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Crispy™ Let's run rings around Blood Bowl F13 Season 8 - Three Codexers in Play Offs

RK47

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Dead State Divinity: Original Sin
9acf46eba879705e9ff0f3c7a288cb88.jpg

ledisgusting.png
 
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Jaedar

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Project: Eternity Shadorwun: Hong Kong Divinity: Original Sin 2 Pathfinder: Kingmaker
The passive-aggressiveness and faux-gentlemanly posturing is pretty gross.

Also I'm not entirely sure how not wasting time using ingame chat instead of just playing, or giving congratulations over every single touchdown is considered rude in the first place. If anything, such unnecessary and constant 'good job!' just seems insincere or sarcastic.
Yeah I don't get it either. I often engage in the chat, but if the opponent would rather focus on playing you really can't take offense.
 

RK47

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Dead State Divinity: Original Sin
So, the League Commish got online.
vindicated.png


No, sir. You forgot to tell everyone how you blocked me off Steam Friend list without so much of a word, thinking you're going to be awarded the game and I have no case at all.
Disgusting sir.
Much respect to IainC for delivering this decision.
Even if the game cannot be replayed and the game is still awarded to this fine gentleman - I have no regrets - I've already been vindicated. And I need not resort to petty insults to get my points across.

 

RK47

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Dead State Divinity: Original Sin
Anyhoo, since no one is reporting on the Failoff situation (obviously, who cares what's going on there, right?)

Shut up kenny, nobody cares about your fucking FAIL-offs.
 

stabby

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Shut up kenny, nobody cares about your fucking FAIL-offs.

Dawww, am I taking attention away from your itty bitty tantrum drama in the Playoffs again? I'm sowwy:M.

And to prove my sincerity, not only am I going to play my match at a time that won't distrub you, I'll also change my mind and not take screenshots to properly document it for once. We can't have you feeling any less than a special wittle Snowflake, now can we RK~kun.
:love:
 

Jaedar

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Project: Eternity Shadorwun: Hong Kong Divinity: Original Sin 2 Pathfinder: Kingmaker
I care about your fail offs stabby. You'll likely be the only codexer besides me still in the league in a few days :(
 

RK47

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yeah replay ain't happening. final season indeed.
 

RK47

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kenny just played against khornes
i don't really care abt that match.
just sayin'
bitchass.
 
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stabby

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Mild Inebriation, check. Better understanding of events in question, probably. Warhammer 40K Lore Check, failed.

Okay, think I'm ready to do this now *hic*

Failoffs Round 1 - Match Preview
B8AwMnJ.jpg

20090123105543-scout.jpg
Greetings Blood Bowl fans, once again this is some Random Scout, and as always I've been paired with some filthy Xeno Scum.

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Silence degenerate human, we see no pleasure from this pairing either.

20090123105543-scout.jpg
Yes... Well, we have an odd match today as due to unforseen reasons (possibly ending up with someone in the booth getting axed), we'll be giving you coverage of the Daring Believers beyond the typical 'They lost again.'

20090123110441-eldar1.jpg
That's correct viewers, in an odd twist, we'll be watching Coach stabby lead the team against the Muscle Daddies, a Khorne Team led by the veteran Coach drogg. I must say, it is quite the special occassion as the Daring Believers have their backs against the wall, risking being eliminated from the season without a single win to their name, and stabby looks particularly fired up today.

20090123105543-scout.jpg
You must be insane, stabby fired up? A coach who's gone on record as stating they play 'for giggles' and can't take the game that seriously?

20090123110441-eldar1.jpg
I didn't believe it myself at first Scout, but earlier when asked if there was a message for Coach drogg, here's what stabby had to say:
aIGHuwf.jpg

20090123105543-scout.jpg
*Whistles* ... Wow, it looks like the Believers really want to play the halflings next round.

20090123110441-eldar1.jpg
Actually, I think it's more due to a previous comment made by the coach, one which mentioned that stabby would do an LP of Bible Black if the Daring Believers couldn't win a game.

20090123105543-scout.jpg
That would do it. By the way, you filthy bag of flesh, what do we know about the Daring Believers anyway?

20090123110441-eldar1.jpg
Not too much besides the fact they're terrible at this game, I've just been handed their roster. Let me put it up for you:

49td3e6.jpg


20090123105543-scout.jpg
... the hell kind of [BEEP!] moron calls everyone Stan Bush on a team? You know what, nevermind let's just start the damn game.
 
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stabby

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Failoffs Round 1 - Turn the First

Okay, putting the silly commentary aside for a moment, 150K of inducements used for a Keg o'Beer and a bribe. Which may or may not come in mighty handy later. Coin toss comes up...

OQnBbBS.jpg


We choose Tails, we then get told we'll be kicking. Also, discovery that it's snowing is okay because IT'S NOT RAIN FOR ONCE.

Also, yeah. I'm playing with the quest compass on. I don't want that Bloodthirster hiding any sneaky surprises behind him :P

t5O4LAm.jpg


20090123105543-scout.jpg
What a strange defensive formation, do you think it's a trap of some kind?

20090123110441-eldar1.jpg
...

20090123105543-scout.jpg
Emperor forgive me! I forgot we were watching stabby play.

One kick by Stan Bush to the right...
QGF9Yh6.jpg

SV99VVP.jpg


... and we immediately feel the warm smile of Nuffle upon us, and the ball manages to bounce back from the edge of the pitch.

Anyway, the drive starts, and our defensive line works like a charm.

tXNpHWX.jpg

WuboMVk.jpg

o1uNKWB.jpg


... Shit. LOS is already down, meaning there's now a Bloodthirster on a beeline to the nice, squishy...

xzvKP29.jpg

kh6r27A.jpg


Huh. No injury. Whatever, character limit meant I couldn't add 'Never pick up the ball' to his name. Useless Ghoul.

Meanwhile, on the other end of the field:

WBhpPED.jpg


Ball is picked up without any excitement, moving a square to the left, followed by marking players on the sides.

YRQSlN3.jpg


Turn over, now stabby gets to play.

Step One: Raise the dead LOS Zombies. Mr. ST4 will no doubt be working his magic soon.

Step Two: Converge on Bloodthirster for future bashing.

2t1zNhi.jpg


Step Three: Realize you're an idiot that should have blitzed with that Golem w/ block, rather than marked. Then go 'Screw it!' and do a random block with the unskilled Golem.

VYAuXZd.jpg

PO46mI2.jpg


Wow, that'll do.

Hmm, two free werewolves and I've yet to use my blitz. Hey, Mr. Dalton?

2pq6SV0.jpg


*WHOMP*

That leaves the obvious choice for who 'The Touch' gets to blitz, but I seem to keep asking myself "What would the Spanish Inquisition do?"

20090123105543-scout.jpg
What?! The Werewolf is charging the Bloodthirster?!

20090123110441-eldar1.jpg
That's a 1D block with Frenzy, just what is stabby thinking?!

RyZYTE8.jpg


... I'm thinking it's reroll time.

Bj4WCBo.jpg


Ooooo! That works, though an armor break would have been nice. Now we'll just move him up to help out one of the zombies that's surrounded at the moment. Oh sure, part of me wants to show some proper smugness at getting the Bloodthirster down, having great hope Wild Animal will kick in and keep him there (spoiler: No failed WA rolls through the match... ughh), but it would be hollow to use at this point.

If you don't mind, I'm going to take a quick break here, as I've got to bring something up. Not too long ago, a certain coach by the name of RK47 told me that teaching a Zombie 'Dirty Player' on a level up was just oh so stupid, which confused me at the time since he's always going on about how Zombies are excellent fodder to foul with. As fun as it would be to go "Nyaa~" right now and prove him wrong, it would seem that my Dirty Player is actually on the sidelines at the moment. That being said, from a purely logical standpoint at least, I do believe that the knowledge of 'Kick' wouldn't be that far off and amount to the same result in the end.

Anyway, the point I'm trying to make is, well... :M

*CRACK*

GncwhWC.jpg


20090123105543-scout.jpg
By the Emperor, did you hear the sound of that?!

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That's a broken neck if ever I saw one, it looked like he tried to kick the Bloodthirster's head down the field.

20090123105543-scout.jpg
Here comes the Apothecary, and - Yes, he was able to reverse the injury so the player will be back on the pitch for the next drive.

20090123110441-eldar1.jpg
In the meantime though, there goes the Daddies' strength advantage, and since the Believers didn't try to bribe the ref I'm guessing they'll be trying that again the first chance they get.

20090123105543-scout.jpg
My Word! You were right, stabby is playing to win!

... I think I'll be using that smugness troll now.

:martini:
Problem?

Oh yeah, End of Turn 1
 

stabby

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Failoffs Round 1 - Before it Happens...

Turn 2 begins looking like this:

6S1eWN4.jpg


Strength wise, we're about even (mainly due to Horns). Block/Dodge wise, I may be on the short end, but I'm not the one trying to make new plans without a key player.

As it's a little less tied up to the left, the ball starts moving to that side, followed by Mr. Dalton waking up and seeing just how accurate the name 'Never Get Hit*' is.

KEqVrYG.jpg


Not very it would seem, but that's what an asterix is for. Brouhaha on the Right continues with a risky 1D block being thrown.

HP9IKbq.jpg


(yeah yeah, action is under the box. This is like, ESPN26 or something, production values non-existent)

Wow, lucky shot. Unfortunately, that also means that my ST4 Zombie will now be getting a 2D block.

vVWz9Py.jpg


Yup. These die rolls are looking like it's going to settle in to your typical stabby game. *sigh* Still, at least no one is getting inj...

No. I'm not finishing that sentence and jinxing myself.

Moving on, action starts to make its way left a free Herald is sent to assist, followed quickly by one of my players showing just how aptly named he is.

gXL0acS.jpg


Meh, streets, dirt. Same thing. Of course, this is followed by another risky move by drogg, who does his best to show another player who can't live up to his name.

vpoBX0m.jpg


As 'Winner!' goes down, Khorne ends its turn.

Since my camera skills haven't given a look to the right side of the field for a while, I'll say it simply: it's a mess. Everyone's either marked or downed, dodge rolls aren't happening and it's just 1D block city at the moment.

The left is a different story, and since Mr. Ghoul has just woken up from his nap I'm sure I'll find a use for him.

YoKTReG.jpg


That works, Squishy has some use after all, as Stan 'Winner!' Bush gets up, dusts himself off, smacks Rico to the ground before going to mark another Herald.

Oh look, we can finally see the right side of the field again, yippee!

OV2IkG1.jpg


Like I said earlier, all that's happening are some Zombies getting back to their feet. Nothing else is really going to move there. The left on the other hand, that's wide open to allow a little meet & greet between Mr. Wolf and, well, Mr. Werewolf.

mmMlmwJ.jpg


Next moves aren't very spectacular, another zombie gets up and 'POWWWEEEEERRR!' the Golem moves up to mark the last free Herald, followed by the other Werewolf believing in the Internet a little too much, in hopes of making a Wolf sandwich.

eW0LKDe.jpg
THE POWER OF DOGE COMPELS ME!

Txj2FlZ.jpg


He's a little special you see. Still, not the stupidest way I've ended a turn. Let's continue.

Turn 3 begins with a 2D block against the Wight on the Right (again, not seen due to shoddy camera work) thanks to the hyperactive little doggy.

2RWFhqK.jpg


This is then followed by Khorne continuing to keep the Zombie brotha down, this time kind of noticible to the right of the 'Both Down' die (hey! I'm getting better at this!)

RCWSmTP.jpg


Uh-huh. The Daring Believers usual lack of skills is starting to show again. Dammit. Players on the Right are starting to get free, and if this keeps up...

RCWSmTP.jpg


Ohoho, What's this? A reroll being used?

dP2Zpth.jpg


No, wait. First time seeing Juggernaut in action, forgot that Both Down becomes push.

oVfMaCk.jpg


Herald's now free, and runs to the centre of the field... which just happens to be within 2-3 squares of all three of my ST4 players.

Wait, What? (you'll see it in a sec)

This is followed by a Frenzied 1D block against the closer of my Flesh Golems.

ClLbSXd.jpg


Here you can just make out the ball carrier on the edge of the window, and see that I had 'Stand Firm' as optional. Sure, it would have been easy to be moved back and turn it into a 2 Red-die follow up, but I was close enough to the ball carrier to prevent a proper cage. Lucked out as block #2 was also push.

Later, after a greedy use of a reroll...

XSGcMU9.jpg


Not sure if I wasn't the only one who forgot about Juggernaut, or if he thought a Push would hurt his positioning or what. I just like the result.

:codexisfor:

PRj5IZr.jpg


New turn begins, and looking at the field I can see this working in my favour. Meaning I'm probably going to Pooch this all very badly indeed.

Anyway, stabby-Ho Believers!

*some time later*

YLiapma.jpg


Yup. That'll do the trick.
 

Darth Roxor

Royal Dongsmith
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MEANWHILE!!!!

F13 BridgeBurners vs Secret Military Union


BB1523.jpg


FAST FORWARD TO TURN 12

BB1658.jpg


Ok Darth Roxor, be cool, you still have 4 turns to equalize.

BB1659.jpg


And with this genius plan nothing can go ronk!

If the ghoul and golem go left, we can perform a surgical strike on the werewolf with Major Glory on the right, then block the wight from both sides with Glory + General Motors. After that, General Specific can safely hand-off to Major Minor in the middle, who will jolt down the right flank, away from anyone's reach.

BB1660.jpg


Motors is down in a convenient enough position. Ghoul and golem move away. That's our chance!

GO IN MAJOR GLORY!

BB1661.jpg


RED/PUSH VS SIDESTEP WEREWOLF ARE A BIG NONO

RE-ROLL TO KNOCKDOWN!

BB1662.jpg


TAKE THE FUCKING BALL YOU RETARD

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:what:

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Between this and 16/49 successful blocks against a team with only 2 blodgers, I think this is all that needs to be said about this game.

I actually derped many times while playing, particularly when it came to starting setups, but it's really as simple as that. If all your fucking blocks end up with pushes, if the ogre doesn't get a single successful block off while it keeps getting mopped all over the floor by the flesh golems, if the enemy gets constant armour breaks all the fucking time even if they are just stuns, there is not a whole damn fucking lot left to do. Although I have to give it to the guy that he was actually p. competent, and it was more a case of my horribru dice than his luckerfaggotry.

Needless to say, the Secret Military Union is now overboard. But I ain't even mad. In fact I'm kind of glad I can finally drop this league.
 

RK47

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Dead State Divinity: Original Sin
Dang, Stan. You rushed it a bit much. GG.
Pity, you could've waited a bit more...
You were in a cage too.

rox.jpg


Them 4 players, they haven't moved when you turnover. :(
 

Darth Roxor

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Them 4 players, they haven't moved when you turnover. :(

Moved 1, catcher, to the los, 2 more were supposed to come after to cover the wolf after carrier would jolt down right because if they moved first they'd block his path.
 

stabby

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Failoffs Round 1 - Technical Difficulties

20090123105543-scout.jpg
...

20090123110441-eldar1.jpg
We're back on you vacuous primate.

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I don't care. I am not saying it.

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Yes, well, do pardon the delay viewers, there were some technical diffi -

20090123105543-scout.jpg
Technical? You call that [BEEP!] TECHNICAL?!

20090123110441-eldar1.jpg
If you would just quiet down and allow me -

20090123105543-scout.jpg
Nonono Ms. Xeno McSpaceTits. You aren't saying [BEEP!] about [BEEP!]. That did not happen. I don't believe it, the camera crew doesn't believe it, the Crowd doesn't believe it. IT. DIDN'T. HAPPEN!

20090123110441-eldar1.jpg
Well the fact the camera crew did not believe it is the problem because they stopped filming it!

20090123105543-scout.jpg
Nope. Didn't happen.

20090123110441-eldar1.jpg
Tch... Okay viewers, let's see if we can recap what happened.


Soooo, I may have forgotten to take screenshots after a certain point. But, at least I got some of the Key points at least (and I don't feel like sitting through the replay to fill the blanks. Kind of loses it's luster.)

Anyway, when we left off we were at the beginning of Turn 4, right?

Yup. Turn 4 begins by freeing the ball carrier from Glompy Golems...

WTGdT8p.jpg


QvZ6O1t.jpg


... and ends a couple of seconds later due to a misclick.

Now, if you think that's wierd, let me tell you, I don't know how exactly, but a few turns later this happened:

E461Ac9.jpg


Somehow delayed this til I finished the half with it

As for the second half of the game, the easiest way to explain it is this:

Ghoul picks up ball (a goddamned feat in itself), Bloodthirster chases Ghoul across pitch to the tune of Yakety Sax, KOing everything else that tries to get in its way, and then some time later...

cbEy4XC.jpg


Again, able to delay it until turn 16.

Again, not a damned clue, I doubt the replay will help, and even RK's asking me what the hell happened after watching it.

TL;DR version:
:what: <----- stabby while playing this game.
 

RK47

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Dead State Divinity: Original Sin
:lol: fuck you.
that's some fucking voodoo shit right there.
 

stabby

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Failoffs Round 1 - Wut?

Okay, I'm guessing that a couple of you are skeptical about that last post, and are thinking that stabby is trying to hide the shame of losing every match that was played this season (draw didn't count).

Well....

ImageMatchReport.aspx



Oh, this isn't even the last of it. Because you know how the game always picks the most useless player that is always the one guy who won't level up as the MVP? Well take a look who Nuffle picked out for me today:

zdYqfC4.jpg


Yup. 11 spp in one game. :retarded:

Looking at it one way, I guess I got my wish and get to face halflings next round. But the other side of that coin has me feeling that I now owe Nuffle a favour, and sometime soon he's going to be knocking on my door and asking me to hide the dead body in his trunk.
 

stabby

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So, already another delay in the ongoing proceedings? :roll:

Gotta say, 'tis making me tempted to run my own little league as a complete fascist twat just to keep things moving at a steady pace.
 

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