be held in Rhodes, the symbolic home of the Order for many centuries. The council is called to resolve many major issues of doctrine, but it will take several months for the council to come to any solid decision.

A war college is built alongside the Constantinople university. Several smaller colleges are also constructed in the major cities of the Order. The best men of the Empire will learn how to make war in the name of the Lord.

A new colony is founded in Ethiopia, further extending the Order's grip down the Nile.

The remaining Muslim Arab states have been a troublesome lot ever since Alexandria was conquered. With the Berbers and the Persians no longer a threat, the Grandmaster can look to the Southern frontier. It will take a while to completely eradicate the independent Arab states. They should not be much of a challenge, but the vast distances and the terrain involved will make for a bloody and complicated campaign.

The war immediately begins with the main campaigning army tearing through Najd (again, how do you occupy desert?) and smashing major Yemeni coastal fortifications. The Red sea fleet moves to blockade the Yemen, but it is dealt a severe defeat. This humiliation is a stinging one, so the Grandmaster resolves to deprive the Yemen Sultan of his naval infrastructure.

The coast of Yemen is completely occupied, despite the enormous cost in Catholic life.

Meanwhile, the church council of Rhodes finally draws to a close. Despite the great difficulty in hosting and organizing the council, great leaps are made in church doctrine. Not only that but the Order's influence over the church grows, as the interests of Constantinople and Roma grow ever closer.

The eradication of the Red Sea fleet means that the nearby island of Socotra cannot be occupied. Instead the Yemen Arabs are deprived of their coastal territory. Looks like that Wahabi doctrine wasn't good for much after all.

An extremely bloody campaign, but definitely worth it. You may notice i have a very low manpower limit, but it replenishes extremely quickly. I am easily capable of just plowing right through the most attrition heavy of territory without too much difficulty, so long as my WE doesn't get too high.

Immediately the nomadic leaders of the conquered territory look for opportunity to revolt. The tribal chiefs are granted titles and rights, but despite this they still need to be put down.

The Grandmaster decides not to push too far into Oman, so the Yemeni land can be properly garrisoned before a massive revolt breaks out.

Most of the land taken is useless, but the important Indian Ocean trading city of Muscat is taken, along with several minor Yemeni cities.

Check out how much money they're demanding. I wish i could actually pay that much.

!

!!!

The peasants are revolting!

Colonists rise up in arms against the government. I'm not sure how they mustered 3000 men in a colony of about 200 people, but this is a threat that must be taken seriously. This Godless revolutionary movement stands to spread rapidly across the Empire. God help us if it gains any kind of momentum. The Grandmaster decides to begin a campaign of counter-revolutionary propaganda to combat this. The government is always the loudest voice, but this new development may prove to be extremely dangerous.

Civil war!

 

[LusciousPear]

KKND! KKND!

 

[Furious Flaming Faggot]

More troops are conscripted in Egypt to put down the revolution in the Lower Egyptian colonies. The Grandmaster is reluctant to move troops from the other provinces of the Empire, in case major revolts break out.

The major campaigning army is split into two armies, until a provincial legion can be mustered for Southern Arabia.

Morale begins to slip across the army. The revolutionary ideals seem to have some sway over the minds of the soldiery. The huge counter revolutionary propaganda campaign is extended to the soldiery, despite the huge cost. Without its armies, the Order would within the week.

Groups of influential intellectuals spring up. They are mostly concentrated in the more liberal Greece. This rise of revolutionary ideology is worrying. Their resistance is more passive, so the Grandmaster is not inclined to have them all slaughtered.

The revolution fails to take off. Instead nationalist and religious revolt breaks out in the furthest corners of the Empire. These revolts are easily crushed by the local provincial legions. Most rebellions simply dissolve as the nationalists realize the futility of their cause.

The problem with this is because of the limitations of the game, it decimates non-rebel armies as well.

The rebel scum fail to gain any significant ground. Thankfully it would appear that the civil war has been mitigated.

Nomadic leaders rise up in revolt in Arabia. This is more problematic as it's a large region with a small garrison.

NIGGERS! This will not be forgotten! They even have the gall to attack the colonies, forcing the survivors to flee back to Upper Egypt.

Meanwhile, the Kingdom of Ethiopia is using its recent independence to attack the East African Muslim states. The Somali Muslims are crushed, and Ethiopia gains momentum down the East African coast.

:/

Burn it, kill them all! They're only heathens anyways!

Odd that events in a very recently acquired territory on the southeasternmost corner of the Empire can completely ruin the stability of a major European Empire.

The nomadic leaders in Arabia continue to revolt against the righteous authority of the Grandmaster. They shouldn't be threatening, but because of the size of the territory the Arabian army cannot put them all down in anything approaching a timely manner.

The rebellion in Arabia continues to grow in the Omani territory. The survivors of Muscat rise up against the murderous garrison.

Maybe that crush kill and destroy stratagem wasn't the best idea.

For some reason, the commander decides to order an assault against the rebel garrison (i have no clue why i did this, i guess I'm used to overwhelming garrisons with mass now.) causing the useless death of many thousands of Order soldiers.

I decide to move back towards serfdom (I wanted the rebellion to escalate because really the entire Empire should have revolted by now). You'd think the people of the Empire wouldn't take it so well.

The campaigning army is ordered back to Arabia to put down the Nomadic revolters.

Georgian scum.

Well, at least the major provinces aren't revolting. It's not like everyone hates me, the Pope is still on my side...

Huh?

Oh.

Well fuck.

Why is the sand green?

I'm amazed i haven't gotten a revolution at this point. If they keep revolting, I'll keep killing them. For a civil war this is pretty tedious and boring.

Hell, I'm still making lots of converts in Mesopotamia, Azerbaijan and the Balkans. You'd think now that the Pope has condemned me to hell they wouldn't be so inclined to convert to a faith that involves listening to the wisdom of the Pope.

Silly rebels.

The borders of the Empire have receded slightly due to poor management, but now the Order can recover. Converts will be made, the army will be expanded, and when the many truces with neighboring states end, it will be time for war to begin anew.

 

[Vaarna_Aarne]

This has turned out way too much like the Qing LP.

 

[Fens]

(again, how do you occupy desert?)

you block the trade routes by conquering the forts that guard the water holes... profit

Why is the sand green?

tiberium

 

[Furious Flaming Faggot]

You did suggest getting rid of those crazy Arabs. I am planning to convert these territories en masse. I haven't forgotten my original goals, I'm just going about it in a larger and more chaotic way.

 

[silver crowaxe]

Nice.

 

[Qah]

I call sheer atrocious bullshit on the fact that The Entirity of Europe, India, and Niggerland hasn't attacked you en masse yet with your high infamy rate.

 

[Vaarna_Aarne]

The AI doesn't usually start wars it can't win, and it doesn't have an idea of making a massive attack with all countries with the CB since each AI country only considers itself. Unless it's scripted aggression (ie, Scandinavian countries outside of Sweden REALLY wanting to kick Holstein's ass even without CB). Now, bum has a large country with high tech and considerable armies, so it figures the AI would be careful, especially the Asian countries (in fact, I've never seen non-Europeans declare war on Europeans).

 

[Furious Flaming Faggot]

You know entirety doesn't need to be capitalized. I guess they're all just a bunch of backstabbing pussies. They'll attack when i show any kind of weakness.

 

[Malakal]

Probably. You are more likely to get destroyed by unforgiving events a'la MMU. Backstab comes to mind...