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Anime Kalin is a samurai of barely adequate honor

RK47

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Dead State Divinity: Original Sin
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01 - A cup on a fine day
Mutsu Province - Date Clan
It was the era of sengoku cibai...
Where men serve other men in battles across the nation, this is a tale of such a man -

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Alas, they have a reason to belittle Kalin - for he is last in the favored order of his lord.

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Enduring the humility a while longer, Kalin returns to his estate, pondering his next move.

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Patience is for the untalented. Kalin grabs his katana and steps out of his estate.
It's time for his daily cup of sake.

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To walk away from these dogs would stain his honor forever. Death is preferable to dishonor.

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However, the cowards do not fight fair and surround the hapless samurai. The townsfolk shut themselves in, hoping the fight would be over sooner. The whistling of arrows and blades are the only sounds in the village for now.

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Kalin's marksmanship and swordplay is the real thing - bodies begin to litter the streets. The thugs refused to yield and continue to assail the lone samurai.

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Two dozen of them would die before they flee the chaos.

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RK47

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Dead State Divinity: Original Sin
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Yoshiaki is the current favored vassal of lord Jinku with a vast fief and great honor - it is impossible to hope for him to fail. Should he pass away, his heir, Ieyasu is ready to take over.

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The battle opened Kalin's mind to possibilities. The way to the top is clear: he will simply cut down those who towers above him until he alone stands above the rest, standing be damned. He travels towards Yoshiaki's estate after cleaning his blade.

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Triggered, the man drew his blade. It is to be a duel to the death.

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Yoshiaki struck first, his fury apparent. Kalin was somewhat unprepared for this ferocity and took blow after blows.

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One more and it his defeat. And probably his death. Is this his recklessness punishing him?
No. In defiance, he lashes out, landing a blow to his opponents' legs.
Yoshiaki was caught off-guard by the sudden retalition.

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Taking a step back to the edges of the tatami, Yoshiaki taunted Kalin with calls to retreat.
Kalin's reply was an overhead swing that nearly severed Yoshiaki's shoulder.

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Both combatants were at the edge of life and death. One blow will settle it.
'I did not expect a man of so little honor to give me so much trouble!' Yoshiaki stated between blows.
Kalin was silent. It's now or never, he danced again, this time sideways towards the edge of the tatami mat, feigning fear in his eyes. No one could see the evil grin on his teeth as Yoshiaki grew more confident and drew close enough for his blade to kiss. With a satisfying chop, the proud lord's blade clatters to the floor.

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'Kono bakana-' the proud lord is brought low, uttering disbelief.
'Wait for your son in the next life,' Kalin mumbled as he raised his blade one final time.
The courtiers screamed as Yoshiaki was beheaded in front of their eyes.

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'Tell Ieyasu I'll be back.'

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RK47

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Dead State Divinity: Original Sin
Resu in Pisu
Despite his efforts, Kalin remains dead last on the merit order.

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Perhaps a strike on the vassal directly above him is called for.

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Kalin can't resist the lure of free pussy. He travels immediately to the Lord's estate. One must not delay the establishment of a household.

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The Kalin household will soon be blessed with children, paving the way for renewal should some misfortune befall its current head.
 

RK47

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Dead State Divinity: Original Sin
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A meager army, an even smaller household. But that won't discourage Kalin in his quest to climb ranks.

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It's time to strike at his immediate competitor, Kuemon. This man has no apparent heir and his death will end his lineage.

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After experiencing near death, this duel is nothing. Like plucking an edomame pod, Kalin drew his blade and finished it in two swift strokes.

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Kuemon, knees bent, eyes bulging out can only mutter a curse as the blade is brought down one last time.

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The deed is done. Kuemon's household fades into history. A new samurai shall be promoted to take his place.

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This newbie will start from the bottom.

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Two more to go.
 

RK47

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Dead State Divinity: Original Sin
05 - Dishonorable Acts
For this season, Kalin decides to increase the number of his samurais.

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It's not a lot. Samurais are necessary to protect his realms from bandits and peasant revolts. But with so small of a retinue, he can barely challenge other lords directly. Another season pass and Ieyasu, the son of his slain rival hasn't taken any action against him. What sort of cowardice is this?

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Traveling in disguise, Kalin sets forth to Ieyasu's estate grounds.
It is time to dishonor that miserable dog.

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The initial entry went undetected.

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But the hallway is long and dense with patrols, soon one of them discovered that his colleague didn't pass out from alcohol.

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To be captured would lead to much shame and dishonor. Not to mention a partial loss of his fief. Kalin cuts a bloody swathe through the hallways before finding the sleeping envoy's room.

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A quick stab and the deed is done.

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RK47

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Dead State Divinity: Original Sin
06 - Hide Yo Women
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The loss of honor was enough to topple Ieyasu, Choon is now top dog.

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He has no heir and a vast fief. He doesn't deserve any of that.
Meanwhile Lord Jinku makes a call to arms to any brave samurai.

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While Genbei, the worst of his rivals are requesting military aid in driving away attackers from his land.

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All these are beneath Kalin's concerns as he arrives at Choon's estate.

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Operation Cuckold is a go.

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The guards spotted him early and raised the alarm.
Thankfully Choon's stupid whore is cowering in a tearoom near the entrance.
Kalin sheathes his sword and grabs her before bolting for the door.

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'THE LADY'S BEEN KIDNAPPED!'
A lone archer shot Kalin on the back as he reaches the exit - but it was too late.

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A hentai is in progress.
 

RK47

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Dead State Divinity: Original Sin
07 - Cucked
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She did not reciprocate. No matter, it's time to ransom this meat for a piece of Choon's fief.

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Is he trying to rescue his beloved on his own? Better stay in the estates and get ready.

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:negative: That fucking idiot. The hostage is now worthless!

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The only upshot is that Kalin is now second ranked in the merit order.

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One more and he'll be top dog.
 

RK47

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Dead State Divinity: Original Sin
08 - Crispy
It's time.

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Kalin has no fucks to give. Everyone else but him is failing badly, the time is ripe to rise to the top.

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Ukyo? What a lame name. How about-

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Ieyasu greets Kalin nervously and asks what is the purpose of his visit.

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'Spare me the bullshit. I killed your father and now I'm gonna make sure you join him in the afterlife.'

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:what:

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There's no helping it. That coward prefers to die in his sleep. Kalin readies his ninja sword, ninja bow, ninja mask and ninja clothes. While this is happening another ninja has failed his mission at Ieyasu's estate.

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Genbei the worst remains the worst. Kalin knows the same wait awaits him should he fail.
 

RK47

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Dead State Divinity: Original Sin
09 - Next in Line
There are three choices when your rival refuses a duel to the death:
- Wait till he dies of old age
- Battle him directly with armies
- Kill him in his sleep

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Option 1 takes too long. Option 2 will take a few seasons of recruitment.
Therefore Option 3 it is.

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A disguised ronin has no business of playing hero. No one would attribute such a heroic act to Kalin anyway even if he succeeds.

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Night falls. It's time.

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'Ieyassuuuuu where aree uuuuuu i wanna kirrryuuuuu'

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Scores of the coward's men died on the hallways, but there's still no sign of the coward. Could he have escaped?

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Ah, turns out he wasn't a coward after all. He's so close to the entrance. I over-estimated his cowardice.

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'No running away now, dog.'

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Kalin begins the fight with a wound he sustained during the battles with the estates' guard. A small handicap.

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'F-father..' Ieyasu cried as he drops to the floor, painting the tatami mat with his blood.
There was no time to celebrate, Kalin wipes his blade clean before fleeing into the night.

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RK47

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Dead State Divinity: Original Sin
10 - Time to Ascend
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At last.

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Lord Jinku will no longer have any worries left in this mortal world.

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RK47

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Dead State Divinity: Original Sin
11 - Disregard Honor
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That night, dozens of Lord Jinku's retainers fell to a mysterious assailant.

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'A Hatamoto's residence has 2 levels? Yare yare daze'

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'Stop hiding, Hatamoto-san.'

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More bodies fell - but there was no sign of Lord Jinku on the second floor. Perhaps he is in the first floor?

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That crafty dog! He's literally a room away from the stairs to the second floor.

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'A very cunning plan to tire me like that. However, as you can see, I am unscathed even after I slaughtered forty of your men, Jinku-sama.'

Kalin waited for a response, but the Hatamoto's silent gaze began to make him uncomfortable. He felt a trace of something moist and salty on lips when he remembered the man's words welcoming him on his 16th birthday. The sound of a katana being unsheathed broke his train of thought. That is all in the past. Before him is the present and beyond it - his future. Win, and he becomes the Hatamoto. Lose, his beloved Jukeini and heir, Dibens will be executed for this act of treachery.

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'It seems I, Jinku, Hatamoto of Lord Date has chosen my retainers poorly.'
'Gomen. This wolf shall not share a mountain with a toothless lion.'
'So be it. My face is tired.'

Their blades clashed.
 

RK47

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Dead State Divinity: Original Sin
12 - Brought Down
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Lord Jinku won the first exchange. A horizontal slash that cuts Kalin's arm. He did not relent. His intent to put down a disloyal retainer was clear of hesitation. This is no human before him, just a mad beast that needs to be put down.

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Two strokes later and Kalin hasn't even landed a clean strike at all.
'Soon, your wife and child shall join you. Treacherous dog.'
Those words triggered Kalin who suddenly redoubled his pace and willed every cell of his body to exert out his ki onto his blade. He raised his katana, waiting for Jinku to approach to land a finishing blow and swings

"EIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!" with a great shout, he landed an overhead swing as gruesome as two strokes of a blade.

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The ferocity of this counterattack caught Jinku off-guard, his balance waver. And Kalin took advantage of the chaos, landing another strike as they moved to the center of the tatami.

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There, both men raised their blades. Anticipating each other to advance.
'Well fought, Kalin. But we both knows how this will end..'
'Shut up and come at me, old man.'
Their arms begin to tire.
Kalin, sensing this silly stalemate is getting too long to be worthy of a single update, decides to back off.

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The feigned retreat gave grounds for Jinku to advance. He took the bait. But at the last moment he loosened his grip and switched to a swinging stance. 'What does one strong overhead strike matter? All I need is a light swing and this man's life will perish like chrysanthemum flower in a storm...'

He looked down to his katana, and up again. Suddenly Kalin is much closer than he had anticipated. His blade raised in an all-out unparriable stance. The rapid taps on the tatami accentuates his speed. His mouth wide open letting out a mighty shout. It's coming.

'KIIIIIII-YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH'
'Shimatta.'

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His final thoughts were not for himself, but rather for his daimyo, Lord Date.

'I entrust Lord Date to you, Kalin.'
'Don't worry. He'll die the same way. Wait for him in the afterlife.'

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His despair doubled. This beast will not change its way. If he could just sway him in his last moments...
'Kuso. Why do you not see the honor in serving a fine lord?'
'Ponder upon that question as you watch me slay Lord Date from the afterlife.'
Kalin wills his blade downwards, but he need not to, Jinku is at his limits.

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Jinku's life is over.
 
Unwanted

Kalin

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Steve is a Let's Player of barely adequate honor! Since he managed to get both yours truly and my wife's son Dibens executed, and even failed to properly document this most shameful dispray, I was left with no option but to pick this up and do it right. So, without further ado:

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“The greatest victory is that which requires no battle.”

― Sun Tzu, The Art of War



This time we're doing it right!

No tomfoolery, no more amateur hour.

And, since this is an ironman LP, we're gonna play it safe and sneaky.

Our hero arises:

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Close enough!


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Dewa Province, all the way up in the northeast. Once the home of the legendary Clan Forty-Seven, the province is now ruled by the Mogami.

Dewa has a good mix of resources. Best of all, it's easy to navigate, so you don't have to trek all over the place to visit those estates.


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No compromises, Gattsu's sword or bust!


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Sutibu comes from a long line of accomplished armchair generals.


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All in all, the rivals could have been way worse. Asakari could be a problem, I'm getting Turi vibes from that one.

That said, these chumps only have a few dozen soldier. Pretty weak bunch.


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:negative: But not as weak as Sutibu...

Seven samurai, and not nearly as good as in the flick. These shit-tier troops won't get us far, so we immediately start recruiting more plebs ashigaru.


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Okay that is pretty bad. Need more land to recruit a lot of troops, but with such a small force it's not like we can conquer any.

Only one way to solve this:


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Judaya tactics! Sutibu's reputation takes a hit, but what good is face if you lack land and troops lah.

Besides, there will be plenty of time to get fame and respect once we have an army.


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A challenger appears! Sutibu's family remind him of his obligation as a samurai.

"This is a good moment to gain back some honour!"

"Cibai! I don't wanna get killed lah!"


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While Sutibu plays it safe and recruits more men, the buff high-T rival makes a move. He is no doubt going to fight the swordsman.

Meanwhile, business carry on as usual:


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:smug:


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Hah! You would think those ikko-ikki rebels would go after our fief, but the uppity peasants target Asakari instead.

Sending military aid is a good way to boost one's reputation, but Sutibu would much rather watch his rival suffer.


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Meanwhile, the third chump-in-line went for glory and got cut to shreds. :lol:


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Third in line and didn't even have to lift a finger. Iesada's replacement is beyond pathetic, so the position is secure!


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Sutibu's top rival Ujinoro joins forces with high-T Asakari to finally squash the Bradylama peasant revolt.


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Aaand they fail! :lol:

Life is good for our hero. His rivals keep gutting themselves, and he is free to raise taxes, hire men and slowly bide his time.

That is, until...


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"Ah boy! You marry, marry now!"

"YOU SIAO AH MUM? I don want no wife, I'm doin fine-"

"SEE KWEE KIA! We need heir, you marry lah! Or else!"

"B-but mom...!"
 

Darth Roxor

Royal Dongsmith
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Sutibu, my son. Yuo are men now.

Yu must choose wife and have childrens

Will you pick the butiful Kazuko

or chicken bucket I have brought from KFC?
 
Unwanted

Kalin

Unwanted
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:lol::salute:

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A true samurai only fights battles he can actually win.


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*grumble*


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The retainers look surprised to see Sutibu, who has been a completely no-show since his first meeting with Lord Genbei.

"Ah, Sutibu! Are you finally here to defend our clan's honour?"


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"I'd love to, b-but... H-haha... Family business to attend to, lah."

Sutibu makes his way to find Kazuko, feeling both dread and excitement...

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"Wo cao!"


Turns out Kazuko was more popular than anticipated.


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Due to his superior honour, buff Asakari snatches Sutibu's wife-to-be and makes her his woman. Our hero can but meekly mutter his congratulations. His family, of course, is outraged - this insult was deliberate, the loss of face... Unbearable! Yet in his heart, Sutibu feels relief. "Dodged another bullet. Not today, mom!"

As Sutibu treks back home, Ujinoro is up to no good:

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This cibai keeps showing off, winning battles and bolstering his forces. He clearly needs to go!

Well, at least we can laugh at the new kid on the block:


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"Nice fief noob, you'll make hatamoto in no-time!"



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We on the other hand are doing quite fine, the army is decent and we have enough land to recruit some more ashigaru.

Our honour, of course, is pathetic, but at least Sutibu is still alive.


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Buff bull is actually weaker than Sutibu in terms of warriors, but he still ranks higher since he cucked him good.

Well-respected, aggressive and currently out on the move. This is one bad hombre!


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Like a gift from heaven! :lol:

Asakari must've been angry as well that Ujinoro was pulling ahead. Too bad you failed, enjoy seppuku lah!

Lord Genbei replaces his entire house with a new one, led by this fearsome chap:


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:timcain:

Nice army bro. Real nice.


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Two down.
One left to go.
Sutibu didn't even unsheathe his katana.


:drink:
 

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