Last Dragonian
Novice
So, without further ado, let's play. . .
A.K.A. Illusion of Gaia, Records of the Illusion of Gaia, Gaia Gensōki, and also Come dance with us to the Incan ship.
Our story begins. . .
- A year Has passed since I went to the Tower of Babel with my father. My Father and his party met with disaster. Somehow, I made it back to South Cape. . .I still can't believe my father is gone. I'll never believe it. . .When I grow up, I'll be an explorer and see the world.
- Now, don't go wandering out there. Demons have appeared outside of town. If you go very far, you must go with your parents.
The mandatory bookworm.
That guy. Probably been too many times "kept after school".
The Brick.
No hitting on me? We must be new at school. Oh well, not much more to do, to the roof!
Lance:
- Alone, at last.
Lance:
Church roofs are so dull. . .hey, one of those funky vitros.
I MUST BREAK YOU
Wait, this is not a vitro. This is not a vitro AT ALL.
Welcome toDead Dark Space. That's Momma Gaia. Momma Gaia is a pretty cool gal, seh patches you up, gives you PROTIP's and doesn't afraid of anything. But, Back into character. . .
OH GOD, IS THAT A MOVING GIANT MULTIPLE-HORNED-GOAT-HITTING-A-WOMAN STONE HEAD? . . .can I take it home?
AH, it talks! KILL IT GODDAMMIT
- Only one with the Dark Power can see this space.
- So. . .I belong to the Dark side?
- You are the chosen one.
- Which makes me Darth Revan.
- As your mother I don't recomme--
- FUCK YOU I'M THE CHOSEN ONE *gets out of pocket dimension*
Back on the Church Roof. . .
FUCK YOU I'M THE CHOSEN ONE AND AS SUCH, I WILL SHOW YOU MY POWER.
NO CHURCH IS HIGH ENOUGH FOR MEEEEE--
Oh, it didn't kill me. Huh.
PROTIP random NPC.
Mirror's Edge, eat your heart out.
- I will give you goods for your jewels as written on the list.
"My secrets" sounds like a Naga-ette Bromide of sorts. 50 gems? YOU'RE ON, OLD MAN.
Because weird lit-on-fire gems don't affect Sneak. Oh well, let's explore some more
Town exit.
NPC: DIDN'T YOUR TEACHER WARN YOU NOT to leave town without your parents?
- He also said "Eat this, for it symbolizes my body, and drink this, for it symbolizes my soul" after pulling down his pants. Also, you're a douche, I have no parents and it's not like you don't know
Let's go to shake some hou--
*hit by a pot* Whoa man, watch it!
Seth's mother: I put up with it for Seth's Sake, but if it weren't for him, I'd have left long ago!
- Because he loves you so much he spends his time away at a sea cave with his friends doing God knows what.
Moving on. . .
NPC: Not like mine under this scarf. . .
Middle-Eastern Christians. Way to go, religion.
OP IN DA HOUSE
. . .Outside? What is this outside you're talking about?
I-I can explain, sir. It was ERIK'S FAULT, HE'S ALWAYS WANTING ME TO STICK MY FLUTE IN HIS--
- Ha ha. Excellent! Even if a boy can't study, he should show a little initiative.
Off to Erik's house
Big house, big shots.
Hipster + Moneybags = My milkshake brings all the boyz to South Cape.
Mah baby's on fi-eee-ire. . .
Better use END as dump sta-eee-ate.
Some kids playing Green light, Red light on the roof make me feel suicidal, all of a sudden. So, I decide it's time to go see mah nigguhs.
Erectile disfunction: Attacking South Cape fishermen since 1994.
Ah, here we are. The gang's hideout.
- They gathered there to talk and play games until sundown
Lance: I'm playing cards with Seth. Wait a minute.
- You finished Radical Dreamers with every possible ending?
Erik: The princess of Edward Castle has run away! They say she came to South Cape!
YOUR ROYAL SHENANIGANS DON'T IMPRESS LANCE
Lance: You came in such a hurry that I thought something really big had happened! The princess is probably. that spoiled girl, Kara. . .The one you like so much!
Erik: LIAR! Maybe the soldiers will come here looking for her!
Erik: I want to see Will's mysterious power. You haven't seen it? He can move things without touching them.
Lance: Will. Show me again.
-I DIDN'T SIGN UP FOR THIS, YOU'RE THE TOOL!
Seth: PROTIP: Face The statue and push the L/R buttons.
So, we proceed to put on a good show
*vacuum sound*
Seth: No matter how many times I see it, I'm still amazed. But why can you move the statue when you can't move anything else. . .?
OH SO MYSTERIOUS.
Lance: I'll put four cards face down. Pick the one you think is the Ace of Diamonds.
*insert Yu-gi-oh abridged bug man joke here*
*drumroll*
Lance: Ahhh! Right!!
Erik: I'm speechless. . .Hey, Seth. This is some type of psychic power, right?
Seth: Yeah, it must be some kind of psychic power thing. If I didn't know better I'd think it was magic. We have five senses, seeing, hearing, taste, smell, and touch. I think Will's psychic power is some kind of sixth sense.
Lance: [INT check failed]What Seth says is too complicated for me to understand.
Using the power of Time Travel, we check and. . .
every card. . .
is the. . .
right one. And I thought I had true psychic powers. I'm just another alchemist. Oh well, play time's over.
. . .you'd probably be in a circus and not playing as an almost irrelevant NPC. Way to go, EriKKKKNGGGHHHH
Let's get outta here
Psychic tutorials are a waste of time. Let's go home and eat some fruitcake.
WHERE'S MAH DINoh hey
When was the last time we had porkchops? C'mere boy!
Hasta la vista, Porky.
. . .should have picked dad's sword and not his fucking FLUTE. Oh well, let's see what grandma can do about this pig.
But then!
Porky gets friendly with my crotch.
Too friendly, in fact. Huh, someone's coming down the stairs.
To be or not to be lunch. That is this pig's question.
Kara: Frankly (Mr. Shankly) you look a little shabby. . . .
PRINCESS Oh right, I'm not supposed to know.
Kara: Your father? Mother? Not here, huh?
:
- My father's an explorer, he. . . . .
Kara: I know. Olman, the explorer. They say he was lost.
Will: He'll come back some day.
Kara: Are you sad? . . .No? I'd be sad if it were me. I'm sorry. . .
Kara: Anyway, is there a piano here?
Will: No, there isn't!Get the fuck outta my house! But Grandma Lola is a great singer.
Kara: They're singing upstairs now. They have such loud voices!!
And trust people too easily.
- Dinner's not ready yet
- Oh, my! I haven't sung like this in a long time. Your grandmother Lola used to be a singer. I fell in love with her voice. That's why I married her.
- Ah ha ha. Oh, you!! Bringing up a thing like that! Will, you shouldn't be surprised to hear that. By the way, the girl who was singing with me a minute ago. . .
*black wind howls*
!
That interrupted scream could only mean one thing. . .
Kara: I don't know you. Be gone!
If you ask me, he puts people's behinds on his room walls.
Kara: What do I care if you lose your head?
Soldier: Do you think I have nothing better to do than chase you down?
- Killing demons? Rebelling against your own king? Rape and pillage? RAPE AND PILLAGE!
Kara: Will. I feel as though we've met before as if we were good friends.
- Now it's time for you to meditate on WHY I insist I don't know you
- Edward Castle. . . There's a big viaduct under the castle. Your grandfather designed it.
- What! Really?
There's a prison under the castle. It's built like a maze to keep the prisoners from escaping. I feel bad that I built a prison where people disappear and are never heard from again.
- Enough serious talk Let's eat dinner. I've made a delicious pie. Let's sit at the table upstairs.
But before doing so. . .
Bill: Last night, licorice and rice. Before that, mouse fritters. I can't stand it anymore!
Bill: Sometimes old people, if they're surrounded by problems, get a little forgetful. Maybe there's something bothering her that she can't talk about. . .
Will: I only got one piece but grandpa Bill ate half the pie.
- That night Will dreamed that Kara and he took a trip around the world. . .
*Will feels a little woozy*
Misleading much?
Good ol' Pops.
Lola: Good morning, Will. A letter has com for you from King Edward.
And the letter says: Bring the Crystal Ring from Olman's things to Edward Castle. ~King Edward
Lola: I've been in a bad mood ever since I saw this letter. Oh, Will. I'll teach you a spell. When I'm upset, humming this tune makes me feel better.
Read slowly. Something like "Thhhaaaat'sss prrreeeetyyyy".
Right.
Some people can't keep it to themselves.
You sure you didn't sell it to the Gem man?
You won't even tap that in the Afterlife, old man.
Oh, that's right, we've got the first "item" in our inventory! Let's check that shit out.
Standart inventory. We can store sixteen items at a time, Though I believe we won't use more than eight. And the pillars will play an important part some time in the future.
There you go. Once equipped, you can use it anywhere pressing B. But, since it's a quest item, it'll only react in certain situations, but not too far in the future.
Also, stats. Yup, Lamo. And no levelling system. In contrast to Soul Blazer and Terranigma, you raise your stats by killing all the demons in one room. Style is who you control. Later in the game, you get to take on Will, a man with a flute and a dream, a Knight, a "man" with a big fucking sword and no dreams, and a third form, which we won't be hitting till much much later in the game. Anyway, let's hit the road Jack.
See ya, Barrier.
Ah, the map. You get to move to different locations, but only those you know. Unfortunately, available locations at any time tend to be the ones you should choose to advance the plot, making showing off Mode 7 the whole point in having a map.
TO DA CASTLE! *insert Batman roll*
NEXT UPDATE: The Castle, First dungeon and moar text. Yay!
A.K.A. Illusion of Gaia, Records of the Illusion of Gaia, Gaia Gensōki, and also Come dance with us to the Incan ship.
Our story begins. . .
The mandatory bookworm.
That guy. Probably been too many times "kept after school".
The Brick.
No hitting on me? We must be new at school. Oh well, not much more to do, to the roof!
Lance:
Lance:
Church roofs are so dull. . .hey, one of those funky vitros.
I MUST BREAK YOU
Wait, this is not a vitro. This is not a vitro AT ALL.
Welcome to
OH GOD, IS THAT A MOVING GIANT MULTIPLE-HORNED-GOAT-HITTING-A-WOMAN STONE HEAD? . . .can I take it home?
AH, it talks! KILL IT GODDAMMIT
Back on the Church Roof. . .
FUCK YOU I'M THE CHOSEN ONE AND AS SUCH, I WILL SHOW YOU MY POWER.
NO CHURCH IS HIGH ENOUGH FOR MEEEEE--
Oh, it didn't kill me. Huh.
PROTIP random NPC.
Mirror's Edge, eat your heart out.
"My secrets" sounds like a Naga-ette Bromide of sorts. 50 gems? YOU'RE ON, OLD MAN.
Because weird lit-on-fire gems don't affect Sneak. Oh well, let's explore some more
Town exit.
NPC: DIDN'T YOUR TEACHER WARN YOU NOT to leave town without your parents?
Let's go to shake some hou--
*hit by a pot* Whoa man, watch it!
Seth's mother: I put up with it for Seth's Sake, but if it weren't for him, I'd have left long ago!
Moving on. . .
NPC: Not like mine under this scarf. . .
Middle-Eastern Christians. Way to go, religion.
OP IN DA HOUSE
. . .Outside? What is this outside you're talking about?
I-I can explain, sir. It was ERIK'S FAULT, HE'S ALWAYS WANTING ME TO STICK MY FLUTE IN HIS--
Off to Erik's house
Big house, big shots.
Hipster + Moneybags = My milkshake brings all the boyz to South Cape.
Mah baby's on fi-eee-ire. . .
Better use END as dump sta-eee-ate.
Some kids playing Green light, Red light on the roof make me feel suicidal, all of a sudden. So, I decide it's time to go see mah nigguhs.
Erectile disfunction: Attacking South Cape fishermen since 1994.
Ah, here we are. The gang's hideout.
Lance: I'm playing cards with Seth. Wait a minute.
Erik: The princess of Edward Castle has run away! They say she came to South Cape!
YOUR ROYAL SHENANIGANS DON'T IMPRESS LANCE
Lance: You came in such a hurry that I thought something really big had happened! The princess is probably. that spoiled girl, Kara. . .The one you like so much!
Erik: LIAR! Maybe the soldiers will come here looking for her!
Erik: I want to see Will's mysterious power. You haven't seen it? He can move things without touching them.
Lance: Will. Show me again.
Seth: PROTIP: Face The statue and push the L/R buttons.
So, we proceed to put on a good show
*vacuum sound*
Seth: No matter how many times I see it, I'm still amazed. But why can you move the statue when you can't move anything else. . .?
OH SO MYSTERIOUS.
Lance: I'll put four cards face down. Pick the one you think is the Ace of Diamonds.
*insert Yu-gi-oh abridged bug man joke here*
*drumroll*
Lance: Ahhh! Right!!
Erik: I'm speechless. . .Hey, Seth. This is some type of psychic power, right?
Seth: Yeah, it must be some kind of psychic power thing. If I didn't know better I'd think it was magic. We have five senses, seeing, hearing, taste, smell, and touch. I think Will's psychic power is some kind of sixth sense.
Lance: [INT check failed]What Seth says is too complicated for me to understand.
Using the power of Time Travel, we check and. . .
every card. . .
is the. . .
right one. And I thought I had true psychic powers. I'm just another alchemist. Oh well, play time's over.
. . .you'd probably be in a circus and not playing as an almost irrelevant NPC. Way to go, EriKKKKNGGGHHHH
Let's get outta here
Psychic tutorials are a waste of time. Let's go home and eat some fruitcake.
WHERE'S MAH DINoh hey
When was the last time we had porkchops? C'mere boy!
Hasta la vista, Porky.
. . .should have picked dad's sword and not his fucking FLUTE. Oh well, let's see what grandma can do about this pig.
But then!
Porky gets friendly with my crotch.
Too friendly, in fact. Huh, someone's coming down the stairs.
To be or not to be lunch. That is this pig's question.
Kara: Frankly (Mr. Shankly) you look a little shabby. . . .
Kara: Your father? Mother? Not here, huh?
Kara: I know. Olman, the explorer. They say he was lost.
Will: He'll come back some day.
Kara: Are you sad? . . .No? I'd be sad if it were me. I'm sorry. . .
Kara: Anyway, is there a piano here?
Will: No, there isn't!
Kara: They're singing upstairs now. They have such loud voices!!
And trust people too easily.
*black wind howls*
!
That interrupted scream could only mean one thing. . .
Kara: I don't know you. Be gone!
If you ask me, he puts people's behinds on his room walls.
Kara: What do I care if you lose your head?
Soldier: Do you think I have nothing better to do than chase you down?
Kara: Will. I feel as though we've met before as if we were good friends.
But before doing so. . .
Bill: Last night, licorice and rice. Before that, mouse fritters. I can't stand it anymore!
Bill: Sometimes old people, if they're surrounded by problems, get a little forgetful. Maybe there's something bothering her that she can't talk about. . .
Will: I only got one piece but grandpa Bill ate half the pie.
*Will feels a little woozy*
Misleading much?
Good ol' Pops.
Lola: Good morning, Will. A letter has com for you from King Edward.
And the letter says: Bring the Crystal Ring from Olman's things to Edward Castle. ~King Edward
Lola: I've been in a bad mood ever since I saw this letter. Oh, Will. I'll teach you a spell. When I'm upset, humming this tune makes me feel better.
Read slowly. Something like "Thhhaaaat'sss prrreeeetyyyy".
Right.
Some people can't keep it to themselves.
You sure you didn't sell it to the Gem man?
You won't even tap that in the Afterlife, old man.
Oh, that's right, we've got the first "item" in our inventory! Let's check that shit out.
Standart inventory. We can store sixteen items at a time, Though I believe we won't use more than eight. And the pillars will play an important part some time in the future.
There you go. Once equipped, you can use it anywhere pressing B. But, since it's a quest item, it'll only react in certain situations, but not too far in the future.
Also, stats. Yup, Lamo. And no levelling system. In contrast to Soul Blazer and Terranigma, you raise your stats by killing all the demons in one room. Style is who you control. Later in the game, you get to take on Will, a man with a flute and a dream, a Knight, a "man" with a big fucking sword and no dreams, and a third form, which we won't be hitting till much much later in the game. Anyway, let's hit the road Jack.
See ya, Barrier.
Ah, the map. You get to move to different locations, but only those you know. Unfortunately, available locations at any time tend to be the ones you should choose to advance the plot, making showing off Mode 7 the whole point in having a map.
TO DA CASTLE! *insert Batman roll*
NEXT UPDATE: The Castle, First dungeon and moar text. Yay!