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NSFW Best Thread Ever [No SJW-related posts allowed]

Turjan

Arcane
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Mar 31, 2008
Messages
5,047
I can't tell I know much more about the book after reading that review, except that the reviewer didn't like it. It's remarkable how you can write that much without saying anything substantial, except that the book doesn't have anything to do with the FR or D&D and that it sucks. Both of which is probably enough to know for this forum, although it should be obvious from the publication date.
 

LundB

Mistakes were made.
Joined
Jan 2, 2012
Messages
4,160
This "CoD bros" culture is completely alien to me, where I'm from playing video games is automatically linked to being an extreme nerd and manchild.
From what I've heard from friends living back in the Kwa, over there it isn't really a nerd thing or a manchild thing. It's just a series that just about every guy between 10 and late 20s has played at least one game from. It seems to be more in the sports game niche than anything else, completely mainstream.
 

Ninjerk

Arcane
Joined
Jul 10, 2013
Messages
14,323
This "CoD bros" culture is completely alien to me, where I'm from playing video games is automatically linked to being an extreme nerd and manchild.
From what I've heard from friends living back in the Kwa, over there it isn't really a nerd thing or a manchild thing. It's just a series that just about every guy between 10 and late 20s has played at least one game from. It seems to be more in the sports game niche than anything else, completely mainstream.

Yep. :/
 

tuluse

Arcane
Joined
Jul 20, 2008
Messages
11,400
Serpent in the Staglands Divinity: Original Sin Project: Eternity Torment: Tides of Numenera Shadorwun: Hong Kong
For some reason I thought PowerPC came out in the 80s rather than 1992, but 21 years ago is still pretty ancient in the computer world. In 1992, the pentium wouldn't come out until a year later and people were still using Windows 3.0.
X86 came out in the 80s. OMG so old old better drop it.
 

DeepOcean

Arcane
Joined
Nov 8, 2012
Messages
7,396
This "CoD bros" culture is completely alien to me, where I'm from playing video games is automatically linked to being an extreme nerd and manchild.
From what I've heard from friends living back in the Kwa, over there it isn't really a nerd thing or a manchild thing. It's just a series that just about every guy between 10 and late 20s has played at least one game from. It seems to be more in the sports game niche than anything else, completely mainstream.

Yep. :/
How I feel nostalgia for the time where gamming as a whole was considerated a nerdy thing.:(
 

Coriolanus

Learned
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355
Location
Limberry Castle
This "CoD bros" culture is completely alien to me, where I'm from playing video games is automatically linked to being an extreme nerd and manchild.
From what I've heard from friends living back in the Kwa, over there it isn't really a nerd thing or a manchild thing. It's just a series that just about every guy between 10 and late 20s has played at least one game from. It seems to be more in the sports game niche than anything else, completely mainstream.

Yep. :/
How I feel nostalgia for the time where gamming as a whole was considerated a nerdy thing.:(
It's awful, when you pretty much have to keep this hobby secret from everybody except your closest friends or be labeled a weirdo.
 
Joined
Oct 13, 2012
Messages
1,205
Project: Eternity

It can't be worse than the real Baldur's Gate novel.

Fucking Abdel.
Indeed real BG novels are really something:
Abdel Adrian by the time of book was already sellsword for years
Gorion let him out of Candlekeep because he was big and not very bright
As in he couldn't remember his own surname
Gorion gets killed by random thug with crossbow
Abdel forgets Gorion last words day after his death
(his as in gorion)
he then meet Xzar and Montarion
they go to the friendly arms inn
they meet Jaheira and Khalid
Khalid is abusive husband
Abdel is immedietaly attracted to Jaheira
Khalid is macho in that book
Jaheira tries to cheat on khalid with abdel
but he is too stupid and punches her instead
Khalid dies to some random slime
They meet Xan who is warrior in book
Xan dies to spider
Then we get half page long description of that fat laty death in spider forest
half page of gore
Sarevok is wizard in that book
Angelo is enemy of Sarevok
Even thought sarevok is cornered by army he still gets one on one duel with Abdel
oh and Abdel get his hands "history of dead three" in the book
he can't read it so instead he watches pictures

And that is only first one!
 

DeepOcean

Arcane
Joined
Nov 8, 2012
Messages
7,396
This "CoD bros" culture is completely alien to me, where I'm from playing video games is automatically linked to being an extreme nerd and manchild.
From what I've heard from friends living back in the Kwa, over there it isn't really a nerd thing or a manchild thing. It's just a series that just about every guy between 10 and late 20s has played at least one game from. It seems to be more in the sports game niche than anything else, completely mainstream.

Yep. :/
How I feel nostalgia for the time where gamming as a whole was considerated a nerdy thing.:(
It's awful, when you pretty much have to keep this hobby secret from everybody except your closest friends or be labeled a weirdo.
But, at that time, I still had a hobby, now hipsters and dudebros stolen most of it.
 

Machocruz

Arcane
Joined
Jul 7, 2011
Messages
4,388
Location
Hyperborea
Maybe computer games were considered nerdy. But most boys I knew or knew of had an Atari or NES at some point, even the athletes and trouble-makers. Super Mario and Tecmo Bowl were played by all sorts of people. Arcades had an even more diverse crowd.

Never felt any kind of stigma, but then I was able to move between social circles fairly easily. Either sociopath who mimics group behavior, or one of the few truly balanced human beings :smug:
 

JarlFrank

I like Thief THIS much
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Messages
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Location
KA.DINGIR.RA.KI
Steve gets a Kidney but I don't even get a tag.

It can't be worse than the real Baldur's Gate novel.

Fucking Abdel.
Indeed real BG novels are really something:
Abdel Adrian by the time of book was already sellsword for years
Gorion let him out of Candlekeep because he was big and not very bright
As in he couldn't remember his own surname
Gorion gets killed by random thug with crossbow
Abdel forgets Gorion last words day after his death
(his as in gorion)
he then meet Xzar and Montarion
they go to the friendly arms inn
they meet Jaheira and Khalid
Khalid is abusive husband
Abdel is immedietaly attracted to Jaheira
Khalid is macho in that book
Jaheira tries to cheat on khalid with abdel
but he is too stupid and punches her instead
Khalid dies to some random slime
They meet Xan who is warrior in book
Xan dies to spider
Then we get half page long description of that fat laty death in spider forest
half page of gore
Sarevok is wizard in that book
Angelo is enemy of Sarevok
Even thought sarevok is cornered by army he still gets one on one duel with Abdel
oh and Abdel get his hands "history of dead three" in the book
he can't read it so instead he watches pictures

And that is only first one!

Still a better plot than Dragon Age 2.
 

Whisky

The Solution
Joined
Feb 22, 2012
Messages
8,555
Location
Banjoville, British Columbia
Divinity: Original Sin Project: Eternity Torment: Tides of Numenera
The really scary thing is...

I wonder if killing off Khalid and having Jaheira fall in love with the MC in BG2 was inspired from that...

Oh, and apparently Xan manages to survive that spider death and appears in BG2 novel. And Minsc has hair in it. (Actually, it's really funny how the first novel focuses on unpopular characters. I love how the author thought Montaron was a really cool dude.)
 

Infinitron

I post news
Staff Member
Joined
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Messages
97,520
Codex Year of the Donut Serpent in the Staglands Dead State Divinity: Original Sin Project: Eternity Torment: Tides of Numenera Wasteland 2 Shadorwun: Hong Kong Divinity: Original Sin 2 A Beautifully Desolate Campaign Pillars of Eternity 2: Deadfire Pathfinder: Kingmaker Pathfinder: Wrath I'm very into cock and ball torture I helped put crap in Monomyth
Perhaps it was an attempt to portray the "Bhaal genes" as a kind of mental retardation? The child of the God of Murder is a dumb murderous oaf - makes sense.

Honestly it sounds like the author to decided the books would be an experiment in writing a story from the perspective of an INT 3 barbaric oaf character.

Groo_cover_issue1.jpg
 

DalekFlay

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Messages
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New Vegas
Ex-Biowhore Jen Helper explains her thoughts on combat in RPGs in a Kickstarter update for her dead man walking "Ambrov"...

My Thoughts on Combat - Jennifer Hepler
So, first a disclaimer. I am currently a story consultant for Loreful, and if I join the team full time, it will be as lead writer, with no more input into the combat design than, say, a character artist or voice actor. (Just as my sole contribution to combat on Dragon Age II was to submit a bug saying the wave fights were tedious.) So, me telling you my thoughts about combat isn’t really any different than the crazy guy in the bar saying, “Now, let me tell you a thing or two about politics…” But people seem to keep harping on some things I said about combat many years ago, or more precisely, things they think I said about combat, so I’m going to set the record straight.

The videogame industry has a serious problem with non-completion of games. Only between about twenty-five and fifty percent of people who buy a game actually play it to the end. (I have much more precise numbers but they are proprietary to Bioware, so I’m going to be vague, but believe me that these numbers are real, even if they don’t represent you and your friends). I’m sure some of those players who don’t finish have external reasons – Xbox red-ring of death… leaving for college… car accident… – but the most frequently cited reasons for not finishing a game, far and away are:

1. Getting “stuck” on a combat the player couldn’t get past.

2. Getting bored with the grind and never picking it back up again.

Non-completion of games is a huge problem. As a game developer and wife of a game developer, and friend of game developers and friend of wives of game developers, I know how hard people work to make these games. It is an effort of hundreds of people working nights and weekends, destroying their health and sacrificing family time and sometimes their marriages in order to get this entertainment into the hands of players. Roughly two-thirds of whom never even finish!

Think about that. If that were the statistic for movies, it would mean that of every couple who walks into a movie theater at least one of them will leave before the end of the movie. In reality, how many movies have you walked out of in your life? And how many games have you left unfinished? What would be seen as a staggering failure in one form of entertainment is accepted as inevitable by ours, but the two most common reasons for abandoning a game are both related to combat and both incredibly easy to fix.

Over the past decade or two, games have already made great strides on number one. Many (possibly most?) games now offer different difficulty levels, and many (most?) of those allow you to change difficulty on the fly. In Bioware games, there are often load screen hints suggesting that if a fight is too difficult, you reduce the difficulty level so you can get through it. But for people already struggling on the lowest difficulty, those hints don’t help, since there is no lower difficulty to bounce to. It seems like an obvious next step to allow a “skip combat” or “press to win” option that players can select when a particular fight is too tough for them. This way, when you buy a game, you will always know that there is a way to complete it and have a satisfying experience regardless of your skill level.

It is ironic to me the backlash that this idea has gotten from hardcore gamers, many of whom are also hardcore anti-DRM protestors. Ultimately, we are making the same case: once you spend your hard-earned money to buy a game, you should be able to play it any way you want. Anti-DRM protestors don’t like being told they have to be always on-line and sometimes endure long queues to play the games they own; many other players and potential players don’t like knowing that they could spend $60 on a game only to be told they’re not allowed to play past the first boss fight.

The second issue is equally simple to resolve. It’s no secret that games have two types of combat – important fun fights and grinding through mooks. The mook combats are there to serve two functions: They let players practice the skills they will need to get through the more important fights and they draw out the play time, allowing the companies to advertise a game as “60+ hours long!” And sometimes they can be fun. But other times, they are a tremendous drag. And in a game with story, there is no reason not to allow players to select at the beginning of the game (or tied to the difficulty level) to have many fewer of these “speed bump” combats. This would also make the games more appealing to audiences for whom the idea of committing 60 hours to something is cause for stress, not joy. As players get older and have jobs and families and outside commitments, it becomes increasingly important to make sure that games give the most bang for their buck not only for the people who measure “dollars per hour of fun” but for the people who measure “can I have fun with this in the one free hour I have a month?”

The most common objection I hear from other developers about reducing combat in games or making challenging encounters easier to win is “but it’s so satisfying to lose and lose and lose and then finally beat the bastard!” Which is true – there is a rush when you beat an encounter that at first seemed too difficult. But it’s also awfully close to saying “I love beating my head against a wall because it feels so good when it stops.” If you love fights exactly the way they are now, great – that’s what higher difficulty levels are for. But the two thirds of players who never finish most games are obviously not willing or able to get to the triumph – for them, the game is remembered only as frustrating and eventually games in general become too associated with frustration to keep playing.

And for a sequel-driven industry, this is crippling, since low completion rates mean you can’t predict future game sales based on previous ones. Dragon Age II sold fewer copies than Dragon Age: Origins -- but how much was that influenced by lower reviews and some poor word-of-mouth, and how much was from the fact that the vast, vast majority of Origins sales were to people who never finished the first game and had no desire to pick up a sequel? We’ll never know. But we do know that every time the industry has made a move toward making games more open to new players, less challenging, easier to learn and easier to complete, the industry as a whole has grown and thrived.

Our goal on Ambrov X is a 100% completion rate. We want to make a game that is compelling enough that you want to see the ending, short enough that everyone will have time to play it, challenging for those who want it and supportive for those who need it, and that will make sure nothing comes between you and making peace in the galaxy.

GAMES AREN'T MOVIES YOU DUMB BITCH!!! :x
 

tuluse

Arcane
Joined
Jul 20, 2008
Messages
11,400
Serpent in the Staglands Divinity: Original Sin Project: Eternity Torment: Tides of Numenera Shadorwun: Hong Kong
The best part is that she has correctly identified a problem. There are too many boring fights. Her solution is to add a skip button to fights instead of making all fights interesting or allowing alternate gameplay to avoid fights.

Edit:
And for a sequel-driven industry, this is crippling, since low completion rates mean you can’t predict future game sales based on previous ones. Dragon Age II sold fewer copies than Dragon Age: Origins -- but how much was that influenced by lower reviews and some poor word-of-mouth, and how much was from the fact that the vast, vast majority of Origins sales were to people who never finished the first game and had no desire to pick up a sequel? We’ll never know. But we do know that every time the industry has made a move toward making games more open to new players, less challenging, easier to learn and easier to complete, the industry as a whole has grown and thrived.

Oh shit this is priceless. Bioware has made 4 sequels. BG2, DA2, ME2, and ME3. BG2 and ME2 both sold well more than the previous game, while ME3 sold about the same, and DA2 was well short.

Yeah must have been the difficult fights in DA:O. What a disingenuous argument to make.
 
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felipepepe

Codex's Heretic
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Terra da Garoa
No need to get mad, they won't even get funded, the invisible hand of market is showing a very clear middle finger to this kind of ideas and people.
 

Spectacle

Arcane
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Joined
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Messages
8,363
Think about that. If that were the statistic for movies, it would mean that of every couple who walks into a movie theater at least one of them will leave before the end of the movie. In reality, how many movies have you walked out of in your life? And how many games have you left unfinished? What would be seen as a staggering failure in one form of entertainment is accepted as inevitable by ours, but the two most common reasons for abandoning a game are both related to combat and both incredibly easy to fix.

GAMES AREN'T MOVIES YOU DUMB BITCH!!! :x
While I've never walked out of a cinema, there have been many movies I've started watching at home but turned off before they're finished. Hamburger logic is retarded.
 

Infinitron

I post news
Staff Member
Joined
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Messages
97,520
Codex Year of the Donut Serpent in the Staglands Dead State Divinity: Original Sin Project: Eternity Torment: Tides of Numenera Wasteland 2 Shadorwun: Hong Kong Divinity: Original Sin 2 A Beautifully Desolate Campaign Pillars of Eternity 2: Deadfire Pathfinder: Kingmaker Pathfinder: Wrath I'm very into cock and ball torture I helped put crap in Monomyth
And she's saying these things in an update on Kickstarter, a platform which is almost by definition aimed towards enthusiasts, people who like games so much they're willing to pay for them years in advance. Does she even see the irony in this? Probably not.
 

DalekFlay

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Messages
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New Vegas
And she's saying these things in an update on Kickstarter, a platform which is almost by definition aimed towards enthusiasts, people who like games so much they're willing to pay for them years in advance. Does she even see the irony in this? Probably not.

Yes, the very people she is asking money from are the people she considers "others" and not her audience. It's fucking hilarious.
 

Spectacle

Arcane
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Messages
8,363
And she's saying these things in an update on Kickstarter, a platform which is almost by definition aimed towards enthusiasts, people who like games so much they're willing to pay for them years in advance. Does she even see the irony in this? Probably not.
I guess they are desperate and are trolling to stir up a storm of nerdrage. Which they will then portray as an attack on Hepler for being a woman, and induce white knights to pledge for the game.
 

tuluse

Arcane
Joined
Jul 20, 2008
Messages
11,400
Serpent in the Staglands Divinity: Original Sin Project: Eternity Torment: Tides of Numenera Shadorwun: Hong Kong
No need to get mad, they won't even get funded, the invisible hand of market is showing a very clear middle finger to this kind of ideas and people.
Getting mad at Hepler is like getting mad at a 10 year old for not being able to do calculus. She is unable to comprehend of an RPG that has other things besides story and combat.
 
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