Duke Nukem Forever - Gold

[Darth Roxor]

It's littered with piss-takes that make me smile. There's a douchebag back stage at the talk show who's going all Christian Bale on some guy for ruining his shot. Punching the guy's lights out was every bit as satisfying as the hooker punching in DE:HR. Some kid asked me for my autograph, so I drew a dick and balls in his book. The twins are based on the Olsen twins, which cracked me up. I hope the whole game has these little touches.

I bet you also loved taking a photo of a kid on your throne before you could descend to the batcave

 

[Vaarna_Aarne]

Played it till the Hive today. It's by far the best FPS of the popamole generation. Too bad that's like being king retard. I'll still finish it though, since it's not a bad game.

 

[MetalCraze]

What is the worst FPS of the popamole generation?

Aren't every console crap coming out gets some praise here?


It's quite ironic how XBox360 game reviewers have better taste than some people on the Codex (4/10 average on gamerankings)

 

[Wirdschowerdn]

If cosnole gamers hate a FPS, chances are it's actually good.

 

[Multidirectional]

If cosnole gamers hate a FPS, chances are it's actually good.

Ah, the chances.. Some other chances are it's so shitty that even they can see it. I rarely go full on hate mode on a game, but fuck if this one doesn't deserve it. Even being Duke Nukem fanboy didn't help me in trying to like it.

 

[MetalCraze]

If cosnole gamers hate a FPS, chances are it's actually good.

Because console gamers play different games from PC gamers

 

[KalosKagathos]

Did... did I just see Skyway defend the tastes of console gamers? :shock:

 

[MetalCraze]

I'm not defending tastes of anyone.

Majority on the Codex played and loved Mass Effect, DAO, FO3 and its addon and other games praised by "ololo dumb consoletards" and "you should play the PC-genre game with a gamepad" is heard on the 'Dex more often and often.

Everyone plays console games on the Codex now.

The only difference is that some don't play (or even buy) the crappiest ones with multimillion hype backing them up and then bitch about "consoletards".

 

[Metro]

Not that I like Jim Sterling but this is one of the few times he's been objective giving it a 2/10:

One level in particular takes place in an alien nest where Earth's women are being inseminated by giant penises. The women writhe and moan in a fairly humiliating fashion, and they regularly sob with no small amount of implied misery. In essence, the women look like they're getting raped. In fact, they are. That's the big joke of the level. The aliens are raping the women to create babies. Now, I'm a fan of offensive humor, but the "joke" in this level is so morbidly presented, so dark and downright unsettling, that I simply do not know if Gearbox intends for us to laugh or to throw up. I certainly found I was in danger of doing the latter over the former.

By the time Duke Nukem finally makes a "You're fucked," joke, which he makes in front of two girls who are about to die in the process of getting sexually assaulted, Duke does not come across as cool, witty or likable in the least. He comes across as a vile, callous, thoroughly detestable psychopath.

 

[Jim Cojones]

Jesus Christ, I didn't expect DNF to be that bad. Ridiculously small FOV, forced mouse acceleration, sluggish movement, horrible animations, annoying depth of field effects. Most of the game seems to consist of jokes repeated ad nauseam (mostly about how awesome Duke is) , minigames and moving through a very narrow corridor. Occasionally you meet some enemies who only pretend that they try to hurt you. Feels more like a parody of Duke Nukem 3D than a real game.

 

[CreamyBlood]

Jesus Christ, I didn't expect DNF to be that bad. Ridiculously small FOV, forced mouse acceleration, sluggish movement, horrible animations, annoying depth of field effects.

Just out of curiosity, can you point me to a post 2004 game that isn't like that? Just one.

 

[Renegen]

I guess the funny thing about Duke is that it's today's gaming public that made the game possible. How much crassness do they ask for, how much dumbing down? Watch all of the Let's Play DNF Demos and see how awesome everyone proclaimed the game to be, despite its obvious immaturity even then.

They all thought it was the perfect game for them, just one in a long time of shitty FPS that was going to cater to their needs.

Of course, the joke's on them now, because the game went too far and got extremely low reviews. It's funny that no matter how badly you screw up a game, none of them ever got close to how bad DNF reviewed. It's like a lifetime whore suddenly got up and said "Hey, I have some decency here, this is offensive!".

The game is an unintentional joke of the gaming culture of today. But the best part is some people still love it. If you want to have a few laughs, go ahead and identify the retards around by seeing who enjoys DNF. It's like they didn't get the message from the collective hive that this game shouldn't be enjoyed, despite being exactly designed for them.

 

[grdja]

Dear god this one looks bad. Saw a 20+ minute play segment on youtube... First its monochrome and vomit inducing. Then its really slow, with usual few enemies and terrible player weapons. Sooo much scripted fights and turret and vehicle sections. All aspects of gameplay look terrible.

I'm quite confident that if it came out in '99 with '98 graphics and exact same gameplay it has now it would have been considered a shit and a disgrace.

 

[Catalina]

Not that I like Jim Sterling but this is one of the few times he's been objective giving it a 2/10:

One level in particular takes place in an alien nest where Earth's women are being inseminated by giant penises. The women writhe and moan in a fairly humiliating fashion, and they regularly sob with no small amount of implied misery. In essence, the women look like they're getting raped. In fact, they are. That's the big joke of the level. The aliens are raping the women to create babies. Now, I'm a fan of offensive humor, but the "joke" in this level is so morbidly presented, so dark and downright unsettling, that I simply do not know if Gearbox intends for us to laugh or to throw up. I certainly found I was in danger of doing the latter over the former.

By the time Duke Nukem finally makes a "You're fucked," joke, which he makes in front of two girls who are about to die in the process of getting sexually assaulted, Duke does not come across as cool, witty or likable in the least. He comes across as a vile, callous, thoroughly detestable psychopath.

 

[hoverdog]

Not that I like Jim Sterling but this is one of the few times he's been objective giving it a 2/10:

One level in particular takes place in an alien nest where Earth's women are being inseminated by giant penises. The women writhe and moan in a fairly humiliating fashion, and they regularly sob with no small amount of implied misery. In essence, the women look like they're getting raped. In fact, they are. That's the big joke of the level. The aliens are raping the women to create babies. Now, I'm a fan of offensive humor, but the "joke" in this level is so morbidly presented, so dark and downright unsettling, that I simply do not know if Gearbox intends for us to laugh or to throw up. I certainly found I was in danger of doing the latter over the former.

By the time Duke Nukem finally makes a "You're fucked," joke, which he makes in front of two girls who are about to die in the process of getting sexually assaulted, Duke does not come across as cool, witty or likable in the least. He comes across as a vile, callous, thoroughly detestable psychopath.

 

[sea]

I just recently saw that section of the game. I can appreciate lowbrow humour from time to time, but... god fucking dammit, how the fuck did that even get made without someone saying it was a bad idea? That's not even "tastefully done rape", that's just sick and awful. I thought 3D Realms had at least some standards, but now I have to seriously look back and think if all their earlier games were just blind, dumb luck.

 

[Elzair]

You know, I knew this game would be some consoletard shit, but since I rarely play that stuff (and because, come on, it's Duke Nukem Forever), I still wanted to give it a try, but that game actively does not want me to play it. The cursor is very sluggish, and I am stuck on the first fucking boss. I can reduce it to 0 HP, climb on top of it, and then the game tells me to tap some button repeatedly, but no matter what, I just get tossed off after a second. I have tried it with several keys and even an XBOX 360 controller, and I still cannot get past it. Is the game glitched, or am I just not tapping the buttons fast enough?

 

[Metro]

The funny part is a lot of people are defending the game's quality on the Good Old Games forum. The irony is overwhelming. There are some good posters over there but there are also a lot of people who love console garbage and don't seem to understand the difference between Duke 3D and Duke Forever.

 

[MetalCraze]

What did you expect? Playing good old games like TW2 makes you jaded

 

[torpid]

Not that I like Jim Sterling but this is one of the few times he's been objective giving it a 2/10:

One level in particular takes place in an alien nest where Earth's women are being inseminated by giant penises. The women writhe and moan in a fairly humiliating fashion, and they regularly sob with no small amount of implied misery. In essence, the women look like they're getting raped. In fact, they are. That's the big joke of the level. The aliens are raping the women to create babies. Now, I'm a fan of offensive humor, but the "joke" in this level is so morbidly presented, so dark and downright unsettling, that I simply do not know if Gearbox intends for us to laugh or to throw up. I certainly found I was in danger of doing the latter over the former.

By the time Duke Nukem finally makes a "You're fucked," joke, which he makes in front of two girls who are about to die in the process of getting sexually assaulted, Duke does not come across as cool, witty or likable in the least. He comes across as a vile, callous, thoroughly detestable psychopath.

That reminds me of Fallout 3: trying too hard with the "good ol' trademark humor of the series" and totally missing the point of the game and what made it good in the first place.

 

[xemous]

yeah that joke was shit. the sequel will kickass though duke becomes president in the sequel.

 

[J_C]

I just recently saw that section of the game. I can appreciate lowbrow humour from time to time, but... god fucking dammit, how the fuck did that even get made without someone saying it was a bad idea? That's not even "tastefully done rape", that's just sick and awful. I thought 3D Realms had at least some standards, but now I have to seriously look back and think if all their earlier games were just blind, dumb luck.

I thought that whole place was very funny. There is no rape shown, there are just girls who are trapped in a slimy tentacle or what, and moaning. I don't get what's the big fuss about it. But oh well, I'm probably a sick fuck who realises that it is a just a videogame.

 

[xemous]

"god dammit! you'll pay for killing my women u alien SOB’s!!

 

[Multi-headed Cow]

He should have started masturbating. That's what I was doing, anyway.

 

[xemous]

too extreme perhaps in the sequel