In Progress Let's Observe! The Sims 3 - a CDS tale

[Menckenstein]

Gentleman and indeterminates, welcome to my fabulous Let's Play Observe of THE SIMS 3 AMBITIONS EXPANSION, a CDS tale.

For those not "in the know", CDS is Codex Diversity Squad, a secret Codex splinter group whose strength comes from the diversity of its member base (white men under 50!!!)

Let's begin:

Launched from Steam, time to check in with the CDS bros and ask their opi--AAAHH MY EYES MY EARS

Bad Gamma Mamma Jamma

Back into the game, even on my masterwerk uberPC this game takes six years to load

Here's the world map of one of the two whole cities they let you choose from!

Time to assemble the crew!

I started off by asking for volunteers and picking a few victims to be turned into Sims. Prestigious bros were omitted as only the most dysfunctional and undesirable traits make a Sim interesting, otherwise they do stuff like wash their hands after they wipe their shitty ass.

Robot role call:

Ed123

Hoaxmetal

Bruticis aka Grandpa

Handsome Sexgod LundB

Self Insert

Marko thesoup Kebabitz

And finally rounding out the MAJESTIC Seven

Skyway MetalCraze Seventimes

Family Portrait!

 

[Hoaxmetal]

It begins

 

[Bruticis]

Damn it, I do NOT have receding hair! You nailed the legs though and those socks, it's like you raided my underwear drawer.

 

[Ulminati]

Preticting sausage party by page 3

 

[Menckenstein]

Now we've got our group of willing victims ready to go, it's time to pick a house...

...which everyone always tears down

I maximize the space on the tiny lot this prestigious group has purchased

I go through some revisions but the main goal is the same

Be ready for ITZ, diversity style

SHOOTY HOLES

And now a brief overview of each floor

Top floor(3): Lounge areas with minibar, chess sets, fooseball table, drafting table, tattoo machine

2nd floor, I panned out too far, ah well.

The Dormitory: beds, showers, toilets, sinks, dressers in the middle outside the bathrooms

1st floor

Popamole console stations, dining area, kitchen

ITZ Bunker

Treadmills, weight machines, PC stations, laundry machines, toilet stalls, showers.

All in all it's a relatively minimal environment with focus on emotional engagement between majestic persons.

More on that in my next post.

 

[Stereotypical Villain]

Can I be the axe murderer who kills them all in their sleep? Please? PLEASE?!

 

[anus_pounder]

Finally an LP worth following.

 

[MetalCraze]

Where the fuck is Ed's attic?

 

[RK47]

 

[Lindblum]

 

[Hirato]

Did you just cheat yourself 2 million jewgold sims?
Also, pre 1.4 they had this bug which wold make the game crash in certain timezones... Roofles

 

[Fafnir]

 

[TheEntitledOne]

Do you have Pets installed? We need a horse...

 

[Hoaxmetal]

Sadly no, that also means no cat people vs dog fuckers subplot

 

[Menckenstein]

Did you just cheat yourself 2 million jewgold sims?
Also, pre 1.4 they had this bug which wold make the game crash in certain timezones... Roofles

Yes. After Grimoire became the greatest selling entertainment product of all time Cleve issued DNA tests for all Codex residents. Those in the Twinbook ITZ Mansion are those who carry the sacred neanderthal DNA and were given enough funds to let them live comfortably up until the end times.

 

[Menckenstein]

The cage door opens and the biggest fucking retards most prestigious bros begin to explore their new environment and learn about their fellow inmates.

Skyway and Bruticis hit it off immediately, love at first sight!

Hoaxmetal and thesoup have the right idea and head off away from other lifeforms while Ed and Mr. Stein engage in idle banter

Scratch that love at first sight thing

Ed123 uses some kind of Serbian Tupac Rap Majic on Mr. Stein, a sleeping spell?

You can see the look of terror on everyone's face, Ed truly is a powerful wizard

thesoup aka KeBabitz thought he was safe alone on the couch, but the resident sexual predator has other ideas.

...with Ed in tow, like a lost puppy.

Escaping the quiet, rapey environment of the main floor, let us journey upstairs.

The most brojestical of activities becomes a race war, will White Hero LundB prove supremacy over African warlord Skyway?

Spoiler

And what of Hoaxmetal? Well, he's engaging in the most of activities

Just look at the high level of concentration, he must be playing something incredibly deep like RoA or Darklands

Let's take a look at what exactly he's do--

Hoax decides to get some tech support from resident Computer Whiz(tm) Bruticis

"How do I computer?"

Look at these scum, blocking the TV while KeBabitz and LundB are broing it up in Madden NFL EA Sports 2012

"I will show how you computer!"

Latent homosexual thoughts from me, Ed wants to go swimming in the non-existent pool (trying to sell me some DLC EA?!)

Confrontation between Ed and Skyway. EArt begins to imitate life.

Computer Whiz Grandpa Bruticis is all business on the PC, escaping the raucous bullshit upstairs

ASL?
"14/F/Twinbrook"
Send nudez

And if you thought that was unsettling...

Spoiler

All this faggotry can only lead to one thing

Console gaming

If only Grandpa were around, he'd slap the dick out of their mouths.

Then he'd chain them to a PC until t--

"Fuck art!!! PC is all warmed up for you Hoax. I'm here to pop moles"

Well shit, no hope for any of these ones.

Cut to Hoax returning to confront his fears

"I think I can, I think I can, I think I can, I think I can... tickets."

We'll leave him to it.

And back to all that mole popping, wait a minute...

The smell of Grandpa's ointment sends the bros to the another couch, poor Grandpa.

:foreveralone:

Next update? BLADDERMANIA.

 

[Cassidy]

Did you install any loverslab style mod in this shit? Because this thread won't be the same without gratuitous pederasty and scoring jailbait.

And even better, a household appliance for changing gender. Definitively needed itt if modders did one.

 

[Bruticis]

I like the direction this is going. Ed seems so studious, taking mental notes in regard to who will be his first skin suit.

 

[Lindblum]

Do you have that story progression Mod?

 

[MetalCraze]

It modeled my CDS relations with Bruti quite well

 

[Hoaxmetal]

Where's the update?

 

[LundB]

This LP is incredibly unsettling, and is a perfect example of the sort of circle-jerking the Playground is known for.

I approve. Give us an update.

Edit: Also, "Inteen 3 Mod:This Mod enables all romance options (woohoo, pregnancy, marriage) across age ranges between Teen, YA, Adult and Elder in Sims 3. Also it will allow user-directed same sex pregnancy." http://lostaccount.wordpress.com/

It also has an abortion clinic mod apparently, though both seem to be hard to find the right versions of, since there was some modderfaggotry. If there are any suitable sims in the neighbourhood (there are sims outside the house, right? I don't really know how the game works), this could have amusing results tho. May not be worth the effort depending on how complicated it is to plug in.

 

[Bruticis]

You sure know a lot about the sims and the mods for someone that "doesn't really know how the game works". What's really going on here?

 

[LundB]

OH SHIT I'VE BEEN FOUND OUT!!!11!

Have I ever shown you a picture of what you would call my 'man-cave', Brut?

 

[Bruticis]

OK, I LOL'd, well played sir.