Tacticular Cancer: We'll have your balls

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Let's play Alpha Brotocol (and Rage together)

Discussion in 'Codex Playground' started by Cassidy, Jun 19, 2010.

  1. Cassidy Arcane

    Cassidy
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    Vault City
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    Moby - EXTREME Ways

    Lolfficial Banal Shit Boring Theme for this thread.

    Index

    Because this thread is and will be filled with heat, for those who don't enjoy reading the drama, the rage, the rants, the praises, the flamebaits, the shameless bumps and inane posts to avoid causing butthurt on people with shitty Internets and everything else Codexia can be expected to comment between each update, here are them:

    1. First Intro Update(Right here in this post)
    2. First Cassidy experience ever with popamole. First Level up.
    3. Talking to NPCs and basic training prior to Saudi Arabia
    4. Muslim Elimination Arcade (Part 1)
    5. Muslim Elimination Arcarde (Part 1 - Continuation)
    6. Sneaking without darkness, without sound and without popamole special abilities.
    7. Will there be any consequences to skipping a mission besides less popamole?
    8. All Roads(and Boss Fights) lead to Rome
    9. == Next Operation: EXTREME Vult ==
    10. This is not Langley, and Xenu is not here
    11. Lots of Big Words in NPC conversations and a Stalking minigame to train some KKKodexers
    12. More tl;dr and NPC conversations that make this feel like an interactive movie
    13. Manor of Epic Rage and frustration
    14. Shifting between popamole and ninja in fail mission, and finding a critical plot revelation.
    15. It's impossible to sneak in the middle of a shootout between two bigger fishes.
    16. Exploring the ruins of good gameplay. Cheese!
    17. The PopamAlamo and the banging of the biatch
    18. Museum vs. Biatch. Which is Better and Why?
    19. All Boss Fights are made in Taiwan


    Inspired by the courage and self-sacrifice of the true patriot DriacKin, and using the best FAQ ever made for this game:

    So here it is. I'll tell the truth. I think this will be a mediocre experience, but unless it equates the shittiness of an Oblivion, I might finish this crap before posting a last update raging and proving that my bros skyway and 1eyedking were completely right and that this legion of fanboys of Obsidian should GTFO of Codex and gb2gamefags and Obsidian Official forums.

    The moment of truth approaches, another flip-flop by faggots who are continually lowering their standards and letting hype cloud their judgments or a so-so game that isn't that crap compared to what else has been released in 2010 but still sucks when analysed by a critical eye? Banal, Shit, Boring or something that could still be fun despite the popamole? This Let's Play might either answer any doubts or generate even more drama and rage about this game.

    I'll post my experiences together with it, so in a way it will be a Let's Play/Review hybrid, but I won't give a rating once and if I bother finishing this game.

    To prove this is real. It starts right now, although I won't go through the gameplay for now, just post the intro of this and comment on it.

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    So first thing I ever do regarding any game is go to the settings and tweak some things

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    The great thing about 360 ports isn't doing Let's Play threads, it's showing everyone online that I did.

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    At least it can be turned off.

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    This is a screenshot based LP so subtitles are needed. With all settings easy, we go for the game itself.

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    I'm reading "Automatic Win", "Even my dog can beat it" and "Easy". Of course, for the sake of delivering a better thread, we'll go with "Easy" instead of the two other options.

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    Either this game has preset skill point distributions or Recruits start without skills to invest, I can't bother checking. But lets see the gameplay right? It has no character creation so far, so we can erase that already. Maybe there is some character development, we shall see.

    Cutscene time

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    Looks like Modern Gayfare all again. Except there are no MIRVs this time.

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    [Perception][Intelligence]A missile and a civilian airplane shown in the same cutscene mean that they will probably meet each other.

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    [Intelligence]The Player Character could be inside that airplane

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    I've seen someone like this guy before... wait

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    He mentions Alpha Protocol to someone who may be the PC and no further explanations are given. Plot hook, cheap, but works. Will the game suck so much that I'll just search for a spoiler-ridden thread to check its ending and its plot instead of playing it? I don't know yet. According to skyway, racofer, 1eyedking, VentilatorofDoom and others it will, according to Obsidian fanboys, it won't.

    Then

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    [Perception]This sounds familiar

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    Someone calls you from the PDA. Welcome tutorial mission.

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    I took to long to go through the only way that should always work and lost the chance to post the first EXTREME SHEPARD in this thread.

    :rage: :codexrage:

    I was expecting worse from this dialogue timer, tbh, but it still sucks. Lets see how it will handle more complex NPC conversations(if there are any because I'm doubtful).

    Then just random blah. That chick is called Mina and wants to help Shepard, or whatever he is called, to get the hell out of there because of something related to forced conditioning and brainwashing that will be made against his will.

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    [Intelligence]He could only be in one place in the world where this sort of thing happens oftenly.

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    Thus options appear on how to deal with the guard. Of course, Ambush sounds like the most EXTREME option so I picked it.

    Veredict of this update: The first impressions aren't very positive, and like in Dreamfail, the barely explained plot can go into total shit yet but it can yet deliver. The basic premise is quite cliché but can be redeemed with a good plot development yet. No idea on what to expect regarding gameplay. No character creation spotted. Dialogue minigame is annoying but isn't the worst thing ever since Oblivion Horse Armor DLC.

    tl;dr does this game suck?

    A:

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    My progressive evaluation of gameplay starts in the next update.
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  2. treave Arcane Patron

    treave
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    Codex 2012
    Looking good there, bro. Hope you elicit some tears and rage but this is at risk of totally derailing into another GRPG Brotocol Royal Rumble within 50 posts. The plot is going to be pretty much cliche all the way to the end, though.
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  3. Jim Cojones Augur

    Jim Cojones
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    Przenajswietsza Rzeczpospolita
  4. spekkio Arcane

    spekkio
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    I approve this thread

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  5. Radisshu Liturgist

    Radisshu
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    The recruit option makes you start without skill points. The other "classes" give you a few skill points to spend, which are pre-allocated depending on the "class" you pick, but can be redistributed. Apparently constantly picking the "recruit" dialouge option in the beginning gives you something like ten more AP to spend.
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  6. sportforredneck Liturgist

    sportforredneck
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    No. Go back to Civ III dammit.
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  7. Alexandros Augur

    Alexandros
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    Well this should be interesting.
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  8. Overweight Manatee Scholar

    Overweight Manatee
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    Other starts give 30 AP worth to spend, but playing Recruit unlocks Veteran which starts out with rank 3 in all skills, or 120 AP. So I'm guessing 90% of people play through on Recruit because lolmetagaming.
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  9. FeelTheRads Arcane Patron

    FeelTheRads
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    What the hell is with that CGI intro? Looks like it's made 10-15 years ago.
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  10. racofer Thread Incliner

    racofer
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    Remember the cutscenes in Warcraft 2? Those were better.
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  11. anus_pounder Arcane

    anus_pounder
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    Lumberjack beard, Aviator sunglasses and a hat are a must.
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  12. DriacKin Arbiter

    DriacKin
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  13. Terror Teats Educated

    Terror Teats
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    The intro is ingame, as far as I can tell. Don't worry, the game is still shit from asselone's asselone.




    Please, continue.
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  14. Monocause Augur

    Monocause
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    True that. The airplane render looked like something from the late-90's, reminded me of M&M 7 intro.

    That's one part of the game that was extremely rushed without a doubt. Strange from a design perspective - usually it's the late parts of the game that are rushed, with the beginning receiving the most polish. Perhaps the reports of the game plot being practically rewritten from scratch late in development are true.
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  15. Flying Spaghetti Monster Arcane

    Flying Spaghetti Monster
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    Yeah, because the middle and end are when the game truly shines. :roll:
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  16. Cassidy Arcane

    Cassidy
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    First experience with POPAMOLE gameplay

    For real, because I never played one of those "OTS camera with cover system action games" before and I think it'll be banal, shit boring and suck, so lets see it.

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    Strafing, as a instant reaction because of having played so many classical FPSes where circle-strafing, strafing from one cover to another in the map and always being on the move coupled with a good aim were the secrets to not lose in the game. The shock would be really great. Regardless, the combat is quite easy, by punching and strafing away from the foe.

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    Surprise buttsex.

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    Presented with the choices between opening the door and breaking it with a kick, we do it the most EXTREME way. Now I see what Vault Dweller was talking about, not even 1 minute of gameplay and the game already presents us with a choice! I am very eager to see how far these choices can go and their consequences of the fact that the door remained intact instead of breaking so we can LARP about that later.

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    There are dozens of doors that are inacessible. Just from knowing the wasted potential in making a level design that so far seems as linear as in a 2d platformer without z-axis exploration...

    :rage:

    But it will change and things will become better later on, or is skyway totally right about this game? Ahem, IMO these faggots who insult skyway are probably totally wrong and thinking everything is banal, shit, boring without playing it because you witnessed the popamole from a gameplay video is the way to go. But for now I'll give them the benefit of doubt.

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    Behold the full glory of Sub-Radiant AI against stealth!

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    Whoever posted that this game's stealth is equal to Thief III's deserves to be shot.

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    It's not like finding ammo is pixel hunting to require that.

    :decline:

    I know Bloodlines had it but at least it depended upon a skill.

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    The enemies are so easy to kill(or knock down unconscious to be more specific in here) that only retards with 360 controllers need to use the cover system to avoid rape in this part. As a FPS veteran I found this trivial, typical Modern Gayfare stuff, except Modern Gayfare is not as easy as this game so far.

    Achievement Unlocked: First Enemy shot down without using Popamole Cover System

    :obviously:

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    Still, the controls are clunky, and even at point-blank shooting, you can still miss even if you aim right against the enemy(Of course, don't be a fag and complain that I didn't take the screenshot right when the crosshair reached the foe, I'm not pausing the game to take screens)

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    Thus, despite aiming correctly at point blank shot

    :codexrage:

    Also they were too lazy to implement a save anywhere feature. Even Oblivion with guns had it, FFS! But again, I bet the game would be way too easy if it was possible to save anywhere.

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    Usually the enemies barely manage to fire at all before being taken down, thus so far the cover thing didn't really prevail. So far I didn't stay several seconds at the same place popping moles. Most of the takedowns have been by the best possible way:

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    Fallout Shelter. Moar liek "Have you seen my father, he looks like a middle-aged guy" amirite?

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    So these are the so complicated cameras. Thief III is really not that different from this game regarding stealth.

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    Kicking doors and asses through the totally linear journey, we reach the bottom floor.

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    Trivial. It is easy to get killed too, but the enemies have been so easy to kill so far that such detail is sort of pointless.

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    Another annoying minigayme.

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    Choices and Consequences.

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    At least this game lacks one retarded feature that most retarded popamole shooters have: Health Regen.

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    Haha

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    Cutscene time! A truck arrives full of hostiles and the game advises for use of the laughable auto-invisibilty stealth mode.

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    Consoletard beacon skill gained!

    Of course, I will never use it during the entirety of this LP

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    Screw stealth, I'll shoot everything...

    There is nothing redeemable or fun about combat so far which is worse than COD4, therefore forget that.

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    Sneaking through the place, safely away from there.

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    Again, pretty easy.

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    Do you like crosswords?

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    Sneaking through the dumb cameras, we get the Alpha Brotocol Dossier and some serious cash.

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    Then suddenly.

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    They mention that they used him as a bait to be captured in this place so he could provide intelligence data for them, or something because I didn't bother paying attention to the conversation.

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    Being defiant is more EXTREME, so be it. Screw the bonus points for picking RECRUIT choices because that is for faggots and retards who fail so much that they'd have difficulty beating this game.

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    Another somewhat familiar face. Ominous. And of course. EXTREME SHEPARD has no patience, only collar grabs ready.

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    Of course. The best choice.

    [Sarcastic][Intelligence][Perception]

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    Thus, finally, first level up

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    Because stealth is so fucking stupid anyway and more of a LARP, we'll go full popamoling to finish this game faster, if I ever bother going to the end here.

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    NOTICE: I'll be using a variant of the CAD Rule for all dialogues in this game.

    And thus this update ends.

    Veredict of this update: The combat system is mediocre, but at least there is no insta-regeneration and so far no glaring examples of respawning enemies + checkpoints that made Modern Gayfare so fail. Game is quite easy, cover system is optional for someone who has enough twitch skills in less critical situations. Obsidian sucks at level design and the minigames are stupid. There are no evidences of existing any choices with consequences, but I'll never really know because all I experienced so far motivates me to never play this game again if I bother finishing it at all. I really don't understand the praises given to it. On the overall it is like eating a hot pocket. It is cheap, but still not complete shit.

    tl;dr does this game suck?

    A:

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    Could it still be fun despite that?

    A:

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    Maybe you'll think of me when you are all alone
    Maybe the one who is waiting for you
    Will prove untrue, then what will you do?

    Maybe you'll sit and sigh, wishing that I were near
    Then maybe you'll ask me to come back again
    And maybe I'll say "Maybe"
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  17. Flying Spaghetti Monster Arcane

    Flying Spaghetti Monster
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    You're truly a BRO
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  18. GarfunkeL Racism Expert

    GarfunkeL
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    Insert clever insult here
    Complaining that tutorial is too easy... :roll: But the difficulty curve is probably going to be way too gentle in any case, so :P
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  19. Darth Roxor Prestigious Gentleman Wielder of the Huegpenis

    Darth Roxor
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    You actually managed to die in the fucking tutorial.

    Good lord, you suck
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  20. SuicideBunny (ノ ゜Д゜)ノ ︵ ┻━┻

    SuicideBunny
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    Serpent in the Staglands Dead State Divinity: Original Sin
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  21. KalosKagathos Prestigious Gentleman Learned

    KalosKagathos
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    As a matter of fact, you'll get to open the mystery door near the end of the game.
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  22. Dragula Learned

    Dragula
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  23. Alexandros Augur

    Alexandros
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    Assault rifles, pistols and Martial Arts is a pretty redundant build, you don't need all three of these skills. Should have picked another one like Sabotage or Technical Aptitude.
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  24. lightbane Augur

    lightbane
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    Achievement unlocked: The game is too hard and you demand to be dumbed down below casual levels.
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  25. Radisshu Liturgist

    Radisshu
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