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In Progress Cleanse, Purge, Kill: Inquisitor LP, for a safe and secure Codex

Joined
Dec 28, 2012
Messages
6,657
Location
Rape
TIME TO BURN

You heretics never learn.

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It's always the once you expect the least. Hiding in plain sight, embezzling church shekels, shagging the pure white serb choirboys. He shall burn, make no mistake.

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And if that wasn't enough turk thieves stole our sacred 2pack icons in the night.

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Could all this be a conspiracy to incriminate an otherwise innocent Judge? Could the heretics be fanatical enough to take their own lives to sow the seeds of suspicion or be manipulated themselves by a third party, moving unseen behind the curtains like jewmasons? Alas, a homosap such as our brave Jew does not have the brain capacity to realise. If only we had a neanderthal ubermensch to guide us.

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Sounds like wishful thinking to me, bro. ITZ is very, very terribly real. I have seen the negroes run amok with machetes in hand and have heard the cries of the whyte wimminz.

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Our investigation has reached a dead-end. Perhaps if we start looking into the matter of the missing 2pack icon we will uncover more clues.

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Our only lead. LSD-induced dreams after a long night of reading the works of Cleve Mark Blakemore. Worse than nothing.

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Lotti Frankmuller? Perhaps another time.

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Goy kids these days.

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BLACK EG PLAECD INSID HATCH AND WORST TURK WAS BORN
AT LAST I TRULY SEE

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Further up north.

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Is this Wales?

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And, finally, we find Paul, the blacksmith's son.

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TL;DR version:
ITZ


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Let's see if LSDwoman can shed some light into this.

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"A black cock's egg"
A Negroturk. Machete Kebab. We finally know our enemy.

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Goddamn it, stop scaring me.

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The Bishop might have something more scientific to say than the rest of these televitz-watching untermenschen.

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So there were no negroes involved in the ritual. Hmmmm. Most distressing.

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In the end, we don't even know what we don't know.

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We descend into the cemetery crypts to purge them, after we receive reports of foul necromancy in the area.

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As we advance further deep into the catacombs we discover the source of the evil.

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The Grace of Tupac

TRAITOR. USTASE PAWN AND DOUBLE POPOMOL our proud Jew screams and he and his brave serb companion engage the necromancer, who summons forth bosniak rascals from beyond the grave to assist him. The fight is hard but with the help of some nefarious Popamole magic his wounds keep regenerating.

"YOU MUST CRUSH HIS KEBAB MEAT. ONLY THEN CAN CROATIOAN TRAITOR BE DEFEATED" screams our proud serb knight companion and hurls himself like a thunderbold loosed by 2pack himself upon the ustase necromancer.

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The kebab is found and crushed. A cry of despair is raised from the throats of long dead bosniaks, huns and croatian cousins who know they are about to witness once more the triumph of Holy Serbia against Her foes.



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And so the Ustase Necromancer Popamole traitor is defeated, crushed like skul of pig, removed like worst turk. But it came at a terrible price, for Milosevic, our valorous companion had to sacrifise himself so that the brave Jew Inquisitor would have time to cut the kebab meat.
As we leave the crypts, a tribe of falcons in seen circling around the air, filling it with mournful cries.
Rest well, SON OF SRBJA!

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Another Ustase traitor is found, this one undercover. He is purged.

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TRIUMPH!

We are recommended for a promotion. Now we don't need a middleman to whom we have to surrender the Kebabs and Popamoles to be burned, but we will have the authority to burn them ourselves immidiately. Slava!

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Our Jew studied economics, law, politics and other such subjects that would allow Jewmasonry to continue ruling the goys from behind the scenes. Thus he breezes through the examination with ease.

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The lost sheep is found and returned to the Shephard

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FINALLY.
Incriminating evidence linking Vallarian to ITZ.

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Itz time.

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And so a simple Jew, filled with the spirit of Serbia and 2pack shall prevent ITZ.

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We chase Vallarian, who returns to the scene of the crime.

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Nothing worse than a proud heretic, an ally to worst turk and xeno, traitor to Orthodox Faith.

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Could this be? Is it too late to stop it? Will we all be raped?
What have you done, you croatioan popomole?

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Under the authority granted to me by the people of Greater Serbia and his Holiness Arkan, Tupac's representative on Earth, I declare you Worst Turk and Heretic, to be judged and purged according to Church Law.

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The man now shakes visibly, horrified that he is now a worst turk, enemy of Serbia. With a trembling hand and voice he summons forth his emasciated negro bodyguards, who fall upon our Jew hero with their machetes, their baby-skin cloaks shining with blood.

This fight is a desperate one. Faced with both Valarrian's popomol sorcery and the machetes of the albino Congoids, the inquisitor pits his Serbian magic against that of the heretic and worst turk, striking down the niggers with fire and lightning, paralysing the former Judge and calling upon the blessing of 2pack, for faster, better casting of rap-magic.

His equally brave and loyal dog, Kosovo, charges the enemy, rending meat from bone and scattering the bodyguards.

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Showing his worst turk roots, he surrenders like a coward. He is promptly taken and placed into the croatioan zoo until judgement is passed.

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Back in town, we begin to clean house. Our first heretic is sentenced with much rejoice from the populace.

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He is denounced before the townspeople, who throw kebabs and turkish delight upon his as he is tied to the stake.

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TO BE FARM ANIMAL THAT IS THE MARK OF THE KEBABS
TO BE WORST TURK THAT IS THE MARK OF THE KEBABS
TO BE COWARD THAT IS THE MARK OF THE KEBABS
TO BE REVILED THAT IS THE MARK OF THE KEBABS
TO BE IDIOT THAT IS THE MARK OF THE KEBABS
TO BE PURGED THAT IS THE FATE OF THE KEBABS
TO BE REMOVED FOR THAT IS THE FATE OF ALL KEBABS

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Back in the Zoo, we decide to interrogate Vallerian for anything else he has hidden from us.

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He refuses to break his silence. The only sounds that come from his heretic mouth for the next hour are screams.

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Our job here is town. The area is cleansed.

When our Jew first came here this was a place filled with xenos, worst turks, heretics and croatioans, bosniaks and other rascals and race traitors. Like fire from heavan, our inquisitor hero cleansed, purged and killed his way to the truth and tore this cancer of Popomolism from the the province. Once again, Serbian children can play freely in the street without the fear of being molested by hidden worst turk idiot. Once again the Light of God and Tupac shine.

But ITZ has began. We must continue our fight elsewhere.

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The now redeemed Knight-Commander sends us to Glatzburg, a Kraut town too cowardly and kraut to deal with the heretic cult (to which Vallarian belonged) that infests it. As long as one heretic draws breath there can be no peace.

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And so our quest continues.
 
Joined
Dec 28, 2012
Messages
6,657
Location
Rape
DANGER, DANGER, HIGH VOLTAGE
When we cleanse. When we purge.
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Welcome to Glatzburg, nefarious kraut Discocity, capital of deprativity, sodomy and youth-corrupting music. It should all end in a rain of fire and brimstone, but that would eliminate any phat loot hidden in it that our Inquisitor could use. We shall have to purge it by foot.

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We decide to begin by investigating the vice-governor. Seems like he wants to climb the social ladder on the backs of the Holy Office.

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This might be worth investigating, but it could simply be incompetence on a grand scale on the part of the individual.

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Backstabbing vice-governors, incompetent dukes andundead former-governors. Now what does this remind me of?

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This can't end well.

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Something tells me he wouldn't make a better duke than the current one. Yeah, this definitely reminds me of some other place.

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Dumb bitch.

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"Insert spousal abuse joke here."

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Oh wow, whatever his other faults, vice-president here keeps his bitch in check. I change my mind, we should start investigating the Duke.

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Stockholm Syndrome.

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Far be it from me to empower feminism. At least the natural order of things is not disturbed in this house

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Even the servant looks like a jewmason plotting in the dark. I've had enough of this.

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The Cathedral ain't much better. The moment I step in and announce myself and my dog this faggot jumps at me and wants to investigate me. Too bad negro, stopped being a choirboy at the age of 13.

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He's either lying, which is unsurprising considering what Vallarian was doing or he's telling the truth which means we are gonna have to cleanse half the town to find any shred of evidence. Either way we get to burn heretics so fine by me.

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In before "go clean a city infested with the ghosts of long dead heathens for me"

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Who wulda thunk it. At least I got my High Voltage spell now.

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The Bishop, despite what D'Arrias said, also rubs me the wrong way. In fact, every clergyman except the ones who sold me potions and Jeremiah proved to be either heretics, prisoners of heretics, vampires or aspiring vampires.

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Maybe we should have paraded Vallarian on a tractor around the realm for everyone to hear his confession. Too bad I didn't think of it earlier.
Fuck it, back to the city. I need to make some jewgold and kill heretics.

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This sounds promising.

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Goddammit, is everyone here a rapist? Fucking krauts.

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Oh?

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Jesus fucking christ, what is with everyone in this game? Every convo in this game goes like:

"OH MAH GAWD INQUISITAH YOU WANT BEELEEV WAT I SAW LAST NIGHT"

"What did you see my good man?"

"IT WAS HORRIBLAH I WAS SO SKARED"

"What was it you saw godammit?"

"I ALMOST TURNED INTO A PILLAR OF SALT"

"WHAT DID YOU FUCKING SEE?"

Then a wall of text about how they shit their pants and dark figures dressed in baby-flesh cloaks and wielding machetes that they didn't recognise. Fucking Czech bastards.

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Finally, paydirt. Either the vice-governor is right or the bitch is lying straight out of that whore mouth of hers. Seems like the Duke isn't man enough to keep his females in check like his underling does.

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Might as well jew that bitch. She's probably a lying heretic or the spouse of a heretic, which makes no difference to me.

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Too much drama for my liking. She's hiding something, I'm sure of it.

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Lastly, we meet the Dook. He doesn't strike me as dumb as I thought he'd be. Maybe spousal abuser and lying whore made an unholy alliance to frame their heretic acts on him. So many possible candidates for the kebab stick.

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More xenos worst turks for us to zap with High Voltage.

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The town beggar/troglodyte thanks us for finding his precious amulet and gives us a clue. A trip to the graveyard is planned.

We leave the city and head for a nearby encampment, where the carpenter said that a supposed witch is hiding.

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Meet Jeanette, overly talkative witch/rape victim. She claims that Brookwelt, the carpenter, is the sorcerer not she. Seems like we shall have to turn on our bullshit detector.

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Or maybe not.

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As always, it ends in violence purging.

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Astral Strike, better known as High Voltage is used to deal with the soul-devouring succubi, patron godesses of feminism. A great victory for the patriarchy has been achieved today and the inevitable decline halted for now.

We go back to town and collect a meagre reward from the grateful carpenter.

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In the western district of Glatzburg we meet the town Knight-Commander.

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This dude also strikes me a bit shady. Maybe I'm being too paranoid.

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Here we go again. Get to the fucking point.

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Something is fishy here.

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WHAT A FUCKING JEW FAGGOT.

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Shit. Might as well take some jewgold while we are at it.

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Even at the tavern people are haunting me.

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Trust no one Inquisitor Jude.

Time for a graveyard visit.

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At the graveyard we reach the undertaker's shack after Voltaging our way through hordes of zombies and belligerent hordes of ghosts.
Problem is the troglodyte refuses to come out until all the undead are dead gone, so chicken-shit are the krauts.

300 zombies and 50 ghosts-worth of xp later

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So the whore was lying after all. I begin to see a pattern here. We should rape torture interrogate all the noblewomen in every town we find ourselves in. The decline is strong in this game.

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A horde of ghouls and phantoms later we discover this opened grave, as well as the shred of a cloak. If it belongs to the Duchess we sure as hell got her.

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The purge won't be long arriving.
 

flabbyjack

Arcane
Joined
Jul 15, 2004
Messages
2,592
Location
the area around my keyboard
I finished a playthrough (Wow... what a potion-chugging dungeon humper... but the intrigue and dialogue were good). So I'll just dump some Inquisitor screenshots here. The graphics are pretty sweet and get grimdark near the end.

This game has a lot of style. I liked the sound effect of your heart pounding in its chest during the final scene. This games good use of sound (and in some parts -- graphics) to set the mood, and has really stunning (and devious) level design later on.

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IDK why OP didn't include some of the splash screens. They are gorgeous

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Super-spoilers
You can choose a good or bad ending. Each choice results in a different pair of enemies at the end, and of course with different dialogue sets.

Cinematic ending is the mostly same regardless of your choice. Either Prince Louis goes to war with the invading crusader army, for evil or for good. Existential references occur as per screenshot.

It looks like the 'Alignment' slider bar on the character screen has very limited use during the game.
 

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