Note: This is what you should be eating while reading this update:
I bet this will fetch a hefty price on the black market.
Hey, sister Garlena is dead. Does that mean I can loot everything I sold her off her body?
Alright, buddy, you and me, one on one,
mano a mano. Bring it on!
Wow, you're one ugly moth-
This does not bode well.
Summon the what?
Okay...
Well, that was quick.
Death count: 338
Load.
-erfucker...
Wait, what just happened? Did you push the quick load button by accident?
This game does not have that. You just died.
Oh.
Let's see what he says to some pre-buffing.
I won't die so easily now.
I hope you're right.
Not as easy as you... WHAT THE FUCK!
I guess we will need bigger spells than that.
Death count: 339
Loading.
That fucker is cheating! He summoned half of hellish legions back there!
Well, he
is the prince of demons.
I can summon stuff too, and better!
Like this.
Hey... Wait, is this some kind of your BDSM dungeon?
No, why would you... Oh! The chains and dead priests and priestesses! I get it. Well, no, but the idea is good.
And you stand there.
That time stop opener is annoying, but at least Demogorgon is targeting the planetar now.
I can stop time too, see!?
Uh... Why doesn't it work?
I guess he is just immune.
FFS.
Here, have some pierce magics.
And here's a little extra something!
BOOM, fuckers!
I did not sign up for this...
Alright, wish me luck!
...
Good luck.
I guess you're ready for ANOTHER ONE!
OH YEAH! Wait... Magic resistance?
Resist this!
You can start counting seconds until you die!
Wait, are these boobs?
The Codex just cannot into women.
Death count: 340
Reloading.
I got a pretty good look, even through the wall of fire!
Sometimes I really do not know why I even bother with you...
I guess I will summon even more help!
Someone should make an RPG where your party consists of an undead, a flying sword, your doppelganger and your guardian angel. That would subvert more tropes than Planescape: Torment.
Note that I cut casting pierce magic - which we had done twice.
What, you have this spell prepared twice?
Simple death will not save you from doing your job!
I wish I had a bow shooting this spell three times a round.
This might be a good moment to move to attack, seeing as that fucking Marilith is distracted.
How many whirlwind attacks do you need to
change a lightbulb kill a demogorgon?
I guess we'll find out soon!
Have you woken up? Then help out!
Well, it's not like I've been on vacation!
Shit! Better him than me, though.
This is the last one!
Pretty woman, walking down the street, pretty woman...
Chaos. That is bad. Really bad.
It has been a sad day for all of us.
Death Count: 341
Load game.
And it was really close! I think.
Closest so far, for sure.
This time we have decided to try the wilting without lowering Demogorgon's resistances first.
As far as I can recall, it did not work that well.
Ungh. I'm dying!
No problem.
I have a spare you.
Fuck you!
My body is ready.
I know that the spades are the swords of a soldier...
Fucking chaos spell.
Yeah, yeah, yeah...
Death Count: 342
Loading that... Hm...
Let us do this instead.
How do win win here. I'm not seeing it.
I will tell you my idea off-screen. Listen...
[unintelligible whispers]
Yeah, this should work.
That time travel spell is awesome.
OOOOOH! Did that hurt? I bet it did!
Good job tanking there, planetar.
Seriously, we all appreciate it.
The weather is getting pretty crappy, I hope you've brought an umbrella.
Fuck your shit.
Great job, guys! Keep tanking!
I HATE EVERYTHING!
Oh, shut up. You don't see the planetar whining, do you?
I just have nothing to say to you.
Turns out pierce shield is much better than pierce magic. Who would've thought.
Not you, obviously.
NUKE 'EM!
And again!
And now, you die.
Crap. Well, it was a good attempt...
Indeed, it was.
Death Count: 343
Loading that save.
Any more ideas?
Actually, yes.
Ok. I've seen this used a million times.
Let's see how it works.
So, NOW we are going to use the spell I specifically learned for this encounter?
Stop nitpicking.
Let's get that magic resistance down!
Wish me luck.
Yeah, sure.
Alright, let's do this!
Fuck! Not again!
Shit.
Death Count: 344
RE-LOAD-ING.
So, what about that contingency?
I was just going to ask the same thing.
We might as well buff the planetar too. It is not going to help, but there is no reason not to.
And as much as the skeleton warrior is useless, there is no reason not to have it too.
As for the sword, I have no idea why we did not summon it for previous attempts.
I, however, have a pretty good idea.
Ok, this is it, I can feel it!
Pierced!
Breached!
Pierced again!
No, thanks, I prefer to nuke you!
Twice.
It's working!
And here's a little extra something!
Yes!
Ok, let's clean this place up!
Death fog is supposed to insta-kill summoned creatures.
I am not sure they count as those.
They do not...
Codex...?
Codex!?
For fuck's sake NO!
Death Count: 345
L.O.A.D.
I'm not even going to ask if you saved the game.
There was no-
That's why.
If I did it once, I can do it again.
Keep him occupied.
Very funny.
Boobs!
Stay focused.
That pierce shield should have been cast before the wilting.
You want to switch places? Be my guest.
Improved alacrity lets us cast spells so fast, that horrid wilting SFX is still on the screen.
Speaking of horrid wilting...
Good riddance.
Does fire hurt him?
Nope.
Time for a distraction.
I think you're still fucked.
Not if I do this!
Now or never!
Ok, one more try!
And again!
This is not looking good...
Son, I am disappoint.
Death count: 346
Re-load.
Can we just focus on re-creating that successful attempt maybe?
I hate this job!
Some help here?
Working on it.
I need to weaken him first.
Great!
Several times, in fact.
No hurry!
You're doing a great job, by the way.
Shut the fuck up!
Let's do this!
And again!
Nice!
I guess we can't just have a civilized conversation about what just happened?
Your funeral!
Note: we did this to get rid of her stoneskin, but she just renewed it.
We'll have to do this the hard way!
Ping, ping, ping...
Oh, fuck you!
Ah, I forgot about you...
You should have not reminded me.
I'm going to need something better than this!
Maybe just try to kill her one-on-one?
I guess it's worth a shot.
With enough precautions taken...
Ready-aim-
-SPLAT!
Well, that was easier than expected.
And the only loot here is what the priests dropped. What a rip-off.
Just die already.
Good.
My scroll! I guess undead apparitions sent by gods just can't be trusted.
Still, that was a job well done, if I'd say so myself!
Yes, except maybe letting Demogorgon come back to his realm.
Details. Anyway, I feel like I deserve a vacation after that, don't you think?
Agreed. And I know a pretty good spot for that.
Alright! Let's go then!
Next time: The Codex enjoys some well-deserved rest.