flabbyjack
Arcane
Some music to keep you busy: http://www.wimp.com/howdance/ Although it really doesn't set the mood right, unless you like orc-funka-delic
Part H-gahk (8) in which Skullgrinder learns the value of a dollar, eats some cotton candy, and has his first taste of royal flesh.
Bonus: Loading screen art
We resupply in Minas Morgul and the orc-held part of Osgiliath. Osgiliath is clearly overrun and orcs run all over both banks of the river. The humans hold a staunch castle and the siege equipment is all focused elsewhere: Skullgrinder is no general, yet, and has little control over the motions of war.
We encounter a patrol.
"Sharpen doze axez, boyz!"
Orc bros can't hold back their joy, we significantly outnumber the enemy. The only drawback is that we are on the west side of the river, technically this is unfriendly territory.
This map features a small stream and a nice little bridge, too bad it is of piddling tactical value.
The tactical overlay shows our thinly distributed line. I would have liked to perform a pincer maneuver but M&B doesn't support that with only infantry. We will instead do something similar and use our archers to flank the enemy, a tactic that can be used to great effect against Gondor's impregnable shields. Shields can't be used against arrows if the human's flabby torso is in the way.
Despite slashing at a horse's legs at near breakneck speed, the horse keeps on truckin'. These are powerful humie war horses: Not like the drays and draft horses used by caravan guards. Unless we gain some serious strength, it doesn't look like we will be able to 1-shot war horses.
CRAP CRAP CRAP! Skullgrinder has to fall back into the welcome arms of his brethren after brutally pressing the enemy. The archers are ordered to charge as soon as Skullgrinder is in a safe position.
These are not humie caravan guards, but soldiers trained and some are bred for war. There is little comparison between this Gondor patrol and the Gondor caravans.
Skullgrinder rendevous with the archers, who make their way across the bridge.
Despite numerical superiority and archer support, this was a costly battle.
Battle recap: Our standard melee/archer split into a flanking maneuver worked, but the hardy humie soldiers were difficult to down.
We turn in a quest to train some veterans, and receive some much needed praise. 'bout time!
We are able to pick up some uruk chainmail in Minas Morgul.
We meet up with Orc General Gothmog in Minas Morgul.
We have a new dialgoue option with bozz orc!
But he says we need some ridiculously high rank
Taking note of our actions, Gothmog requests our presence in his stack, but we have 20 days to complete this quest, so we wander off toeat cotton candy and wear women's clothes kill some more humans.
"I will drink from your skull!"
We advance in a ragged line, and the humans are upon us before we know it. There is little chance for our archers to press our missile advantage.
A wave of humans rushes into Skullgrinder. Look at all the arrows sticking out of the human's shield on the right... and one sticking into his guts
"Idiot..."
The orcs make short work of the caravan, but not without losses of their own.
After the battle, Bozz Gothmog finally sieges the enemy. We will spend our time puttering around until the siege begins.
Another caravan battle: We split into our standard archer/melee flanking formation, and pray that the enemy does not charge our squishy archer orc bros.
The orc melee stack turns the enemy around even further -- this means that more arrows will strike the back and sides of the enemy.
A constant barrage of arrows wreck the enemy, downing many Rohan horses. This is an especially grievous wound to Rohan, which depends in large part upon their cavalary. While the Rohan line is engaged with the Mordor Wrecking Crew, they are pounded with arrows from a score of orc archer bros. Unfortunately for head badass Skullgrinder, it looks like the remaining cavalry are coming his way. Up goes the shield.
Note that Skullgrinder has a spare shield that can be worn on the back and absorbs stray arrows that would have otherwise buried themselves in his precious lungs.
The flanking maneuver was a huge success, Rohan is a lot squishier than Gondor though.
The warg captain achieves max level and trains his warg to become even fiercer.
A large party of Khan raiders seem to be forming up around a 'Prince' party.
"Royal humie flesh! Letz get 'im, boyz!"
"Hoooowaaaahhhhh!"
200 vs 300 + 100 (Mordor Wrecking Crew). 2 to 1, I like dem odds!
Skullgrinder orders the evil humies to form up around him, but Skullgrinder has no rank in their society and they ignore him, after all, Mordor Wrecking Crew represents only 1/4th of the evil forces.
Although you can't see very well in this picture, the charging cavalry made up a MASSIVE column that descended upon the clump of enemy like a swarm of locusts.
What luck! Orc bros accompany the Khan footmen right into the line of archers. This will be a glorious slaughter!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Enemy reinforcements show up before we can do serious damage to the archers. Where are my allies?!?
Massive enemy incoming! And friendlies nowhere to be seen, we have to reform, FALL BACK!
Damn damn damn damn! Friendly column incoming... need... to... hold... out...
Uruks can't ride wargs, otherwise Skullgrinder would have hopped on this mount and it have been a much more interesting battle.
Skullgrinder charges in with the friendly reinforcements! DEATH OR GLORY!
Skullgrinder tries to rally the orc bros into a meat-wall to stop the constant cavalry charges.
"Uhhh, broz. Were joo go?"
"Whew, close call!"
The battle tide finally puts an end to Skullgrinder.
The cheers of the enemy turn into the gurgling of sea foam as blood fills Skullgrinder's ears.
The End? ...
Up next: We chill at the war camp and drink booze.
Part H-gahk (8) in which Skullgrinder learns the value of a dollar, eats some cotton candy, and has his first taste of royal flesh.
Bonus: Loading screen art
We resupply in Minas Morgul and the orc-held part of Osgiliath. Osgiliath is clearly overrun and orcs run all over both banks of the river. The humans hold a staunch castle and the siege equipment is all focused elsewhere: Skullgrinder is no general, yet, and has little control over the motions of war.
We encounter a patrol.
"Sharpen doze axez, boyz!"
Orc bros can't hold back their joy, we significantly outnumber the enemy. The only drawback is that we are on the west side of the river, technically this is unfriendly territory.
This map features a small stream and a nice little bridge, too bad it is of piddling tactical value.
The tactical overlay shows our thinly distributed line. I would have liked to perform a pincer maneuver but M&B doesn't support that with only infantry. We will instead do something similar and use our archers to flank the enemy, a tactic that can be used to great effect against Gondor's impregnable shields. Shields can't be used against arrows if the human's flabby torso is in the way.
Despite slashing at a horse's legs at near breakneck speed, the horse keeps on truckin'. These are powerful humie war horses: Not like the drays and draft horses used by caravan guards. Unless we gain some serious strength, it doesn't look like we will be able to 1-shot war horses.
CRAP CRAP CRAP! Skullgrinder has to fall back into the welcome arms of his brethren after brutally pressing the enemy. The archers are ordered to charge as soon as Skullgrinder is in a safe position.
These are not humie caravan guards, but soldiers trained and some are bred for war. There is little comparison between this Gondor patrol and the Gondor caravans.
Skullgrinder rendevous with the archers, who make their way across the bridge.
Despite numerical superiority and archer support, this was a costly battle.
Battle recap: Our standard melee/archer split into a flanking maneuver worked, but the hardy humie soldiers were difficult to down.
We turn in a quest to train some veterans, and receive some much needed praise. 'bout time!
We are able to pick up some uruk chainmail in Minas Morgul.
We meet up with Orc General Gothmog in Minas Morgul.
We have a new dialgoue option with bozz orc!
But he says we need some ridiculously high rank
Taking note of our actions, Gothmog requests our presence in his stack, but we have 20 days to complete this quest, so we wander off to
"I will drink from your skull!"
We advance in a ragged line, and the humans are upon us before we know it. There is little chance for our archers to press our missile advantage.
A wave of humans rushes into Skullgrinder. Look at all the arrows sticking out of the human's shield on the right... and one sticking into his guts
"Idiot..."
The orcs make short work of the caravan, but not without losses of their own.
After the battle, Bozz Gothmog finally sieges the enemy. We will spend our time puttering around until the siege begins.
Another caravan battle: We split into our standard archer/melee flanking formation, and pray that the enemy does not charge our squishy archer orc bros.
The orc melee stack turns the enemy around even further -- this means that more arrows will strike the back and sides of the enemy.
A constant barrage of arrows wreck the enemy, downing many Rohan horses. This is an especially grievous wound to Rohan, which depends in large part upon their cavalary. While the Rohan line is engaged with the Mordor Wrecking Crew, they are pounded with arrows from a score of orc archer bros. Unfortunately for head badass Skullgrinder, it looks like the remaining cavalry are coming his way. Up goes the shield.
Note that Skullgrinder has a spare shield that can be worn on the back and absorbs stray arrows that would have otherwise buried themselves in his precious lungs.
The flanking maneuver was a huge success, Rohan is a lot squishier than Gondor though.
The warg captain achieves max level and trains his warg to become even fiercer.
A large party of Khan raiders seem to be forming up around a 'Prince' party.
"Royal humie flesh! Letz get 'im, boyz!"
"Hoooowaaaahhhhh!"
200 vs 300 + 100 (Mordor Wrecking Crew). 2 to 1, I like dem odds!
Skullgrinder orders the evil humies to form up around him, but Skullgrinder has no rank in their society and they ignore him, after all, Mordor Wrecking Crew represents only 1/4th of the evil forces.
Although you can't see very well in this picture, the charging cavalry made up a MASSIVE column that descended upon the clump of enemy like a swarm of locusts.
What luck! Orc bros accompany the Khan footmen right into the line of archers. This will be a glorious slaughter!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Enemy reinforcements show up before we can do serious damage to the archers. Where are my allies?!?
Massive enemy incoming! And friendlies nowhere to be seen, we have to reform, FALL BACK!
Damn damn damn damn! Friendly column incoming... need... to... hold... out...
Uruks can't ride wargs, otherwise Skullgrinder would have hopped on this mount and it have been a much more interesting battle.
Skullgrinder charges in with the friendly reinforcements! DEATH OR GLORY!
Skullgrinder tries to rally the orc bros into a meat-wall to stop the constant cavalry charges.
"Uhhh, broz. Were joo go?"
"Whew, close call!"
The battle tide finally puts an end to Skullgrinder.
The cheers of the enemy turn into the gurgling of sea foam as blood fills Skullgrinder's ears.
The End? ...
Your companions drag you away from the fighting.
Battle report:
Mordor Wrecking Crew losses: 1 Skullgrinder (wounded), Ufthak the orc tracker (wounded), 1 score orc archers, 2 score heavy orcs,
Ally losses: 160, mostly cavalry
Enemy losses: 125. Unit type indeterminate (Could not properly assess the battle)
Overall, acceptable losses for the crew. Acceptable losses in any mission is total unit count - 1. In this case, however, it's a long drawn out battle and we simply needed to keep the fighting ratio at or above 2:1, so we don't lose ground. We succeeded and will reenter the battle after a short breather...
A fresh stack of Corsairs joins the battle! Nearly 4:1 odds now
This is nothing compared to the cavalry column from the last battle, but it will have to do until we can make it to the front line. Despite his grevious wounds, Skullgrinder is rearing for some revenge!
The enemy sports many horses, our side will need to bunch up to foil their charges. "Stay togethur, joo meatsakz!" That's the end of the battle. Evil outnumbered good by 4 to 1! It was like stomping newbies. We spanked them. Hard. As the crows descended and the sky blackened, the orcs lit their cooking fires. The backdraft caused by Sauron's smoke-and-ash clouds drew the smell of burning flesh deep into the heart of Mordor. Toiling orcs lifted their heads and smelled a familiar scent on the breeze: Spit-roasted humans!
The Khan leader is grateful and offers Skullgrinder his daughter's anus in payment.
The crew re-gears and re-supplies at Minas Morgul, then heads to the siege location for some much needed war-camp action. Siege spots turn into quest hubs, as every Mordor stack shows up to the party (Brotato Mouthy is NOT mobile and will always be at Morrannon).
*waves* "I'll just stay over here and watch the gate"
We get a mission to kill caravans (Nooooooooooo!)
And a courier quest to a location we already had a courier quest to go to
Battle report:
Mordor Wrecking Crew losses: 1 Skullgrinder (wounded), Ufthak the orc tracker (wounded), 1 score orc archers, 2 score heavy orcs,
Ally losses: 160, mostly cavalry
Enemy losses: 125. Unit type indeterminate (Could not properly assess the battle)
Overall, acceptable losses for the crew. Acceptable losses in any mission is total unit count - 1. In this case, however, it's a long drawn out battle and we simply needed to keep the fighting ratio at or above 2:1, so we don't lose ground. We succeeded and will reenter the battle after a short breather...
A fresh stack of Corsairs joins the battle! Nearly 4:1 odds now
This is nothing compared to the cavalry column from the last battle, but it will have to do until we can make it to the front line. Despite his grevious wounds, Skullgrinder is rearing for some revenge!
The enemy sports many horses, our side will need to bunch up to foil their charges. "Stay togethur, joo meatsakz!" That's the end of the battle. Evil outnumbered good by 4 to 1! It was like stomping newbies. We spanked them. Hard. As the crows descended and the sky blackened, the orcs lit their cooking fires. The backdraft caused by Sauron's smoke-and-ash clouds drew the smell of burning flesh deep into the heart of Mordor. Toiling orcs lifted their heads and smelled a familiar scent on the breeze: Spit-roasted humans!
The Khan leader is grateful and offers Skullgrinder his daughter's anus in payment.
The crew re-gears and re-supplies at Minas Morgul, then heads to the siege location for some much needed war-camp action. Siege spots turn into quest hubs, as every Mordor stack shows up to the party (Brotato Mouthy is NOT mobile and will always be at Morrannon).
*waves* "I'll just stay over here and watch the gate"
We get a mission to kill caravans (Nooooooooooo!)
And a courier quest to a location we already had a courier quest to go to
Up next: We chill at the war camp and drink booze.
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