Bumvelcrow
Somewhat interesting
Witness Prosper's creativity within this epic thread on the Obsidian forums:
http://forums.obsidian.net/topic/58357-sorry-i-was-gone-so-long/
There's also a sequel thread, Sorry I was gone so long 2. Seek it yourself.
Thank you - I nearly died laughing. Now I have to die slowly like everyone else, unless I get hit by a very amusing bus.