In Progress Decline 20: Dominions 5: Defenders of the Faith

[sqeecoo]

Wow! I'm honored to be mentioned in the same breath as the mighty Pythium! I'd also like to thank my parents, especially my mom and dad [actual quote from a Croatian celebrity].

 

[mondblut]

The only thing we fair maidens of Ys are challenging after is to build the best beach resorts in the world.

 

[Matalarata]

mighty Pythium

The notoriously well-endowed men of Ulm will always be welcomed as fuckbuddies in the queerest empire

 

[KoolNoodles]

And here I was just starting to run low on gems to summon with....

 

[Infinitum]

Oh, hey KoolNoodles. Underwater Jaguars. How droll. You have better have set aside your entire your water gem income for the rest of the game pumping those Troll Kings, because once I clear up the fishes and skeletons I'm coming for you.

As for Dayyalu; Losing to PD. Shameful display. Don't you have better things to than literally flush away that freespawn of yours? Like winning the game? I'm just a peaceful squid trying to forcefully subsume the Atlantian race. Even if you do get me Atlantis will get you right back once he realizes he just should've consolidated the lakes before heading inland. Cool your heels, rest on your laurels, buy some bloodslaves. There's no need for this situation, and more importantly nothing for you to gain from it.

Oh and Muty I declare war or something. Idk, this is how it's done around here probably? We've been neighbours forever, had that indy situation, currently been breaking down that fort of yours the past few turns? Hi.

 

[Matalarata]

...How about me... don't I deserve a mention? I perfomed decently vs your PD:

Spoiler

'cause I don't need my W income to follow you underwater and give you a good ol' pink-mindfuck™ (I also didn't bother to turn on the fog machine and give you a decent rave-party. But I only lost a single faggot anyway...)

 

[KoolNoodles]

Oh, hey KoolNoodles. Underwater Jaguars. How droll. You have better have set aside your entire your water gem income for the rest of the game pumping those Troll Kings, because once I clear up the fishes and skeletons I'm coming for you.

I want those Trolls to die, it was a mistake summoning them. They eat too much.

 

[Infinitum]

...How about me... don't I deserve a mention?

Evidently not; wrote off that throne from the start. Not even sure what my predecessor did on dry land with Atlantis and Shinu (..the fuck?) still sharing the pond. Priorities etc. Feel free to mindhunt me all you want, got plenty of tentacled runtlets to absorb slays and mindfuck you right back. You have a recuperation bless I take it? Not that I can even begin to fathom why you'd bother to begin with with Sceleria & co gearing up for a throne win but hey it's a free world. Mind you me needing that army elsewhere for the time being doesn't mean you won't get eaten by Vastnesses eventually, but I'm building up a backlog.

As an aside, killing any # of r'lyeh PD on land doesn't secure bragging rights. Sorry.

 

[Matalarata]

dude.... You know that a vastness is basically like having 500 markatas, right? A slog to kill but unable to kill anything.

Mind hunt you? Oh, no... nonononono. I'll just send underwater a 32 strong communion and rain pink death and psionic gayrape on you untill you're no more. Unless, as I already told you, we find some sort of agreement. I'm also currently fighting on 3 fronts, so consider what you saw a fraction of my army. The leftover of my conquest of Arco to be precise. That archtheurge you can see there? Do a little math. He's a F5A6W5S7 caster. Basically a pretender and he's but a single mage.

Not that I can even begin to fathom why you'd bother to begin with with

Because I can? Because you were extremely impolite and have a reputation for yolocharging around with no strategy? Because you casually decided to break a NAP with the single most obnoxious land nation you could (as R'Lyeh) choose as enemy? You impact on my logistics is a fukken 0 mate. Between teleporting arch-theurges, flying carpet communions, gateways, cloud trapeze and just flying harbingers I cover my empire from end to end in 2 turns tops. There's a reason me and all the other W nations are in good term. They know better than to fuck with such a nation.

Good luck!

 

[Infinitum]

..Accord? I'm an underwater nation. I've not attacked you. You just invaded my sole land holdings. I'll give you you do sound impressively aggrieved considering I've literally done nothing to you, but if you're gonna roleplay a diva there's precious little I can do to stop you. I'm sure your communions are plenty impressive, but maybe winning your current wars instead of striking out to sea would be a more constructive use of them?

 

[Matalarata]

Your memory is hazy, failed padawan.

Errr.... dear tentacles... you made a mistake. The sea is in the other direction...

Infinitum PM me, I had sorta of an understanding with R'Lyeh before.

New management, all existing agreements are pending review.

A review eh? I love reviewing. Working ATM but you'll receive my counterproposal soon. As soon as next turn starts, in fact! Unless we find some sort of agreement before.

Btw, that ball of unsupported chaff and tentacles can leverage very little

Yet there is vastness amongst them, young padawan. Tread lightly or carry a big stick.

>Renounce the dark side
>Pay compensations
>STOP ATTACKING MY ALLIES

...and git gud with diplo.


Edit: I'm currently winning 2 out of 3 wars. The third just started and one basically over. Also we're the best and only divas around mondblut is too chaste to flaunt

 

[Dayyālu]

There's no need for this situation, and more importantly nothing for you to gain from it.

I completely agree, there's very little to gain (considering that I am also at war with Machaka on the other side of the world). Sadly,

(When I said you can kill 500 skeletons par turn and I won't feel it I was not exaggerating Sceleria is monstrous)

Every turn my Northern skellfactory dumps this on me and I have to send them somewhere

You refused my kind gifts (it's considered very impolite) and support: when your neighbours asked for Skeleton help I was forced to support them.

We're open for peace, of course, for a good price. We keep our deals.

 

[Matalarata]

Fun fact: do you know how many tiles does an H9 caster cover with a single banishment?

Spoiler

20

Spoiler

if I'm not totally mistaken

 

[coldcrow]

So this happened: Ulm + Pythium officially declared war! We will crush you etc.

War turn 1: 1 raider, 1 scout and 1 smallish army step into my lands.

War turn 2: Raider gets tfo, scout dies, army stay in place.

Guys, is that an actual war? If not, please let Man and Shinu get back to killing each other.

 

[Matalarata]

Patience is the virtue of the strong!

 

[KoolNoodles]

This might be the longest normal looking border I've ever had in a game of Dominions.

 

[Dayyālu]

I seriously need to send some mage support.

Would you believe that I lost an entire turn of skellspam against Machaka on Bandar Log? Hey, worth a try, maybe it was empty.

Also, I vote to leave Man and Shinu to kill each other. It's a wonderful war, no one should interfere. Particularly not Ulm.

This might be the longest normal looking border I've ever had in a game of Dominions.

Told ya I'm friendly.

What reason do we have to come to blows after the Throne thing was solved? None, I dare to say!

 

[sqeecoo]

Guys, is that an actual war? If not, please let Man and Shinu get back to killing each other.

The Ulmish international peacekeeping forces have already achieved their main objective: a cessation of the senseless hostilities between the vibrant cultures of Man and Shinuyama that were fueled by sadly misguided religious fanaticism. We shall be sending teams of engineers shortly to help rebuild after the destruction of war along with police officers to aid local law enforcement in maintaining peace.

 

[Dayyālu]

We shall be sending teams of engineers shortly to help rebuild after the destruction of war along with police officers to aid local law enforcement in maintaining peace.

Sounds legit.

Keep on partying guys, nothing to see here.

 

[Isiloon]

I seriously need to send some mage support.

Would you believe that I lost an entire turn of skellspam against Machaka on Bandar Log? Hey, worth a try, maybe it was empty.

Also, I vote to leave Man and Shinu to kill each other. It's a wonderful war, no one should interfere. Particularly not Ulm.



Told ya I'm friendly.

What reason do we have to come to blows after the Throne thing was solved? None, I dare to say!

 

[Isiloon]

This turn I'm supposed to fight a big Dayyalu stack, I sent my army as I said I would. If i win I expect you to give me back my provinces kill me properly so I can eject...

Tell me where your capital is, I will march towards it and crush everything you send at me.

Then once I raze your capital to the ground and piss on the corpses of your dead mages, I will rebuild sceleria in my own image and rebrand Machaka as nu-age philosophical nigger kings

 

[Dayyālu]

Next turn, you triple-nigger.

 

[mondblut]

BTW, I am 1 turn away from the cataclysm in SP game, and apparently astral corruption happens then. JFYI. Make sure to order the surfing boards, swimsuits and condoms produced by our brand new factories staffed by Abysian refugees before the extraplanar horrors from labor unions force us to shut the production down.

 

[sqeecoo]

Tell us how the thing works when it happens!

 

[mondblut]

Tell us how the thing works when it happens!

If I don't get dominion victory that very turn, almost there, lol.

Staffed all thrones with packs of ether warriors led by quickened rudras with pairs of moonblades. Watching them deal with doom horrors should be fun.