NSFW Best Thread Ever [No SJW-related posts allowed]

[Clockwork Knight]

ligu of legendo

 

[markec]

 

[pOcHa]

rigu of regendo

fixed that for you

 

[Mañjuśrī]

December 3rd
20 Built-in games
£89.99

It will be 45% smaller than the original machine, and comes with two smaller replicas of the pronged controllers and an HDMI cable to plug into modern television sets.

A full games list has yet to be announced, but titles will include the classic role-playing adventure Final Fantasy VII, the fighting game Tekken 3, Namco’s seminal urban driving sim Ridge Racer Type 4 and the early 3D platformer, Jumping Flash.

 

[unfairlight]

At least it isn't too overpriced, and the games are good. "20 pre-loaded games", though, that wording makes me think that this will be internet connected and you can buy more games for it.

 

[Night Goat]

Christ, they couldn't even be fucked to put analog sticks on the controller. Could they make it any more clear that this is a low-effort production?

 

[unfairlight]

Original DS didn't have analogs, though. Most games were designed without them in mind.

 

[Owl]

I guess since the controllers are "smaller replicas", the tiny analog sticks would be of very limited use.

 

[Alienman]

Christ, they couldn't even be fucked to put analog sticks on the controller. Could they make it any more clear that this is a low-effort production?

Wow, I didn't even notice that. If you really want to play PS1 games, you might as well buy a PS2 instead of this.

 

[Grimlorn]

Does he hold the fleshlight too?

 

[Eyestabber]

I find this Dark Souls 3 parody to be p. funny. Sue me:

 

[Clockwork Knight]

*record scratch*

*freeze frame*

*zoom in*

Hai, that is me. You might be wondering how I ended up in this situation...

 

[Trithne]

At least it isn't too overpriced, and the games are good. "20 pre-loaded games", though, that wording makes me think that this will be internet connected and you can buy more games for it.

It has FF7, they've guaranteed success even without that.

 

[Lahey]

They're doing it again.

https://picosong.com/wLgxe/
https://picosong.com/wLgx7/
https://picosong.com/wLm5a/

 

[markec]

 

[unfairlight]

 

[unfairlight]

agentorange As a response to the what? button, the gun model is from a Novalogic game called Joint Ops and the text in the left is some text file detailing weapons, it's all "Ask Joel" because no one other than him knew how any of that shit worked. Joint Ops is notoriously badly coded, on 8chan a group of people are making a mod called Radmod, which they have went through hell to make because of that.

 

[Dayyālu]

Is Novalogic still alive?

I mean, i enjoyed their light pseudo milsim projects in the late 90ies and early 00s, but I believed they were dead and buried.

 

[unfairlight]

Sort of? THQ Nordic bought everything they had last year I think, while they never went bankrupt they stopped making games during the mid 2000s. They released one last game in 2009 and they just sold whatever they had made on their site, which is still up even today.

 

[Assisted Living Godzilla]

Original DS didn't have analogs, though. Most games were designed without them in mind.

The PSX had analog controls longer than it didn't. The Dual Analog Controller and DualShock came out a couple years after the North America release. Most of the games I've heard about being on this thing also came out the year of, and after the DualShock did. No DualShock also means they're just not going to be able to have Ape Escape, at least not without people having to buy more controllers.

 

[Mañjuśrī]

Next instalment in the History of Commodore series.

 

[Astral Rag]

Twitch has been blocked in China

Twitch saw a tremendous uptick in popularity in China last month, becoming the third-most popular app on the iOS App Store, according to Abacus News. The surge was reportedly driven by the presence of esports at the 2018 Asian Games, which weren't carried by state broadcaster CCTV but were available on Twitch.

That potential win for Twitch has turned sour, however, as Chinese authorities have responded by blocking Twitch outright. The website is no longer accessible in the country, and the app has been removed from the App Store. Twitch confirmed with the site that it has been blocked, but offered no other details.

It's not necessarily a huge direct loss for Twitch, since it wasn't much of a presence in China to begin with, but the success it enjoyed with the Asian Games esports stream could have been a big stepping-off point for further growth. But even though the block was apparently imposed without warning, it's not exactly surprising: China has never been a beacon of online freedom, and recently seems to be cracking down even more forcefully than usual, including a full-on freeze of game license approvals last month.

I've reached out to Twitch for more information about the block, and the likelihood of a resolution that will see service restored, and will update if I receive a reply.

 

[Neanderthal]

The round eyed devils may force us to buy their opium, but Twitch is going too fucking far!

 

[unfairlight]

How is this Incline? At best it barely matters. Chinese users weren't paying users, so Amazon is losing nothing.

 

[Astral Rag]

Because it's always a good thing when cancers go into remission?