Cassidy
Arcane
Quiet before the Storm, Part 1
Ride the Worm (Note: How can you argue Gaddafi wouldn't fit as the ruler of a House in Duniverse? In fact I'm going to stop using "Galactic Libyan Republic". House Gaddafi sounds much more appropriate and next update I'll rename the civilization to it.)
Ron Perlman's Voice(Just imagine he is narrating everything LOL): The year is 2152. Tensions slowly grow between House Gaddafi and the United States of Earth. A full survey of all anti-Newtonian resources in Sol becomes the greatest strategic priority for the Pimp of Pimps, before a massed colonization and mining program can start on the richest spots. This includes scanning Earth too. One of the Mecca Class Survey Ships thus began to scan the Blue Planet. The head of the all-female Palace Guard of the Pimp of Pimps was heading in to bring the reports.
"My pimp, we have confirmed the survey of Earth wasn't interrupted through hostile action by USE forces. Apparently they have agreed with your offer or are too ignorant to oppose."
"Excellent. My plan proceeds flawlessly, Colonel Katja Hamsun. The illiterate fools have no idea of what is coming for them. What about our diplomatic relations?" Could you call the head of diplomacy for a short meeting?"
"Of course, Invincible Colonel. *clicks* It is done, she should be coming up soon. Also, forgive me, if I may ask, but why have you chosen so many women to assume important positions?"
"I am the PIMP OF PIMPS, Colonel, what do you think? Dismissed, and have a nice day."
Thus, while the attractive chick left the Throne Room of the Emperor of Emperors, eventually came another, not so attractive old woman(or was it a man?) who had a bloodied knife in one of her hands. Gaddafi looked at her and shunned her:
"Our cloning vats aren't for your personal enjoyment, my daughter. One day every clone you play with might be missed because if you haven't noticed yet, we are in a still lifeless rock, our potential enemies have a much greater population than ours, and there is a shortage of seven million unfulfilled jobs in our economy because there is more infrastructure than people to work at it right now!"
"Easy to say that for you who abandoned me for thirty years in Earth! You have no idea what I had to do to not get killed by those savages from Libya! It's all about resources! Efficiency here, productivity there, big plan elsewhere. And you don't care for me, or for mom, or for what's left of our family, only for your big plans of galactic conquest!"
"Are you blind? If we don't gain an advantage and if these plans fail, we are all going to die! Or worse! Wake up daughter! Think on the long term for a change! There is a warfleet of hundreds of spaceships just a few million kilometers from here, and who knows how big their ground army is? We cannot afford to make mistakes. I am doing this and warning you because I care about you!"
"You are overreacting. What difference will make cloning a whining deformed baby, a small blind kid and the other cess of the gene pool from the vats? It's not like I'm taking a hundred every year. I prefer to ensure... they last as much as possible."
She laughed a EVIL MANIACAL LAUGHTER(TM).
"One hundred lives is just a statistic anyway, but hear this. From now on I'll program an yearly quota for you on the vats, and don't even try hacking through it. Hit that quota and you'll be dry for the rest of the year. Remember that all of this requires water, and Mars has only 10% of..."
"Drinkable Water! Earth has much less than it! Don't come with this bullshit over me or... do you want to have fun with me?"
"Just because you're my daughter you don't have the right to threaten me. That is it, I'm halving the quota I was going to give to you and I'll teach you a lesson."
In spite of the bloodied knife, the Pimp of Pimps has such title for a reason. One rapid, strong bitchslap on the face was enough to make his rebellious and psychotic daughter drop the blade, and after that, he rapidly went in to slap her on the ass until it was red. She, or is it a man? cried and departed in shame, literally butthurt, but not before dropping a report.
"What did I do to deserve a family like this?"
So the United States of Earth relations are worsening, he thought.
"Science director, come here!"
"My liege, what do you request?"
"How long until all necessary technology for at least Planetary Defense Centers is completed?
"By November, development of all sensors will be concluded. However, there will be the need of designing missile launchers for the PDCs as well, which should take a few more months. I can guarantee that in early 2153 all technological conditions for construction of plantary defenses will be in place."
"Excellent, the plan continues going well. Dismissed!"
Gaddafi wrote a memo on not giving him any reports on "near worthless mineral deposits".
"Sir, we have worrying reports. The United States of Earth continues to expand their star fleet at a dramatic rate. They just christened several of what we believe to be warships, and have over sixty of them."
"Numbers won't defeat the Invincible Colonel! Continue monitoring their fleet operations from within our sensors range."
Time goes on with new discoveries, sometimes not really pleasant ones:
"Bastards! They think they can outrun us in the race for the wealthiest mineral sources of this solar system? They're going to regret it. Mark this asteroid as a priority. I want all its infrastructure wiped out as soon as we have a proper warfleet to engage those dumbfucks, so my cousins can build civilian mining colonies in that one."
"As you wish."
And time moved on. Watching movements of the USE fleets, it became evident something big was going on.
The question was: what exactly? It was never truly made certain. They only presumed the USE were at war with the Unknown Furfags.
"Good news, my Liege, everything is set in sensors technology for the design of planetary defense centers. Our teams will now focus on the missile launchers."
"The best thing is that whence Mars get very close to Earth we can attack them using the PDCs only! They will pay the price for the path of idiocy they led mankind into! I WILL RULE EARTH AND CONQUER THE GALAXY! AND THEN THE ENTIRE UNIVERSE!"
"My liege? Do you wish to have other research projects interrupted so that focus goes on the launchers?"
"Of course, the sooner construction of PDCs start, the better."
"We'll get to it immediately."
And the race never ends for the resources of this star system, the cradle of mankind.
"Just another target. Don't worry, there is still some good natural resources for us. Venus for one, they never bothered with it... and maybe some asteroids still not surveyed. And maybe other solar systems. I suppose the shipyard production of the newest Medina Class Interstellar Surveys is going fine now that at last you made proper jump drives for them?"
"Indeed, my liege, they will be ready by 2154."
"Four years of rule and I will already be making a glorious interstellar empire. Who else could be given such credit of awesomeness?"
"GADDAFU AKBAR!"
However, one news would confirm certain suspicions:
"Emperor of Emperors, we have confirmed unknown furfags vessels in what appears to be a poorly planned invasion attempt of Earth. It is very likely the United States of Earth are at war with the Unknown Furfags rather than a supposition, now."
"Excellent, I don't even need to pull some strings to make these degenerates fight each other, it seems. Keep me updated."
And then, finally the ultimate news: SOON THE GLORIOUS HOUSE GADDAFI WILL HAVE MEANS OF DEFENDING THEIR GLORIOUS GADDAFI'S WORLD!
"My liege, we came with two proposals of Planetary Defense Centers. Here their are:"
Code:
Idi Amin class Planetary Defence Centre 154.450 tons 5894 Crew 29974,1997 BP TCS 3089 TH 0 EM 0
Armour 34-256 Sensors 1/720 Damage Control Rating 0 PPV 180
Troop Capacity: 5 Battalions Magazine 23316
GBS-1 PDC ABM Missile Launcher (36) Missile Size 1 Rate of Fire 5
GBS-2 PDC Missile Launcher (12) Missile Size 12 Rate of Fire 40
MEC Akbar-116640 Missile Fire Control (2) Range 116,6m km Resolution 4
MEC Akbar-4900 Anti-ballistic Fire Control (36) Range 45,4m km Resolution 1
Shield of Faith Anti-ballistic Missile (8640) Speed: 29.400 km/s End: 2,5m Range: 4,5m km WH: 1 Size: 1 TH: 352 / 211 / 105
Kwanzaa Cluster Missile (1223) Speed: 10.000 km/s End: 125m Range: 79,4m km WH: 0 Size: 12 TH: 33 / 20 / 10
MEC Djinn-86930 Search Sensor (2) GPS 6480 Range 86,9m km Resolution 20
MEC Djinn-4700 Missile Warning Sensor (2) GPS 720 Range 43,2m km Resolution 1
Missile to hit chances are vs targets moving at 3000 km/s, 5000 km/s and 10,000 km/s
This design is classed as a Planetary Defence Centre and can be pre-fabricated in 62 sections
Code:
Intifada class Planetary Defence Centre 56.350 tons 2861 Crew 12247,7999 BP TCS 1127 TH 0 EM 0
Armour 34-130 Sensors 1/720 Damage Control Rating 0 PPV 156
Troop Capacity: 1 Battalion Magazine 5940
GBS-1 PDC ABM Missile Launcher (12) Missile Size 1 Rate of Fire 5
GBS-2 PDC Missile Launcher (12) Missile Size 12 Rate of Fire 40
MEC Akbar-116640 Missile Fire Control (2) Range 116,6m km Resolution 4
MEC Akbar-4900 Anti-ballistic Fire Control (12) Range 45,4m km Resolution 1
MEC Djinn-4700 Missile Warning Sensor (1) GPS 720 Range 43,2m km Resolution 1
MEC Djinn-86930 Search Sensor (1) GPS 6480 Range 86,9m km Resolution 20
This design is classed as a Planetary Defence Centre and can be pre-fabricated in 23 sections
"Our time is running out. The United States of Earth government continually sends barely intelligible statements accusing us of being "boring, antiquated elitist cunts with rose-tinted glasses of nostalgia ruining their fun" and recently they even came threatening to "Unlock the achievement of defeating Mars", the closely we could translate their word in their dumbspeak. We must be ready to hold out soon, so that one day, we will put these dumbfucks in their place and give my enlightened population permanent leisure as the dumbfucks toil in joy camps for my glory! Therefore, focus all industrial production in the construction of Intifada Class PDCs!"
"It is done. The first PDC will be ready at the beggining of the next year. However, may I suggest expanding the ordnance production factories? Ramping up the production of missiles will be important to ensure the PDCs are always loaded up for battle."
"Once the first PDC is built, yes"
"While my diplomatic team buys time with inanity tricking the dumbfucks, we shall built an impenetrable line of defenses in my world, and then, ALL WILL BE SET FOR EARTH TO BE MINE!"