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NSFW Best Thread Ever [No SJW-related posts allowed]

Andyman Messiah

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That's impossible. George Perez overrules all cock.
 

sgc_meltdown

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Andyman Messiah said:
I paid more attention to George Perez than I did to Vault Boy.

Infinity Gauntlet six part series : So good that a horse could like it.

Don't know what he's done after that. If it doesn't involve professionally drawn superhero tits I don't care. :rpgcodex:
 

Jaesun

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http://social.bioware.com/forum said:
I am still holding off judgment until I play the demo. However, after seeing the YouTube videos, I could not help but notice an eerie similarity to another game. I fought for a few moments, and then the title hit me hard.

It feels like a "Mortal Kombat III" rpg.
 

racofer

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Your ignore list.
And MK provided a challenge.

And MK had combos, which required some skill to pull off.

And MK had unique moves for every character, which makes it a hundred times more complex than DA2.

And... it's already obvious, isn't it?
 

hoverdog

dog that is hovering, Wastelands Interactive
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Project: Eternity
Not to mention better, more interesting and diverse (psychologically) characters.
Mortal Kombat was a better RPG than DA2.
 

circ

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Great Pacific Garbage Patch
And to add insult to injury, it had better graphics and animations and varied locations, despite being 20 years old. I'M SORRY BIOWARE, YOU CAN'T USE THE BUT IT'S AN ARCADE EXCUSE. 20 YEARS! And better voice acting.
 

sgc_meltdown

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Messages
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Johnny smirked at Liu. "Really? You're the one that's been hugging me, grabbing my arm, keeping in contact. I mean, I knew you didn't have any personal space issues. But lately, I have to wonder. There you go, staring into my eyes." The actor leaned forward. "It's easy to get the wrong impression."

Lightening struck the ground between them making Liu jump back.

"You're not here, why do you care? Why don't you come down here and tell me what you want, Mr. Won't Give a Proper Kiss?" Johnny glared at the heavens.

There was another flash. Rayden stalked towards the young man. Johnny held his ground. They glared at each other for a long moment. "You were trying to make me angry weren't you?" Rayden snapped.

"Me? Would I do that? Did it work?"

The god seethed. He caught Johnny's chin, then kissed him. There was nothing sweet about it. Harsh, claiming, it left Johnny panting, eyes dazed. "Yes."

"Good."

"I think there's something we need to discuss."

Rayden kissed him again, just to shut him up. They were gone in a flash.

****

When Johnny opened his eyes and saw the familiar room, he had to laugh. "My office suite?"

"There's a perfectly useful bed in the other room. Do you want to talk?"

"Well, I don't know." Rayden kissed him. Johnny's cock hardened. "No." Rayden dropped a hand to settle over where the tattoo was settled. "So you saw?"

"I saw. You know you're mine. I know you're mine. Let's get to that bed and prove it." Johnny pulled off his tee-shirt as he headed for the bed. Rayden stepped up behind him, catching his hands as he worked at his pants. "Let me." Johnny leaned back into the god's warmth. His head leaned back to rest on Rayden's shoulder as the god's fingers quickly loosed his jeans. There was nothing underneath them. Rayden's touch was surprisingly gentle, his fingers warm and soft. He laid a soft kiss to the side of Johnny's bared neck before he bit down. Johnny gasped.

The actor turned. He slid his hands under his lover's shirt and lifted it up and away. Moments later they were both naked. "Finally," Johnny murmured as he ran his hands up the muscled torso. "How did I get you to come down? I have to remember for next time."

Rayden laughed. "Next time, just say something. You're the most closed mouth worshipper."

"I don't worship you."

"Don't you? You've marked yourself for me. You love me?" It was almost hesitant and Johnny smiled.

"Yes, I do."

"You worship me with your body, with your words, with your anger. You're a spitfire, Johnny Cage. Or should I say Carlton?"

"John Carlton's dead," Johnny replied. "Long live Johnny Cage."

"Oh, you will. I'll see to that." Rayden kissed him then. It was as harsh and hot as any kiss Johnny'd ever experienced. He moaned into it. He didn't remember being moved to the bed, only that the comforter was soft and cool against his over-heated skin. Rayden's mouth was moist and warm as it moved down the mortal's chest. He licked the small lightening bolt tattoo and Johnny whimpered a bit.

"Oh, God. Rayden, please, it's been too long for teasing."

One of the squared off fingers rested over Johnny's lips, quieting him. Johnny licked it, suckled the tip of it. He was rewarded by the sharp intake of breath. Rayden was playing with him then, stretching, soothing, lubing. Johnny raised a brow in question, but was perfectly content to feel the sparks of power tickle his tongue as he teased the gentle finger his lips had access to. His hand stroked his cock without conscious thought. It just felt too good, too real, too intense, too everything to think.

Rayden pressed his cock into the tight space of Johnny's body. The pressure and the pain were expected, accepted. Johnny felt a smile on his face as he lifted up and wrapped his legs around Rayden's body. Rayden's hands pinned Johnny's to the bed and the young man's eyes fluttered shut. Finally, his body accepted, relaxed and Rayden started to move, slowly at first, then faster. His mouth fastened over Johnny's, swallowing the cries and half-hearted muttered orders for movement. Lightening flickered across Johnny's skin, tickling him with the promise of power and of pleasure. It seeped into his tissue, his bones, surrounding him. It filled the empty spaces of his body, his soul. He couldn't refuse it, didn't want to. It was Rayden at his most elemental. The driving thrusts of his body were nothing compared to the invasion of his essence. It filled Johnny. It encompassed him. Johnny tried to change the pulse of Rayden's movement, to drive it faster.

The god resisted. His fingers tightened fractionally on Johnny's wrists. He was a god, but he wasn't a peaceful one. He was raw and elemental. Johnny moaned. He pushed against the grip that held him down. This is what he missed when he was alone. He hadn't had a lover to fight in ages. He wanted to beg for more or maybe for mercy, but his mouth was occupied by a hot tongue and sharp teeth at his lips. He came with a kiss-swallowed curse. Rayden joined him. Johnny made a note to ask him if he could always wait like that just before his brain went off line. They ended up in a tangled lump of limbs on the bed. The sparking energy of Rayden's lightening ran over their bodies. They slept.


:obviously::obviously::obviously:

You're welcome Jaesun
 

Jasede

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Insert Title Here RPG Wokedex Codex Year of the Donut I'm very into cock and ball torture
I slept at the bottom of the sea, where no light falls and the silence echoes off the alien creatures. They clung to me like moss, nourishing themselves.

But then I arose and drifted to the surface, and beheld my surorundings.

And I said

"wat"
 

sgc_meltdown

Arcane
Joined
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Messages
6,000
Jasede said:
And I said

"wat"

Too sexy even for you? :oops:



http://www.tesnexus.com/downloads/file.php?id=13275
Bathing Mod

qrkun.jpg

- Adds the need for your Oblivion character to wash regularly.
- Cumulative penalties to the Personality stat for every day your character goes unwashed (or a small bonus to Personality for 24 hours after bathing, based on install options).
- Instantly remove these penalties by washing in bodies of water with soap (purchased from general merchants).
- Purchase placeable bathtubs (11 types available) from general merchants for your player-owned home plugin/s and use them to wash instead.
- Purchase a 'Bathroom Area' upgrade for your vanilla Oblivion player-owned home/s, which includes a bathtub and soap, among other things.

Using the standard installation of the Bathing Mod, your character becomes dirtier and smellier for every day they go without bathing. This manifests as a cumulative penalty to your character's Personality stat. There are seven penalty levels: once you reach seven days without bathing you will not smell any worse as time passes, but you will smell *very* bad - and will receive a significant Personality penalty by that stage.

You can purchase bars of soap from general merchants in Cyrodiil (one is all you will need; they do not run out) and use them to wash; provided you can find a body of water, or a bathtub.

You will need to be swimming in water to use the soap, not just standing in water (this is a scripting limitation). To use the soap, simply click on it in your inventory. If you are swimming in water, you will wash with it, and have any Personality penalties removed within seconds.

To use the placeable bathtubs (or fountains), purchase one from a general merchant in Cyrodiil. Travel to where you wish to place it, and face an open, uncluttered space nearby if you can. In your inventory, shift-click on the bathtub/fountain to drop it. This will drop a wooden 'placer' into the world, which you can move around with the grab key to the desired location. At the moment, the placer can bounce around a bit if you accidentally 'drop-kick' it when first dropping it, so it is recommended to immediately take a couple of steps back when dropping it.

The wooden placer indicates the floor-space the deployed bathtub/fountain will occupy, and has the words 'THIS WAY UP' printed on one side of it. This text should be facing the ceiling, otherwise the bathtub/fountain will deploy upside down. To deploy the bathtub/fountain, simply 'activate' the placer as if you were trying to pick it up. The bathtub/fountain will appear. From now on, if you activate the bathtub/fountain (and are in possession of a bar of soap), you will take a bath. To pick the bathtub/fountain up again and add it to your inventory, activate the bathtub/fountain while in stealthy mode.

It is not recommended to carry one of these bathtubs or fountains with you everywhere: they weigh a *lot*.

To add a bathroom area to your 'My Bravil Home', 'My Bruma Home', etc; just purchase a Bathroom Area Receipt from the same merchant you purchase/d other furniture for the house from. These bathroom areas contain a Copper Bathtub (which you cannot pick up and move around, like the placeable ones), some soap, and a number of other items.


Using the 'bonus, not penalty' version of the mod is the same as the standard version: except your character does not become dirtier over time. Instead, you will gain a bonus to Personality for 24 hours after you bathe.

Using one of the 'A Bloody Mess' compatibility esps with the Bathing Mod will enable your character to wash blood off by taking a bath: unless you are using the Bloodbath or Blood Fountain. Washing in these tubs/fountains will leave your character covered in blood instead.

:hmmm:
 

Jasede

Arcane
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Messages
24,793
Insert Title Here RPG Wokedex Codex Year of the Donut I'm very into cock and ball torture
I've seen enough. We need to reboot. Reboot! Where are extraplanar horrors to end this world when you need them?
 

Jasede

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Patron
Joined
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Messages
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Insert Title Here RPG Wokedex Codex Year of the Donut I'm very into cock and ball torture
sgc_meltdown said:
Jasede said:
Where are extraplanar horrors to end this world when you need them?

i can look for some modron porn if it'll make you feel better

Maybe you can find something about Skaven; I never did back in those days. I thought this was quite admirable; a race of which there was no porn! Certainly unique.
 

DraQ

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Chrząszczyżewoszyce, powiat Łękołody
Coyote said:
Ok, I've read through the thing, at least to the point of being up to date, and you know what? It *is* a furry comic - an incredibly good one. Geology gags were almost a sort of running gag, but what I really liked were hyenas. The way Ursula extrapolated them into intelligent, albeit tribal beings with their own mythology, customs and so on is nothing short of stellar and it's like this thing DraQ was talking about when saying that you can do much more interesting things with 'furries' in fantasy than with your bog-standard lolves and durrves.


The comic is also chock full of bizarre humour, bizarre characters, philosophy and good dose of well-written, not in the least overblown drama.
Poor Ed. :(

Ursula Vernon does indeed rock.
:salute:

All in all, the situation with furries isn't all too different from situation with RPG fans:
you have a lot of fucked up, retarded and extremely shoddy crap including retarded emo kids, furverts and tons of embarassingly bad crayon porn - you have bethtards, perverted biowhores and a whole lot of JPG worshipers.
Then, buried underneath all the manure, you have a handful of people making or interested in good, or at least interesting stuff like Digger and it's author - then you have ITS, Codex and other angry farts bemoaning the decline.
You shouldn't judge the latter on the basis of the former.
 

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