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Gotta stay here for now. I want to make sure Kalin doesn't oversleep.
*mumbles through his sleep* May a cock gremlin rape your nostrils this night, Grimwulf. Both of them.
... Cock gremlin?
A small gremlin with a yuuuuge cock.
Meanwhile.
*wanders around, searching for something*
Ahhhh, there you are.
Found you at last.
*returns to KKK, deciding on his course of action*
*sigh* I should just talk to them. What can possibly go wrong?
*takes off his mask*
*takes a deep breath of relief, then opens the door*
*notices Bliblablubb* AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
*SHRIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK*
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA, WHAT IS THIS?!
RRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAA, YOUR HAIR IS PINK!!!
FFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK, I HATE YOU ALL, LEMME SLEEEEEEEEEEP!!!
*dogs barking*
Five minutes of screaming, shrieking, barking and swearing later.
See? *takes Bliblablubb's head-tentacle in her own hand* She is gross, but she's not dangerous. Unless you provoke her, that is.
*purr-like popping*
*still breathing heavily*
You are not from the Agency, are you?
I-uhh--
It's ok. I figured this out the moment I met you.
It can wait 'til tomorrow, Cheetah. We all need some rest. Hey, kid! If you don't comply, Baby Blob will mindfuck your brains and turn you into her personal thrall!
*GURGLE*
Now throw your vascular body on that spare bed!
*hides under the blanket, watching Bliblablubb cautiously*
Don't get any ideas, you hear? I don't want to eat you, but I will if I have to. *falls asleep momentarily*
Psst. Hey.
*whispering* Are you talking to me?
If you touch that vodka bottle, I will rip your eye off.
Okay?
I'm watchin' ye. Good night. *literally watching Alex the whole night instead of going to sleep* DAY 4
*yawns* Grimwulf. GRIMWUUULF!
*jumps on his bed* Oh, for fucks sake, Kalin. What now?
Your stupid geyser plan doesn't work. It's FREEZIN' in here!
Well, maybe THAT will make you go outside and WORK for a change!
*psshhh* Hey, littul baby mobster! Does this volcano have a name?
*yawns and moans* Fucking Kalin. *psshhh* Yes, but I cannot recall it.
*psh psh* It's KODEX KOMMUNISTIC KOLONY naw!
Should have guessed.
Grim? You wanna... you know?
Eat, yes. HEY, GET AWAY FROM MY BERRIES, STUPID DOGS!!
*swallow the last berries and scatter*
Goddamit. Out of food. *sigh* Gotta go.
*observing Grimwulf*
What are YOU lookin' at?!
Cheetah, crack this fabulous "investigator". If he doesn't talk, crack him open - I will investigate his insides.
Sure. With pleasure. *creepy smile*
A bit later.
Where is the wood, Kalin?
IN MY PANTS, BITCH! *grabs crotch*
This ain't no laughing matter! We're out of food - all because of your gluttony!
WUT?! The only reason you're not starving right now is because KALIN PROVIDED! Where do you think all those cans of meat and veggies came from, huh? HUH?!
From yo mamma's basement?
*throws his halberd at Grimwulf - it flies to the swamp instead* FFFFFFUUUUUUUUU
Meanwhile.
*stretches and gets up* Good morning.
Who are you people?
A man pretending to be investigator finds his way into an inhabitable mountain chain. Finds a long dead volcano where a group of people settled just recently. He finds that group. Then he pretends to be wood.
I honestly didn't expect to bump into anyone here.
Why the radio calls then?
Just to be sure there's no one around?
Bullshit. *opens a can of meat from her private stash*
*glances at combat knife lying near his bed*
Go on. Give me a reason.
*changes his mind*
Thought so. Now. Where were we? Ah, yes - who the hell are you, Alex?
I-I am not an investigator.
Go on. I don't bite. Usually.
I came here, because... well...
Alright, that does it. *draws her knife* I'm going to start with your left ear.
Wait, WAIT! I WILL TELL YOU EVERYTHING, NO MATTER HOW CRAZY IT WILL BE!!!
I found a dead investigator to the far east of here. He was carrying notes - they are in my backpack!
*rummages through Alexander's backpack* Keep talking, Alex.
I found encrypted coordinates of a certain place of power. I was looking for The Monolith that makes your wishes come true.
Kids these days.
Hey! I'm 35 years old!
You should be ashamed. *reads the notes* Damn. DAMN! *psshhhh* Grimwulf.
*psh psh* Aye?
Turns out the Agency knows of this place. Several investigators have these coordinates on their lists. It's not as secluded as I thought.
What's their deal? There is nothing extraordinary here.
I don't know. Maybe our guest will shed some light? He is harmless, so I decided to let him wander around, but not too far.
I'll keep an eye on him. Over.
Can I have a beer?
Can you kill a deer?
...
Then no. *enters the fridge and guts the bear corpse*
*psh psh* KKK, this is your Kommissar speakin'. If anyone is hungry enough to eat RAW BEAR - be my guest. Over.
You are a weird bunch.
Says a man with pink hair. PINK. HAIR.
Pink was the color of manhood among norse people.
Is it true, Azira?
Sure, why not.
You think I should kill dat boy?
Are you talking to the Gods?
Hmm? GWA HA HAHAHA, gud one.
I like him.
Making friends already, Alex?
Give him a break, Cheetah. The poor fool doesn't know what to do with his life - maybe we can accept him amongst our ranks?
You want me to... stay?
He's fucking with you, Grimwulf. I don't trust him.
*grumbles* You don't trust anyone. *goes away*
THE RED FORGE.
Need wood. Again.
What shall we forge? Swords? Armours? I suggest armours.
Tools, you bloodthirsty illusion. We need tools.
I am not an illusion. I am a ghost person.
Prove it. A real ghost can shut up. Are you able to shut up?
Meanwhile.
Fucking plebs standing on the way of Citizen Kalin.
What's his problem?
Kalin is, how do you call it? SPESHUL.
What was your plan, Alex? The spooky monolith, I get it - what next? You would simply approach it and wish for horny virgins and tons of silver?
Hey! You don't know me!
Men, you are all the same. Primitive and pathetic.
*mumbles to himself* We'll see how you talk after-- *iincoherent*
Meanwhile.
*gnaws on raw meat*
KALIN! Come on, leave something for the dogs!
Look at me. Ain't stressed. Used to this shit. Hardcore as fuck.
You say "I'm okay", but your moustache says "I want to shave myself".
Talking to dogs and ghosts is one thing. Talking to my moustache really crosses the line.
I am your Kommissar, Kalin. I am the one who draws the line.
Very fucking inspiring, Grimwulf.
Don't even think about touching my vodka.
I thought it was Brembo's.
My. Vodka. Mine. MINE. MY VODKA! *walks outside*
Look at me, Kalin. Grimwulf guttin' grim wolf! Geddit?
One day I'm gonna gut Grimdeer too.
One hour later.
Do we have something to eat yet?
RAW BEAR!
Sounds yummy. *eats a chunk of meat voraciously*
Woman, you make me sick. I wouldn't feed that meat to Kalin! He ate it anyway, but still!
*shrugs* What can I say? I like it bloody.
*jumps on the wolf in front of Grimwulf*
AZIRA, you annoying little bastard! GET OFF MY TABLE!
Hmm?
NOT YOU!!! WHAT KIND OF IDIOT NAMED THE DOGS AFTER THE GHOSTS?!
*kisses Grimwulf's cheeck, leaving a bloody trace* See you around.
Hrmpf.
Hommm, a word of advice?
I know how to gut a wolf, keep your advices to yourself.
I mean on pretteh ladeh Murphy?
Cheetah? Make it quick.
Such women do not simply fall in love, Kommissar Grim Wolf. They use love to manipulate people. She is a natural con artist - smart, strong and good-looking.
What would YOU know about good looks?
*appears*
Don't even think about it.
*disappears*
Phew.
Where is Bliblablubb anyway?
Don't know, don't care.
She could become a good builder with time, Grim. She does have a knack for it.
Kommunism built by horror tentacles? No, thanks.
One hour later.
Any progress?
I'm making tools, not seducing your mother! Need more time.
Who's gonna work that brand new stonecutter's bench then?
Why don't you ask your new criminal scum girlfriend? Or that pink-haired fagget? OR WORK IT YOURSELF! JUST LEAVE ME THE FFFUCK ALONE!!
A bit later.
I made a MANLY DECISION to let Alex stay.
I object. He's not honest with us. Not honest with you.
He'll fit right in. Give him a chance - what do we have to lose?
Oh, I don't know - our lives?
May I have a word?
NO!!!
Remind me WHY THE FUCK DO YOU HAVE TO DISCUSS IT HERE?!
Shut up, Kalin.
We should kill him.
I know Combat Hopak.
Woman, be reasonable! You wanted an army? THAT's how you do army! You recruit people!
Made this mistake too many times, Grim - TOO MANY! We only need loyal people!
He WILL become loyal as soon as he gets to know us!
I can also be a janitor.
SHUT UP!
I can see a glowing "I WILL STAB YOU WHILE YOU SLEEP" sign engraved on his forehead! How can you be so blind??
He stays. End of story.
Go to hell, Grim!
YOU go to hell!
Fine!
FINE!
To be continued...
Last update with key choices and stuff is coming up tomorrow. Sorry, tired, gotta sleep.
A sad story of Bliblablubb and Lynx.
*WARGURGLE*
*popping at stupid tree in anger, while FIRING TEH LAZOR AGAIN*
*crawls to the downed lynx to finish him up, but hesitates*
Can Bliblablubb domesticate and train more animals? This region seems rife with them. A tame Timber Wolf or two would be a nice addition to the KKKolony.
Just for the record: I had nothing to do with that blooming love! Sure, I may have set The_Woman to nod and say "yes master" to everything he asks, but it was the KKKommissar who started it, only thinking with his tiny tentacle. Don't blame me.
Just for the record: I had nothing to do with that blooming love! Sure, I may have set The_Woman to nod and say "yes master" to everything he asks, but it was the KKKommissar who started it, only thinking with his tiny tentacle. Don't blame me.
*mumbles to himself incoherently* Not going according to plan... Need to adapt... Problems... Hmm...
*takes a small sip from the bottle and puts it back*
Meanwhile.
The new guy is on you, Kalin.
Whu--?
Teach him to work, fight, and drink - make him a true kommunist! I got no time for this shit.
I ain't no babysitter!
If he fucks up, YOU will be held responsible! I will impose a fine on your bonus every time Alex falls behind the schedule!
WH-- HOW IS IT FAIR?! HEY!!! WHERE DO YOU THINK YOU'RE GOIN'?!
A bit later.
Hard snow, mm?
...
What? You don't talk to me now?
I'm not in the mood. It's safer for you to keep your distance when I'm not in the mood.
Still mad about my decision, I see. Newsflash - KKK is not a democracy! When I give you a right to choose, it's only because I AM WILLING TO DO SO! This time I made a decision myself!
Are you done?
YES.
*goes away in angry silence*
Hrmpf. Women.
*enters the barracks*
You?
Want to know what I think?
You think I'm a silly man-child?
I think that note you carried in your backpack is fabricated.
*startled*
You've had it aaaall planned out. Tough investigator turning into awkward pretender, making us all awww at the poor naive cretin who sincerely believes in Santa. *claps her hands in a slow, theatrical manner* Bravo.
*confused facial expression is barely hiding a faint smile*
*pssshhhh* Tools done.
Knives, hammers, hand saws. No anal candles.
Took you a while, Kalin! Now I can finally set up a food prep station.
Also, need more tools! So pull your thumb outta your ass and get back to work, pronto!
Hatred. That will be the name of my book about KKK.
*approaches Grimwulf* Bimbo is nowhere to be seen. I thought we need all the working hands, as well as tentacles, right here?
She knows her job perfectly well. Don't worry about Bimbo.
Her job?
To secure the area by annihilating wildlife.
Right. Because that's totally our top priority right now.
You haven't seen shit, baby girl. You cannot possibly comprehend the scale of threat they represent.
Who? Squirrels?
YES, damn you! Squirrels too!
Every goddamn squirrel is a part of something bigger! And on top of that primordial pyramid of feral morbidity stands Grimdeer. My ArchNemesis.
This speech makes me wanna drink. I wonder if I could brew ghost vodka?
Boro Boro is doing her best to keep those evil forces at bay.
The ever-vigilant crusader of KKK.
*GURGLE*
Nice. Someone to save me from the evil squirrels. Praise our vegetable savior. *melancholic hurray*
GLORY BE!!!
*ecstatic gurgle-murgle*
A bit later.
Kalin, this is Hatweird - your new apprentice. Hatweird, this is Kalin - your new god.
Umm, it's Hartwig.
From now on you are Pussyfinger! Harry Pussyfinger. Geddit? As in hairy pussy? Heh heh heh heh, that's rich. *returns to the workshop chuckling*
Mr. Grimwulf?
KOMMISSAR Grimwulf!
Kommissar. Right. Is this apprenticeship really necessary?
*comes out of nowhere* Why? Don't feel comfortable being supervised?
I'm very skilled at floor mopping. Kalin seems too busy to supervise me.
Kalin seems too busy? GWAAA HAHAHAHA!!!
Come on, Cheetah - isn't he adorable?
Go butcher your lynx, Grim. I want to have a word with Alex. In private.
*grumbles* Women have no sense of humor.
*tossing her combat knife playfully* Well done, Alex. You've managed to fool everyone, except me.
I really don't understand what do you mean.
Drop it.
*an evil sparkle flashes in his eye for a short moment*
Alexander Hartwig.
Yep. That's my name.
I bet it isn't.
...*long pause* It isn't.
So how should we call you?
*speaks in hissing-like tone* Lizzurd.
*thinks about something for a minute* Welcome to KKK, Lizzurd. You will not like it here, I assure you.
We'll see.
You need to arm yourself, even though you can't be trusted.
I have this *raises AN-94*
It's empty.
How do you know?
*smiles* Lucky guess. There is a KA-BAR and a frag grenade inside the barracks. Be careful not to blow yourself up. *walks away*
*whispers* What a bitch.
A bit later.
Are you ready for some FUN TIME WITH KALIN, Pussyfinger?
Call me Lizzurd.
Blegh. Gross.
Tell me 'bout your sorry self. I wanna know what I'm dealin' with.
What do you want to know?
Any particular hobbies? Alcohol? Brawling? Women?
... Machines.
Fucking nerd. What was your last job?
It was like a decade ago. I used to work for Insten, a small Outlander Union. My job was papers check at local customs.
Fuck me! You are the single most boring person I ever met! Hell, even that son of an orc we we called HELLO FRIEND was more fascinating than you!
What happened to him?
Long story short, we locked ourselves in a bunker facing an approaching horde of hostile warband. We kicked the ugly one outside to draw enemy's attention. Which he totally did.
Meanwhile.
RED ALERT!
HUH-- WHA--
BEHIND YOU!
It's a goddamn SQUIRREL! *draws his MMMASSIVE ARBALEST*
GRIMDEEEER!!! WATCH ME BURN YOUR MESSENGERS IN INFERNAL HELLFIRE! *pulls the trigger, misses*
*sigh* It's a squirrel, Grim. You can just kick her in the nuts.
I'll show ye how a MEN deals with BEAST. *aims*
Burn, motherfucker. Burn. *swoosh*
She's burning alright.
Imagine if this fire spreads and burns down KKK.
A pathetic, but all in all predictable end of Grimwulf Saga.
Cursed beasts never give up.
Meanwhile.
... Then you push it a bit harder, and boom - got yourself a stone block! Now you can use it to crash your own skull in despair!
Yeah, I'm starting to get the hang of it.
Evar did stonecuttin' before?
Nope. But I'm a fast learner, ha ha. Sorry.
Really now? Well, let me chew it down for you. Here in KKK we have three rules. Rule number one: Obey Kalin.
Got it.
Rule number two: OBEY KALIN.
... Got it.
Rule number three: work hard, party hard.
That's basically my motto.
*enters the workshop* Hey, new guy. Kalin tryin' to rape you yet?
Umm, no?
Don't worry. He will.
I have a soft spot for pink hair, you see.
Ha ha. *looking at Grimwulf and Kalin* This is a joke, right?
Do I look like a joker to you?
Have fun, men. I have my own fuckery to deal with.
*goes outside, swearing all the way*
So, Harry. Your magic monolith - how does it work?
You come close to it. You make a wish. Voila.
Was it created by SPACE GODS or sumth?
Yes?
Boy, you really are retarded. *finishes his work*
So, you're gonna do it? Tonight?
Of course.
Whaddya gonna wish for?
It's a secret.
Later that evening.
DONE AND DONE!
Yay, food!
What would you prefer for dinner, Lizzurd men?
Cuisses de Grenouille, please.
You'll get borsch.
Pum purum pum pum *mumbles a weird slavic tune*
*distant SHRIEEEEEEEEEEEEK*
*dogs howling somewhere*
Bergamon's on a rampage. GO GET 'EM GURL!
How did you convince this thing to join your team?
Ice cream, vodka, and my irresistable personality.
I'll never get used to her. And Cheetah. She doesn't like me.
You are a kommunist naw, and thus she cannot hurt you. Babbeh won't let her.
Oh?
Cheetah is mildly mind-controlled.
Ohhhh. *mumbles* Interesting...
Meanwhile.
Step aside, Snow Queen! I'll show you tree cuttin' like you never seen before!
Find your own tree to cut.
What's with the mood? Grimwulf isn't bangin' you enuff?
Fuck off, Kalin.
I mean, you can always use a log--
*throws a knife towards Kalin - it flies near his head and impales a tree behind him*
FUCK! WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?!
Don't. Push. Me.
Blobra's magic ain't workin' anymore?!
I was aiming for that tree. *pulls her knife out of the bark* But one day, when the "magic" is gone, you and I will have a long conversation.
Later that night.
Look at dis shit, Azira! A whole CAULDRON of borsch!
It looks like... sewage.
Hommm... Thankfully I can't smell it.
I bet it smells of sweat, rot, and death.
The smell of GLORY! *buries his face in foul liquid*
I think I'm gonna puke. Can we ghost persons puke?
Now is the time we find out.
*burrrrps*
One hour later.
*walking outside on her own*
Hey!
*irritated* What do you want?
I am the Edgelord of KKK. Nobody has a right to act more vicious than me. Are we clear?
Whatever.
Now. Be a good little criminal and tell me, what the hell makes you so mad?
Kalin, leave me the f-- you know what, fine. It's about Lizzurd.
Here we go again.
I know I'm right - his innocent behaviour is no more than a poor performance. But I need solid evidence to prove it to Grimwulf before it's too late.
I'll keep an eye on him. If I notice something weird - I'll bring it on the table. Until then, drop it.
Did he tell you anything about himself?
Ehh, small talk. Mentioned he used to work at the customs or some shit. And that he likes machines.
Machines...
Yeah, you know. Robots? Fucking anime-raised kids, I swear.
...
Ye goin' to sleep or what?
I'd rather walk a bit longer. Need some time to think.
Well. Watch out for Bimbo's layzoor. Dat ragin' veggie is shootin' without any regard for firend or foe, I swear.
Good night, Kalin.
Yeah, yeah. *walks away*
*utters* Thank you.
Later that night.
*GURGLE! GURGLE! GURG, GURG, GURG!*
*dogs are marching to the rhytm of Bliblablubb's gurgling*
*active explanatory popping to Azira and Lacgirl*
*nod their heads affirmatively*
*crawls into the barracks, head tentacles observing silly humans under her protection*
*caring, somnolent pop-pop*
MAKE YOUR KEY CHOICE
Collective voting
Current agenda: Construction priority
We currently have:
- shitty barracks
- half-arsed workshop
- excuse of a fridge
What should we focus on?
1. Housing. Two options here.
1.1. More or less decent barracks (white) will allow us to make space for dining/meeting/joy room inside the building we currently use as barracks.
1.2. Private houses, because COME ON! Cheetah wants to sleep with Grimwulf (the horror), Bliblablubb needs more space for ACTUAL ELDER THING BED-CHAMER, and even Lizzurd needs his private place to weep and be miserable.
2. Workshop. Gotta set this place with sewing bench (warm clothes), face styling bench for Lizzurd (PINK HAIR, for Christ's sake!), improved blacksmith's forge and more.
3. Security, at least bare necessities. Traps, ballistas and northen wall.
Discussion
Our ESCAPE TUNNEL is more like HEY RAIDURZ WHY DON'T YOU COME IN AND RAPE US TASTEFULLY?! So here is the idea.
To prevent raiders from goin' thru that tunnel (white arrow) we gotta block it somehow. And no, we cannot build shit on top of shallow water. BUTT, we can try to Kalin a chunk of that mountain. Losing support, the tunnel should collapse right on top of the water. It should. I actually don't know. Should we try?
If anybody has other bright ideas on how to deal with that minor inconvenience - shoot.
Personal choices (story flavor mostly)
You can boss Lizzurd around, but he's kinda useless right now. Maybe later, when we set up a proper workshop, you can order new clothes, weapons and other goodies for yourself.
However, if you got anything particular in mind - go ahead. Being your apprentice, he will do what you say.
Will you set Cheetah free?
1. GURGLE
2. GURGLE
Sooo, maybe we shouldn't rush it? I mean, living together is a huge step towards marriage. We ain't got enough alcohol for that! Besides, Grimwulf is kind of a jackass. You were drunk, I get it.
1. Separate beds, separate houses. Baby steps.
2. I want to sleep with my lover!
Gotta make sure nobody finds out, Lizzurd. Keep your plans to yourself. And do what you have to do.
This monolith here? Not your goal.
But others expect you to do something. What will it be?
1. Make a wish. It's real deal, you honestly believe it. (make a wish)
2. Walk around the monolith, pretend to be wishing for something or whatever, then forget about it. Just for the sake of performance.
3. Actually, it is rather peculiar... Investigate the structure.
4. Deconstruct. Destroy. Take it down.
The housing situation seems to be a pretty hefty mood malus on everyone for as you lose for people freezing as they sleep, not being happy with being crammed together for sleeping, not having the right sort of bed and for Cheetah not having some luxurious spot with Grimwulf.
The valiant defenders of the Kolony are skilled at violence and so I'm sure there's no need to bother with basic security features to head off tasteful rape. Build dachas instead!
Edit: Also, if you manage to collapse that tunnel onto the river after Kalin-ing out the granite, won't that also crush the hero of labor who carved out the last chunk?
We should focus on defenses. We really need them. And who knows what me meet?
Personal choice: Rush actions and well defined goals? It is not what they expect from me to do. I should neither walk to the monolith nor ignore it. I should ask for a job nearby... Maybe building a ballista or two on the riverside. So they think I still align to the monolith, while I will have enough time to work on my SCHEME.
Also, if you manage to collapse that tunnel onto the river after Kalin-ing out the granite, won't that also crush the hero of labor who carved out the last chunk?
Does anybody really, honestly care? Alright, here is the GrimExplanation v 2.0:
When we dig this section, it won't cause a full collapse. Only the unsupported tiles (in otherwords, overhead mountain roof that is too far from support) will collapse. If Kalin digs it starting from north sections southwards, he won't be crushed.
Being miserable together is what KKKommunism is all about!
This voice votes for 1.1, a proper barracks where the KKKolonists can socialize about just how miserable they all are.
2. Workshop for warm clothing
Because apparently you puny humans need extra layer of fur to cope with winter, after loosing all the fur you had earlier in your history. Weird species, not very intelligent designed.
Great update, as always! Every time in S1 and S2 when I woted for security, KKKolony was invaded, or destroyed outright. So let's try something different, 1.2! Makes both for mood lift, shenanigans, and additional defensible positions. Workshop is nice, but without proper housing it will take too long to make worm clothing for KKKolonists.
Prioritize workshop and defenses. We cant always count on Bliblablubb lazor, as there are quite a lot of foes in the waves. I'd postpone housing projects until we can defend the colony.
Let them live together when housing project is done. Now, you can just place beds next to each other, so baby steps. Also, remember to pour her more vodka! Wymyn are easier and softer after that. Well, provided that Grimwulf is into warm sex-dolls.
3. Security - This is kolony attempt #3, Humble Servant was right all along! Traps! Turrets! Walls!
2. Workshops - To work for build communism is it's own reward.
Lagole Gon's 1.3 - ^See above. There should be no complaints, why would there be? Unless someone is secretly harbouring western ideals... Of course, glorious leader must have his own house. Not for himself, but for the good of the whole. Grimwulf needs to be fully rested to guide the People with wisdom and enthusiasm. Besides, it reinforces the proper hierarchy. Without strong, clear leadership, the people flounder. The others can never be allowed to forget that the People rule themselves through the Most Person, no ifs no buts!
Workshop sounds like a safe bet. If I remember the mechanics correctly, the first raid is always a single guy, no? So postpone defenses until then. Also try not to lazoor that single guy, for more recruitin.
Someone is pretending to be younger than she really is.
