Company News Making great games: Bethesda's trade-secrets revealed!

[Vault Dweller]

Tags: Bethesda Softworks; Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion

Todd Howard, everyone's favourite designer, who thinks that reading is too hard and loves the "vibrant and fresh" Final Fantasy series, has finally revealed his trade-secrets in an e-book called <a href=http://www.next-gen.biz/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=3326&Itemid=2>Great games are played by me!</a>, available as an <a href=http://www.elderscrolls.com>Oblivion</a> plug-in for only $2.99.
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<blockquote><b>My favorite part of the working day is...</b>
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I have a few hours in the middle of each day when I play the latest builds of everything. The rest of the time is meetings, some of which I love, some not-so-much. But it’s the private time to play a build and make notes that is probably the most 'fun'. As a project gets further along, <u>those play sessions involve more people at once, watching me play so I can just yell out comments, and those are the best.</u> 'Great games are played, not made', is my office motto, so I love when we’re playing our game and adjusting it as we go.
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</blockquote>The mind boggles
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Thanks, Llyranor
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[Micmu]

9. The game I wish I'd created is...

Chess.

I imagine a 2x2 chessboard with one black and one white pawn... and detailed instructions how to move them.

 

[Astromarine]

not black and white. Not flashy enough. The pawns would be transformer action figures that shot flame from their mouths and had leds all over the place.

 

[Mr. Teatime]

And the board would gradually erode over time!

 

[Astromarine]

and if you managed to upgrade your pawn, your opponent's would be upgraded too

 

[psycojester]

Fallout 3. Another big-open-world RPG

Is anybody else very fucking worried when somebody from Bethesda says that.

 

[hiciacit]

To be honest I don’t read much.

No kidding...

 

[Jed]

To be honest I don’t read much.

No kidding...

Great books are read, not written...



...wait, what the fuck does that even mean?

 

[REX]

'Great games are played, not made', is my office motto.... so hes actually nothing but a gay beta tester whos opinion is ultimate...

 

[Naked_Lunch]

My wife. She will actually duck, even crawl, when she walks in front of the TV and I’m playing a game.

MAKE ME ANOTHER SANDWHICH, YOU WHORE! DAMMIT, MARGE, YOU FUCKING MESSED UP MY SCORE! FUCKING BITCH I SHOULD'VE NEVER MARRIED YOU!!!

 

[GhanBuriGhan]

Fallout 3. Another big-open-world RPG

Is anybody else very fucking worried when somebody from Bethesda says that.

"Fatalistic" would describe the general feeling better I think.

But hope shines eternal, they say...

 

[Thrawn05]

14. In my professional life, the achievement that I'm most proud of is...

Oblivion. I actually still play it and have fun, something that is very hard to do after you create a game.

With a built in walkthrough and no choice in the outcome of any quest, OB has excellent replay value for ADHD kids like Todd.

 

[Drakron]

My wife. She will actually duck, even crawl, when she walks in front of the TV and I’m playing a game.

I am so keeping this so next time I get in trouble ...

 

[bryce777]

Wow. If I were trying to parody this guy I couldn't have come up with somethign so bad.

 

[ad hominem]

Aw, I thought for sure that VD had finally acquiesced and the "Great Games are Played by Me!" link was gonna be a tubgirl.

8. The piece of music that moves me most is...

The Notre Dame Victory March. Having been raised on ND Football, nothing can top a Saturday afternoon in South Bend.

Because I needed another reason to hate Notre Dame.

 

[Red Russian]

...and once I was done programming 'best title screen ever', I would get bored and start a new one...

Yeah, and this was repeated until you were done programming "best graphics evah", and also you would *not* get bored and continue...

...but I also currently suck at it, so that may take a while....

Just don't try and program a *REAL* RPG, 'cause "that may take a while" for someone that has your "experience" in developing "RPGs".

...and the best free museums and zoo you will find...

Too bad your addons isn't free. You want everything for free, yet milk us for shitty addons.

9. The game I wish I'd created is...

Chess.

The AI will probably have that uber-cool Radiant AI of yours. "Noticing" everthing.

11. On the beach, I like to read...

To be honest I don’t read much.

Explains alot.

12. My home is...

Nice. I moved recently, so I could have a better yard for my dog and a room for my new HD TV.

Was that HD TV paid for by our money spent on your exspensive addons? Bloodsucker...

A couple of more addons and you could get a triple garage and a cleaning droid that has your Radiant AI. Walking around aimlessly...

15. And in my personal life, it's...

My wife. She will actually duck, even crawl, when she walks in front of the TV and I’m playing a game. She’s a saint. How I found a woman to put up with me still amazes my family.

How you found *anyone* is beyond me.

 

[bryce777]

"How you found *anyone* is beyond me." A mail order bride was his bonus last year for selling out better than any other year.

 

[Drakron]

Damn it.

Well I am doing it anyway...

<a href="http://www.myforeignbride.com/?ovchn=GGL&ovcpn=global+englishail+Order+Brides&ovcrn=mail+order+bride&ovtac=ppc&gclid=CIWsuKu26YUCFUNFEgodxR-dvg">Here is here he found his wife</a>

 

[Ryuken]

On a positive note, he does want games to be sold cheaper than now. Hmm, probably so they can hurl more plugins to our heads...

 

[Gwendo]

My wife. She will actually duck, even crawl, when she walks in front of the TV and I’m playing a game.

I guess Todd didn't get the hint, from his kinky wife.

 

[Balor]

Hey, is it me, or this article imposes a strong, almost irresistible urge to KILL THAT FUCKER?!
Or, at least, cripple him enough (well, cripple him on physical side, he's already mentally crippled enough) so he'll never participate in making a game again?

About WWII:
"The unnamed soldiers who stormed the beaches of Normandy. Or the ones who parachuted in early. I find D-Day to be an event that I still can’t really comprehend the enormity of."
Oh yea. Guys from USA, aren't you a bit ashamed to have such a guy in your ranks? I mean, he's every bit 'archetypical bloody fucking stupid american'! Yet an other reason to finish him off - so he'll not disgrace your country even more!

D-day, my fat ass. How about him trying to comprehed battle at Stalingrad or Kursk? I'd love to see that. Expecially the bit when his gray (I doubt that it's gray, though - I think it's brown) matter will burst out from his ears.

 

[Gwendo]

"How you found *anyone* is beyond me." A mail order bride was his bonus last year for selling out better than any other year.

Is there a photo of her somewhere? :twisted:

 

[Drakron]

Click my link and all shall be revealed (well sort off ...)

 

[Walkin' Dude]

Hey, is it me, or this article imposes a strong, almost irresistible urge to KILL THAT FUCKER?!
Or, at least, cripple him enough (well, cripple him on physical side, he's already mentally crippled enough) so he'll never participate in making a game again?

Major Blackheart had some better suggestions. I think they live on in Retardoland somewhere. Perhaps someone less lazy will link to the post.

 

[Gwendo]

Click my link and all shall be revealed (well sort off ...)

I've found her! <-- forget it!

Edit: Here's the real deal: