Death lines

[Slylandro]

Most of this is overkill IMO. You should save elaborate death lines only for significant NPCs. Anything more than one (brief) sentence for a regular NPC is a waste at best and probably exasperating at worst. Is death supposed to be an uncommon occurrence for NPCs in AoD? On the other hand, elaborate death lines would be ideal for PC death because it would provide some kind of player compensation for having to reload.

 

[hiciacit]

Needs more ragdoll physics.


Lots of great suggestions already, so I'll just say what I think is most important: keep the descriptions simple and short. I don't mind them being humorous.

 

[Slylandro]

One more thing, some of your original death lines and the ones that follow are good, but they are generic in the sense that they don't reflect anything about AoD itself. Most of them could've been in any RPG. It might make sense to draw off the lore and history of AoD's world. For example, if we were to take a page from Prelude to Darkness' backstory, here might be some deathlines (I made these up, they're not there):

Your axe returns a fellow Child to the Eternal Flame.

Another River folk walks the stairs.

The corpse of the guardian smoulders like a hot slice of meat on a Vangesh grill.

No they're not brilliant and I made them up on the spot but I think you get the idea.

 

[Walks with the Snails]

Yeah, the simple and short descriptions are probably the right way to go. Not to be rude or anything, but the drawn out explanations of bone fragments and blood are reminiscent of erotic fanfiction written by 13-year-old virgins. You've read about it, you've heard about it, you have what you think is enough imagination to fill in the gaps, so you start typing and unconscioiusly punch out the exact same lines you've read that were almost unanimously punched out by others in the exact same boat as you. And everybody else in your group in similar circumstances thinks you're awesome. Again, that's not meant as an insult, just an honest observation. Be content with your ignorance, seriously.

Deaths of key NPC's or the PC might warrant something more detailed, but keep it personal rather than clinical. I'm in living hell at the moment as classes wind down but could probably make some suggestions in a couple of weeks. I'm hardly an expert in the matter but have at least experienced what depressingly quick work one can make of a human being's limbs with a hacksaw and been forced to experiment with different means of bisecting a human head both horizontally and vertically, enough to know splintering a skull into countless shards which hang in the air is somewhat unlikely.

 

[M0RBUS]

The <profession> dies an agonizing death. Not that he really cares now...

PC death:

You finally meat your maker. He's not happy.

 

[crakkie]

Can't you abstract the gender, too?

<pronoun> : {he, she}

<possessive> : {his, her}

<objectofpreposition> : {him, her}

"Your hit punctures the <profession>'s heart, quickly ending <possessive> life"

That would be less tedious than writing deaths for both genders. Your regular hit strings would be "You hit <profession> for <inflicteddamage> points of damage, <possessive> armor absorbed <absorbeddamage> points of damage."

Also, are there any monsters or animals you will be fighting, or just people? If so, how are you handling their death strings? "It"?

 

[Nick]

Can't you abstract the gender, too?

Implemented recently.