Welcome back to another episode of Codexia Conquers the Stars!
Last time, we've changed our government to Utopian Paradise (which means lots of sex for our population) and colonized planets in other solar systems.
Now our Empire looks like this:
I've underlined the systems colonized by us. Our Empire is growing! We now own colonies in the Thaneom, Narsillean and Odan systems. And because we have some scalies living on one of our planets, we can colonize volcanic planets (every race has one or more "native planet types" they can live on; continental, swamp and desert can be colonized by everyone, if the colonizing technology is good enough; ice, volcano and ocean only by those races that are adapted to this kind of planet), too.
We've already sent a colony ship to colonize the planet inhabited by Securans, our own race, in yet another different solar system. And we're getting another technology trade offer from the Muunos Mandil, which we refuse because it is too expensive.
The rodent-furry empire, however, makes us a much more appealing offer that we just can't refuse.
A free present! For free! That's really really kind of them. Aaaand - we have encountered a new empire! Yet again an empire of furries. As far as I know, those furries are native to Ice Planets, which means that we should really try to get some of them into our empire.
This happens either by conquering them (which wouldn't be that hard because they're weaker than us) or by immigration. Yes, this game has migration - people living on shitty colonies with a negative happiness level can emigrate to other planets, usually planets belonging to their own empire, but sometimes they even migrate to a different empire. Or maybe we could buy one of their planets if we get filthy rich.
And we also get another offer by the frog-people...
...which we, naturally, refuse. They want to trade us a technology for one of our mining stations. We're not that retarded. Okay, actually it might be a good deal, but I don't feel like giving up one of our resource-sources for a... uhm, I don't even know what technology that is. Probably an energy reactor for ships.
We politely refuse the offer, BUT
they accept our offer for a free trade agreement, which will benefit both of our empires. We'll now earn a little MOAR money because of this treaty.
One of the furry empires makes us a tech-trade offer, too, which is actually a p. good deal and we accept it. Afterwards we offer them a trade agreement - and they accept!
I can already feel the cash flowing in! :jew:
I'll check if we can make trade agreements with our other friends, too...
wait...
fuck
Some of our former friends don't like us anymore because, apparently, they're prudes who don't like constant orgies of sex, food and alcohol. The Zenox realm, formerly our best friends, now have a less friendly attitude towards us because we've switched governments - and they don't like our current form of government.
On the other hand, the Miredean and Karatov empires, with whom we've made trade agreements, like us a lot more because of our new style of government (apparently, they like orgies).
There's also a human empire, and they want to make a trade agreement, too! They like us because they're humans and we're sexy humanoid space chicks. In this game, everyone's a racist and therefore likes empires of their own race much more than empires of other races. Of course, since those guys are humans, we're going to make them our allies later on. They're the best ally we can hope for in our quest to eradicate all furries.
Now we have lots of trade agreements. Well, actually just three, but that's good enough to give us moar moneez. And while we're at it, we can also try to increase our treasury by other means. And what's the best way to earn money? Yes, you guessed right: tourism!
So we'll just check the star-map...
... and look for scenic locations. Every yellow dot shows a scenic location. If we built resort bases there, tourists will come, and we will earn money. Let's check the yellow dot closest to our systems...
A desert moon in the system of Ussos, which gets a scenic bonus for the Rings of Ussos. Planets with nice-looking rings (like our Saturn) give a scenic bonus because they look really fucking cool, and people love stuff that looks really fucking cool.
This is the moon we're going to colonize now. The moon itself has a ring, and the planet it's a satellite of also has a ring! No wonder that thing gets a scenic bonus, that's some trippy shit right there.
Let's open the expansion planner window and... hey, I can't find the moon there. Probably because I'm looking for Ussos and the moon's just named VXsomething. Instead of searching for it in the long list, I can also just right-click the moon and choose "build a colony ship and colonize Moon VT241". Shitty name for a moon that looks this awesome.
We're also notified that one of our colony ships has colonized yet another planet in another system. Which means our empire is growing. Let's check how it compares to the others...
FUCK YES
From almost last to fourth! We're improving. We still suck in all the other categories, but that'll be fixed later when we build an army and go conquering.
To make our feeling of success even sweeter, the Muunos Mandil Confederacy, who was previously kinda pissed off with us, has now accepted a trade agreement!
We're growing more and more influential... this is good, very good.
And the tip of the sweet gelato-iceberg is that the frog-people tell us about some important historical place they've discovered.
Uhm, wait. F2. We've already been told about that place... TWICE! And now they've reminded us of it a third time. Seems that there's something really interesting up there.
Okay. We're going to send an exploration ship to our "northern"most solar system, refuel it on a planet there, and then send it to this interesting place so we can
finally find out what this is all about.
Hahaha lol.
We've encountered another empire of frog-people, and their first diplomatic contact is to tell us about EXACTLY THE SAME PLACE everyone has already told us about yet again.
One of our exploration ships is already on its way there, so there's no reason to worry. Soon we will find out about that great :mystery: mystery!
But while our ship flies there, we're contacted by a bunch of greedy pirates. Usually, pirates charge less than half of that sum as protection fees! We grit our teeth and accept, though. Later on we might forge an alliance with those pirates, which can prove really useful. And we have other things to do right now than to go pirate-hunting.
And, FINALLY:
Investigate base, or leave base alone? WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF QUESTION IS THAT OF COURSE WE WANT TO INVESTIGATE WHY THE FUCK DID WE FLY THERE
Galactic history revealed! While this doesn't give us any direct bonus, I just love this feature of the game. It adds a huge layer of immersion and mystery to exploration. Now that we've got our exploration vessel that far "north", and there are many stars up there, and we still got most of our fuel left, we're gonna explore all of those. Maybe there'll be a really awesome system there, far away from most other civilizations. A good place to colonize, and if it's only for being a backup colony when our main systems get fucked in a war.
Now let's check on that independent colony of Securans...
FFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUU
It has already been colonized by friends of ours! We won't declare war on them cause we have profitable trade going on and they'd kick our asses... but damn! I want that colony for myself!
Let's try to trade for it.
Fuck, it doesn't even appear in the trade screen (this is a question I've always had about games like this, including Civ4: what determines whether a planet/city can be traded or not? It always felt pretty arbitrary to me). We could try buying the other colony they sell, but it's too expensive and we can't afford it.
While raging about this outrageous situation, we're contacted by pirates. They offer us to attack the Zenox, the troll furries who used to be our friends but aren't anymore because they don't like our Orgy Government. Using pirates to attack other empires is a really nice and sneaky way to give them a bit of trouble. They'll never know that it was us who sent the pirates, heh heh heh...
Yes, yes... the attacks will commence immediately... heh heh. Ah, this is beautiful. Checking the diplomacy screen, I notice that the Xenox don't mind our government anymore. Dunno why, but now their relation with us is okay again. We don't care, though. They've trolled us in the past, and now we're going to take revenge by
not removing anything from their inventory sending some pirates into their systems.
I'm pretty sure that they won't ever find out about thi...
Oh. Fuck. Okay, that was a really heavy hit to our relationship with the toll furries. Damnit. So much for "they'll never find out".
All right. It's on, then. We're going to send a spy to sabotage them! Ha-haah!
That's what you get when you... uhm... discover our devious deeds against you! We're also going to do something really, really evil. We're going to send...
...Cleveland Mark Blakemore to incite rebellion in one of their colonies! TAKE THAT BITCHES, TAKE THAT! His constant ramblings about ITZ will surely make those furries annoyed and paranoid enough to start a rebellion.
The other pirate faction, whom we recently paid a protection fee...
... now offer us an alliance for a really cheap price. We're going to accept, of course. With the money we earn, the price they charge is peanuts, and we might benefit from this agreement. Like when we're going to fuck those furry trolls in the ass and decorate our palace with their skins. The queen will surely like a carpet made of Zenox fur.
But I digress. We wanted to explore the F1, which is far away from any civilization.
Oh. Apparently, it's not. It's home to some other shitty alien faction.
Yep, that's going to be our first victim. We'll just send our military fleet there, fuck them up and take all their colonies. Bwahaha, they're one of the weakest empires in the whole galaxy. Easy prey for us. How delightful.
And now I'm going to end this chapter with a nice little cliffhanger. Next time, we're going to fall upon those primitive insects like a hawk on its prey. No wait, make that a Reichsadler. Or a Codexbird.
:rpgnazi:
Phew, this is the largest update yet. Going to take a little break now so I'm not sure whether the next update will come today or tomorrow.