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Review New generation reviews Oblivion (must see to believe)

Vault Dweller

Commissar, Red Star Studio
Developer
Joined
Jan 7, 2003
Messages
28,024
Tags: Bethesda Softworks; Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion

<b>Warning:</b> The content of the following site may completely erase your intelligence. Parental and viewer discretion is strongly advised.
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An unusual (major understatement) looking site, called <a href=http://www.exetremegamerz.com/>eXetreMe GamerZ</a>, has posted the most idiotic game review I've ever seen in my life, and I've seen some really bad shit. It happened to be a <a href=http://review1.exetremegamerz.com/index.html>review of Oblivion</a>, and I'll post it in full, because it's definitely one of a kind:
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<blockquote>The Elder Scrolls IV:
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Oblivion
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Every once in a while a game arises to the Market, and you just know it's just gonna be a hit. The Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion is one of those games.
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History
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As most Elder Scrolls games you start off as a prisoner. This one is no different. This time however, you are in the capital of Cyrodiil. In fact that is the capital of the whole Empire. Unlike Morrowind, Oblivion allows the player to explore the WHOLE province. In turn this is about 2 and a half times the size of Morrowind. Any real gamer would know that's HUGE.
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AI
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In previous games, nearly EVERYTHING was scripted, but not anymore! Oblivion opens the downs to a whole new Ai system. This allows NPC's to go about a schedule, which may include eating, sleeping and/or ambushing someone or something.
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Appearance
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Since Morrowind came out, there has been no RPG big enough and powerful enough to take its crown. Oblivion has down that in style, with a whole new reworked HUD system, as well as inventory and map.
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The new map is a lot different to what was expected from the old one. This one has a quest marker which will guide you on locations and quests. As well as the new quick travel system. Unlike Morrowind were you walked everywhere. Oblivion has the option that if you've already traveled there, then you have the fast travel option. This is VERY convenient for quest in the far wilderness.
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When I first played Oblivion I though my computer was broken. In a good way, the graphics were magical, the shadows over whelming. The details and expressions on people’s faces were amazing. You have from to , not many games even bother with these things. The detail on smaller objects and weapons is fantastic. Weapons reflect light in this, as well as don't have that stupid glow on them when enchanted.
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Freedom
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One thing that caught my eye while playing was the way NPC's interacted. Once while raiding a carven I overheard two NPC's talking. It went like this -
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"Did you here about Kvatch?" - Orc
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"Yes, its horrible to thing that this kind of thing could happen" - Redguard
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At that time I started to play mind games on the two. Quickly I moved around in the shadows, staying hidden. While the whole time they were saying -
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"Who's there?"
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"Did you hear that?"
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Then I burst out from behind them and sliced the Orc down. The Redguard started to frantically swing his Silver Claymore at me, missing each time. After about 20 seconds he yelled -
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"I'm outta here" and started running surprisingly fast. I quickly drew my bow and took a pot luck shot at his head. Sure enough he collapsed to the floor. As I approached his corpse I saw an arrow sticking from his neck. I checked his corpse and sure enough he had some good loot, so I took it all. But it was too much. I was full but only by a bit. So I got rid of all my arrows. Which I shot one by one into the Redguards back. They have been there for about one month game time now. This shows the great power and memory the game posses.
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You’re Choice
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The customization features of this game are incredible. From the VERY start you get to choose your characters facial features, hair, eye color and even your skin color. No other game on the Market would let you do this. During the game you can customize your character as well. From your armor to clothes to nothing at all (except giant nappy stays on) you get to pick what you wear. NPC's will also talk to you in a better manor if you’re better dressed rather then rags or nothing.
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Future
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Already Bethesda has brought out three official mods. The Horse Armor mod, the Orrery, and the Wizard Tower. These cost about 2$ each but for the content are well worth it. Oblivion also has a Construction set which allows any one to make their own plug-in for the game. Mods can also be easily added into the game through a built-in system, which enables the user to make only certain mods active.
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Conclusion
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Knowing how a game is is hard until you've played it for yourself. Although if your a vivid gamer you will know that Bethesda produces quality games, and if you've played Morrowind you can just tell your gonna get glued. The Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion, 9.7/10 </blockquote>Unbelievable. It's like a trip to a zoo.
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Saint_Proverbius

Administrator
Staff Member
Joined
Jun 16, 2002
Messages
11,475
Location
Behind you.
rev00wer said:
You’re Choice

....

Although if your a vivid gamer you will know that Bethesda produces quality games

Welcome to the 2nd Grade. Now write a game review.

By the way, I should be able to submit this review to the county clerk and get my property tax refunded. They tell me a chunk of it is going for education, after all.

Oblivion has down that in style

You left out the word, syndrome.
 
Joined
Feb 19, 2005
Messages
4,565
Strap Yourselves In Codex+ Now Streaming!
Can somebody please tell Todd Howard that it is acutally pretty lame to write reviews about one's own games?
 

LlamaGod

Cipher
Joined
Oct 21, 2004
Messages
3,095
Location
Yes
The customization features of this game are incredible. From the VERY start you get to choose your characters facial features, hair, eye color and even your skin color. No other game on the Market would let you do this.

silent storm
the sims 2
mount and blade
city of heroes
dark age of camelot

I got rid of all my arrows. Which I shot one by one into the Redguards back. They have been there for about one month game time now. This shows the great power and memory the game posses.

makes sense for a dead body to stay on the city ground for a month.
 

obediah

Erudite
Joined
Jan 31, 2005
Messages
5,051
Vault Dweller said:
An unusual (major understatement) looking site, called <a href=http://www.exetremegamerz.com/>eXetreMe GamerZ</a>, has posted the most idiotic game review I've ever seen in my life, and I've seen some really bad shit.

It's far from the most idiotic review I've ever seen - it talks about gameplay, and you can tell the reviewer played the game a bit, rather than just posting the template that came with the check from zenimax. It even has sections, and a smattering of punctuation and capitalization. Now the reviewer is probably the most idiotic person to start up a game review site ever, but I'm pretty sure he did his idiotic best on the review.
 

Goliath

Arcane
Zionist Agent
Joined
Jul 18, 2004
Messages
17,830
LlamaGod said:
The customization features of this game are incredible. From the VERY start you get to choose your characters facial features, hair, eye color and even your skin color. No other game on the Market would let you do this.

silent storm
the sims 2
mount and blade
city of heroes
dark age of camelot

SimGolf...
 

Drain

Scholar
Joined
May 3, 2005
Messages
215
Location
Here
review said:
When I first played Oblivion I though my computer was broken.
I thought that too until I reduced settings to minimum

review said:
They have been there for about one month game time now. This shows the great power and memory the game posses.
The new criterion of game's awesomeness. Does AoD feature arrows sticking out of an NPC one month after you shot him?
 

Drain

Scholar
Joined
May 3, 2005
Messages
215
Location
Here
LlamaGod said:
I got rid of all my arrows. Which I shot one by one into the Redguards back. They have been there for about one month game time now. This shows the great power and memory the game posses.

makes sense for a dead body to stay on the city ground for a month.
review said:
Once while raiding a carven I overheard two NPC's talking. It went like this -
I presume that carven = cavern
 
Joined
Feb 19, 2005
Messages
4,565
Strap Yourselves In Codex+ Now Streaming!
On the other hand, the guy is propably a 10 year old kid so whe should give him a break ;)
I mean look at the site, its not even a real site. It has no content on it besides that review and 1 or 2 links.
Its propably some kid who used Daddie's webspace to be a bit creative. Well yeah, the "review" is moronic but you cant really blame children for being morons ;)
 

kingcomrade

Kingcomrade
Edgy
Joined
Oct 16, 2005
Messages
26,884
Location
Cognitive Elite HQ
You’re Choice

The customization features of this game are incredible. From the VERY start you get to choose your characters facial features, hair, eye color and even your skin color. No other game on the Market would let you do this. During the game you can customize your character as well. From your armor to clothes to nothing at all (except giant nappy stays on) you get to pick what you wear. NPC's will also talk to you in a better manor if you’re better dressed rather then rags or nothing.
:lol: I can't even begin to say how much I love this paragraph, from the retarded spelling to the idea that omg ur caratar can haev leik seven difrent coluouors of hair!!
 

Burning Bridges

Enviado de meu SM-G3502T usando Tapatalk
Joined
Apr 21, 2006
Messages
27,562
Location
Tampon Bay
It's not so hard to see that this is no serious review site, but a wannabe who made an ass of himself by starting this site.

- he has one review on his site so far
- his email is Master-of-Oblivion@hotmail.com

We shouldn't make fun about children should we?
 

Spazmo

Erudite
Joined
Nov 9, 2002
Messages
5,752
Location
Monkey Island
Children need to learn about humiliation and shame. They don't get beat up and gangraped on the playground anymore like we all did, so the internet has to make up for it.
 

Hazelnut

Erudite
Joined
Dec 17, 2002
Messages
1,490
Location
UK
Surly i ts a taking of teh poss, write?

Come on who was it?

It cannot be real!!

I won't believe it.

<nah nah nah - I can't hear you>



EDIT - This is surely sig material:

"Knowing how a game is is hard until you've played it for yourself."
 

User was nabbed fit

Guest
AI

In previous games, nearly EVERYTHING was scripted, but not anymore! Oblivion opens the downs to a whole new Ai system. This allows NPC's to go about a schedule, which may include eating, sleeping and/or ambushing someone or something.

This is ironic, because Retarded AI is basically a script of its own. NPCs are 'told' what they can or can't do... they don't really make any decisions of their own. If he wants to eat, you'll have to script your little NPC buddy to eat, same thing for sleeping et cetera... you can't really drop them into the gaming world just like that.
 

Section8

Cipher
Joined
Oct 23, 2002
Messages
4,321
Location
Wardenclyffe
Ah, they had me at "exetreme." Personally, I can't really hold anything against the kid for what he's written. He's probably just thinking "when I grow up I want to review videogames!" And given the content, he's right on track to realising that dream.

But I do harbour animosity toward the technology that permits him to share it with the world. Fucking internet.
 

HardCode

Erudite
Joined
Aug 23, 2005
Messages
1,138
Saint_Proverbius said:
By the way, I should be able to submit this review to the county clerk and get my property tax refunded.

AHAHAHAHAH! Golden ... simply golden!
 

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