I wanted to make sure that I'm not selling TotalBiscuit short when thinking he's a popamole fucktard so I watched a video of him explaining how he picks games for his reviews :
some key points how to make TB play your game:
- send him 300 emails with big red letters saying YOUR GAME KEY IS HERE, CLICK ME, he doesn't have the time to read his e-mails and care about bullshit like what's the game about or something
- name the game something like HOLY SHIT VAMPIRE MARINE SLAYER IN SPACE because he doesn't like choosing the games based on more than 3 seconds glance at the Steam store, it must stand out based on the title already
- he doesn't have time to actually play the games, they better be for one afternoon playthrough or episodic because he can't afford to put any effort into his reviews, that's not what the consumers he's advocating for want
- send the game key to his clique of friends and if he sees them playing it, he might cover it
- he mentions one game put him straight into a combat scenario without a proper tutorial so he alt+F4'd it immediately - NEVER EVER PUT A BARRIER TO ENTRY IN YOUR GAMES, LIKE STUFF THE PLAYER NEEDS TO THINK ABOUT, HE NEEDS TO BE HOOKED ON THE GAME 3 SECONDS MAX FROM CLICKING THE ICON
There's some more, but this is the gist of it.
Remember kids, the edgy grandpa TotalBiscuit is no better than a kotaku writer with a webcamera. What an asshole loser idiot.
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