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5Hitman: derpolution

Discussion in 'General Gaming' started by commie, May 30, 2011.

  1. commie Magister Patron

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    I thought that's what it meant but I was trying hard to imagine it actually wasn't as derpy as it sounded.
  2. deus101 Never LET ME into a tattoo parlor! Patron

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  3. Peter Arbiter

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    :salute:
  4. torpid Educated

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    To be fair, Blood Money had a mission where you could inject sedatives into donuts and then give the box of donuts to FBI agents in a surveillance van to put them to sleep, so the developers' humor has always been derpy, but it was never this bad. And that was a one-off to take care of a small group of enemies, not a foolproof disguise aid.
  5. Monkeybiscuit Literate

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    Great, one of my favourite series of all time has been hit with the dumb stick. No doubt inspired by the success Splinter Cell Conviction had by turning it into a third person shooter.

    And

    Well this explains mostly everything. Squenix have their talons into the Himan franchise now, which will probably guarantee that 47 will shock us all with a new spiky haircut and a pet sidekick, oh and explosions, lots of explosions in slow motion.

    Seriously what's up with Squenix anyway. Shouldn't reconizing the fact that you no longer make games that people care about enough reason to do so? Instead of morphing into a Mafia like publishing agency, which only exists to create multibillion dollar CGI presentations to hype games which you didn't make?

    Shit like this is depressing. There were few dev houses left in this world who you could rely on to deliver you a genuinely good game. Right now there is still parts of eastern Europe that still have development houses who are able to create a game which isn't influenced by who their publisher is, but the number is obviously getting smaller with the loss of IO
  6. Peter Arbiter

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    Truth be told, the Kane and Lynch games were turd , so I can't really say IO were delivering good games these last couple of years. But yeah, there was still some hope for 5Hitman.
  7. Angthoron Arcane Patron

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    If IO didn't want to bake turd cakes, IO could have refused contract, afaik they own the IP, and not Squeenix. Hell, they could've gone the PB way and left the publisher and gone to someone else, like the folk publishing PB now, or even just publish through Steam and XLBA/PS3A or whatever they're called, even if it was at the expense of some derp company producing one whole shitty Hitman, like the shit Gothic 4.

    They didn't, so they're just as much of a bunch of BioWare-like greedy fuckers as their Squeenix overlords. Fuck 'em, they don't deserve defending.
  8. Peter Arbiter

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    And let's not forget that Squenix is publishing the new Desu Ex this year, which has turned out excellent judging from the leak. Granted, Desu Ex has always had quite a bit of kawaii desu ne~~~ in it's blood, so it might've appealed to Squenix as is, but the fact that it has turned out to have genuinely good gameplay just means that we have IO to blame for the 5hittines of 5Hitman.
  9. Angthoron Arcane Patron

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    Yeah, that too. Squeenix seems to be producing a lot of different games at the moment, from Desu Ex to Dungeon Siege 3, I guess they're trying to scout the market and possibly try to cater to different segments rather than to the mythical One Buyer To Buy Them All, which is actually a good move.
  10. MetalCraze Dumbfuck!

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    All of games you've named are aimed at that one buyer - a retard.
    Cassidy Brofists this.
  11. Monkeybiscuit Literate

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    Yeah I agree. I'm not saying like Squenix swooped down and stole the franchise, but under them IO definitely don't have the same creative control, and it is a choice that IO made on their own. Which is hugely disappointing.

    Game devs are facing a massive problem of not knowing their place in the industry. All of them want to be the mega successful types but don't have the right subject matter or pubisher/reputation to make it. They could do just fine as they were by making "niche" games, but instead they try and market games to the fickle casual audience, who will ignore your game if it's graphically/technically outclassed by something else.

    The whole problem with IO specifically is that they were probably forced to take this deal as they are going down the pan. Breaking away from Hitman to try something else obviously was a good idea, a development house can't survive on a single franchise. But both Kane and Lynch games were just another genre confused mistake. Was it a shooter or was it a serious gritty story? It tried to be both and failed as both.

    And I hear from these forums that IO were pruning their workforce. After Kane and Lynch I'm really not surprised. Seriously, after you make a mediocre game that nobody really cared about, you do not try for a sequel.
  12. Drakron Savant

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    I do wonder how close is Square Enix to Eidos ... sure they brought it but it seems Eidos is operating in the exact same way that lead to its downfall.

    In fact it seems Tim Ryan is Chairman of the Board and Phil Rogers is the CEO of Square Enix Europe, guess what were their positions in Eidos pre-merger?

    Its not possible for Square Enix to "steal" the franchise from IO Interactive since they by extension they brought IO Interactive when they acquired Eidos and I doubt changes were brought by Square Enix, considering their own problems back home I suspect what we have now is Eidos, not Square Enix Europe.
  13. BLOBERT Liturgist

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    BRO LOLLOL AT ALL YOU FAGGOTS JERRKING OFF OVER OLD PLAYSTATION GAMES

    LLOLOOLOL CHECK YOUR ASSHOLES FOR YOU BRIANS LOLLOLOL
  14. Clockwork Knight Arcane

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  15. Angthoron Arcane Patron

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    And this is actually also a good point. Please correct me if I'm wrong, but in its "dying" years, I came to think of Eidos as a pretty shitty publisher, not EA kind of shitty, but more of the joyfully deceased JoWood, with churning out shit and shit and shit to try to pay the bills, ending up with several fucked up or dead franchises. I don't claim this is accurate, this is just the feeling I had about Eidos, besides, the only IPs I can think of them publishing are Hitman, Commandos and Tomb Raider, and of those, they fucked one up, they discontinued the other, and they had shitty funds for supporting the third post-production (eg patching).
  16. Drakron Savant

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    Correcting it a bit.

    Eidos was brought by SCI in 2004, Eidos was already sinking at that time (DX:IW was released in 2003) but SCI been pretty much unable to turn the tide and they were pretty much a continuation of Eidos disastrous management, except less disastrous.

    I think Eidos would be better compared with Atari, as Infogrames had several good games it seems the name change was a curse, they became complete shit ... also bailed out by another Japanese company (Namco Bandai) that brought up their European operations (Atari Europe) and then Infogrames share in their joint venture, Distribution Partners.
  17. sgc_meltdown Magister

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    SLANTED SHOOTIN
  18. Matt7895 Augur Patron

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  19. Peter Arbiter

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    One disguise in that whole video. ONE. How can these idiots fuck up Hitman so fundamentally?

    :x

    At least I still have the Death to Spies series to play through.
  20. abnaxus Cipher

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    Looks like Alpha Protocol.
  21. Jack █▓▒░

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    BRRRRRRRRRMMM

    BRRRRRRRRRMMM

    BRRRRRRRRRMMM
  22. Morgoth Arcane

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    Hitman 1 was the only Hitman I ever played. I remember it was hard as ass, and really special at the time.

    Looking at Absolution, this just looks like another fucking Splinter Cell clone.
  23. Peter Arbiter

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    You're missing out.
  24. Morgoth Arcane

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    Nah.
  25. Peter Arbiter

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    I forgot, you only play :obviously: games like Gears of War.

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