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Mass Effect BioWare Montreal's Mass Effect: Andromeda - where element zero meets trisomy 21

santino27

Arcane
Patron
Joined
Oct 1, 2008
Messages
2,678
My team has the sexiest and deadliest waifus you can recruit.
That kotaku romance article is just fucking sad, no pun intended.
 

DeepOcean

Arcane
Joined
Nov 8, 2012
Messages
7,394

giphy.gif
 

Malpercio

Arcane
Joined
Dec 8, 2011
Messages
1,534
I swear you guys are more obsessed with Bioware romances than the people that I know are into this game, at this point. :P

There's nothing inherently bad with romances in an RPG. Problem is that Bioware do that stuff only to pander to a certain audience, and it is done in a way in which you have to flirt with them until you have the sex scene (treated as a quest reward), and then you've done with that character.
It's basically a chekbox on their list of "mandatory" stuff to insert in their product, nothing more.

Sounds like the average waifu game, including Codex beloved Witcher 1. :M
 

MRY

Wormwood Studios
Developer
Joined
Aug 15, 2012
Messages
5,703
Location
California
It is sort of remarkable that a road that began with "the player should be able to romance a Green-Skinned Space Babe because that's an important space opera trope" has led to this. I'm not sure it's quite "good intentions" per the proverb, but I can't imagine it's where they thought they'd end up.
 

Blaine

Cis-Het Oppressor
Patron
Joined
Oct 6, 2012
Messages
1,874,662
Location
Roanoke, VA
Grab the Codex by the pussy
We require a report on how many female-to-male trannies BioWare have inclooded in Ass Defect.

The answer is 0; they aren't stereotypical enough

I'd say it's mostly because SJWs are much more keen on men chopping off their penises than vice versa. We can't have people thinking that women would want to voluntarily become patriarchal shitlord rapists, now can we?
 

pippin

Guest
It is sort of remarkable that a road that began with "the player should be able to romance a Green-Skinned Space Babe because that's an important space opera trope" has led to this. I'm not sure it's quite "good intentions" per the proverb, but I can't imagine it's where they thought they'd end up.

when it comes to Bioware, the road actually began when they noticed many people modded sentimental relationships in BG1 and thought it would be a neat feature to have in BG2 right from the start.
 

oldmanpaco

Master of Siestas
Joined
Nov 8, 2008
Messages
13,609
Location
Winter
Don't worry, BioWare is about to fix the most pressing problems with the game, they're on top of this:






One or two fewer gay male romances and they leap to the conclusion that the devs feel they are nothing. What a bunch of drama queens. Jesus Fucking Christ. Please, Trump... bring back the draft.


So by my math 6 of the 10 romancable npc's have gay romance options. If you take the Asari out of the equation due to the nature of their species the number drops to 4 out of 8. So 50% of the NPC's are gay when the most reliable study puts homosexuality somewhere around 4%-6% of the population. If anything the sodomites should be ecstatic that they are so over-represented by bioware.

Also the only proper RPG romances are implemented by that Lover's Lab Skyrim mod. You know the one.
 
Joined
Jan 7, 2007
Messages
3,181
So by my math 6 of the 10 romancable npc's have gay romance options. If you take the Asari out of the equation due to the nature of their species the number drops to 4 out of 8. So 50% of the NPC's are gay when the most reliable study puts homosexuality somewhere around 4%-6% of the population. If anything the sodomites should be ecstatic that they are so over-represented by bioware.
You're forgetting that this is a colonization mission. Lack of m/m romances is a valid concern.
 

Sykar

Arcane
Joined
Dec 2, 2014
Messages
11,297
Location
Turn right after Alpha Centauri
I swear you guys are more obsessed with Bioware romances than the people that I know are into this game, at this point. :P

There's nothing inherently bad with romances in an RPG. Problem is that Bioware do that stuff only to pander to a certain audience, and it is done in a way in which you have to flirt with them until you have the sex scene (treated as a quest reward), and then you've done with that character.
It's basically a chekbox on their list of "mandatory" stuff to insert in their product, nothing more.

Sounds like the average waifu game, including Codex beloved Witcher 1. :M

Now imagine if all that wasted time on retarded romances would have been spend on actual gameplay, animations and writing a non-retarded and at least slightly innovative story and maybe, just maybe, you understand why we shit so hard on these "romances". Nevermind the context as to how and why they came to be in the first place.
 

Cyberarmy

Love fool
Patron
Joined
Feb 7, 2013
Messages
8,448
Location
Smyrna - Scalanouva
Divinity: Original Sin 2
You've seen Cora and Vetra sex scenes, now share my pain and look at this weird shit. Looks like a discounted Avarar sex scene. But this time instead of space cats they are having sex with pink space rabbits:



Just watched this...

It's nice o'clock in the morning, I have an important business meeting and for some reasons I watched that shit...

And now I cannot get it out of my head, need to clean muh brain with some bleach I guess...
 

santino27

Arcane
Patron
Joined
Oct 1, 2008
Messages
2,678
My team has the sexiest and deadliest waifus you can recruit.
I swear you guys are more obsessed with Bioware romances than the people that I know are into this game, at this point. :P

There's nothing inherently bad with romances in an RPG. Problem is that Bioware do that stuff only to pander to a certain audience, and it is done in a way in which you have to flirt with them until you have the sex scene (treated as a quest reward), and then you've done with that character.
It's basically a chekbox on their list of "mandatory" stuff to insert in their product, nothing more.

Sounds like the average waifu game, including Codex beloved Witcher 1. :M

Now imagine if all that wasted time on retarded romances would have been spend on actual gameplay, animations and writing a non-retarded and at least slightly innovative story and maybe, just maybe, you understand why we shit so hard on these "romances". Nevermind the context as to how and why they came to be in the first place.

Given the samples I've seen, I highly doubt more time would have improved the writing in any way. And I suspect that might be true for the animations too. This isn't a matter of 'oh no, the rest of the game is shit because of these nauseating 'romances'', it's a matter of 'the game is shit because of incompetence... and look, it also has nauseating romances.'
 

Sykar

Arcane
Joined
Dec 2, 2014
Messages
11,297
Location
Turn right after Alpha Centauri
I swear you guys are more obsessed with Bioware romances than the people that I know are into this game, at this point. :P

There's nothing inherently bad with romances in an RPG. Problem is that Bioware do that stuff only to pander to a certain audience, and it is done in a way in which you have to flirt with them until you have the sex scene (treated as a quest reward), and then you've done with that character.
It's basically a chekbox on their list of "mandatory" stuff to insert in their product, nothing more.

Sounds like the average waifu game, including Codex beloved Witcher 1. :M

Now imagine if all that wasted time on retarded romances would have been spend on actual gameplay, animations and writing a non-retarded and at least slightly innovative story and maybe, just maybe, you understand why we shit so hard on these "romances". Nevermind the context as to how and why they came to be in the first place.

Given the samples I've seen, I highly doubt more time would have improved the writing in any way. And I suspect that might be true for the animations too. This isn't a matter of 'oh no, the rest of the game is shit because of these nauseating 'romances'', it's a matter of 'the game is shit because of incompetence... and look, it also has nauseating romances.'

Incompetence is certainly a big part of it, but come on, those romances must have guzzled quite a bit of resources which could not have been put to a worse use. The game might have been saved from unplaybale and unenjoyable turd to somewhat passable space soap opera at least.
 

Bumvelcrow

Somewhat interesting
Patron
Dumbfuck
Joined
Nov 17, 2012
Messages
1,867,060
Location
Over the hills and far away
Codex 2013 Codex 2014 Make the Codex Great Again! Strap Yourselves In
And now I cannot get it out of my head, need to clean muh brain with some bleach I guess...

Is it that bad? I've so far managed to avoid it. I don't have an important business meeting, but I do have a meeting with actual humans in about 5 hours. Is that enough time to recover? Will it leave less mental scarring if I turn the sound off?
 

FeelTheRads

Arcane
Joined
Apr 18, 2008
Messages
13,716
You've seen Cora and Vetra sex scenes, now share my pain and look at this weird shit. Looks like a discounted Avarar sex scene. But this time instead of space cats they are having sex with pink space rabbits:



Just watched this...

It's nice o'clock in the morning, I have an important business meeting and for some reasons I watched that shit...

And now I cannot get it out of my head, need to clean muh brain with some bleach I guess...


Is this for real? Really? Why? Regardless of the prosperian world in which that sex act would take place, why does it look like Oblivion?
And I thought Biowhore didn't do nudity?
 

Terpsichore

Arcane
Joined
Aug 18, 2011
Messages
1,789
Location
why
What even happened to Prosper anyway? I was looking towards trying his game, would even order him some pizza for a copy. :|
 

Theldaran

Liturgist
Joined
Oct 10, 2015
Messages
1,772
Lol I'm just imagining the outcry over what would be essentially (in the south anyways) a slave management game.

Wasn't Conception 2 just that? (Haven't played the first one, with its creepy subtitle "please bear my child!") Child slave labour, besides.

Damn them Fapanese!
 

Infinitron

I post news
Staff Member
Joined
Jan 28, 2011
Messages
97,225
Codex Year of the Donut Serpent in the Staglands Dead State Divinity: Original Sin Project: Eternity Torment: Tides of Numenera Wasteland 2 Shadorwun: Hong Kong Divinity: Original Sin 2 A Beautifully Desolate Campaign Pillars of Eternity 2: Deadfire Pathfinder: Kingmaker Pathfinder: Wrath I'm very into cock and ball torture I helped put crap in Monomyth
Oh god it's getting Oblivion-style LARPing articles now: http://www.eurogamer.net/articles/2017-03-21-how-to-actually-enjoy-mass-effect-andromeda

How to actually enjoy Mass Effect: Andromeda

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There's enjoyment to be gleaned from Mass Effect: Andromeda, but in order to discover it, you might need a guide. No, not SAM, your cranially implanted AI assistant. SAM is awful - a toneless bore who doubles as a cautionary tale about leaving work notifications active on your phone, forever bleating at you to mine things, scan things, check your email, take vidcalls and spend your Andromeda Viability Points. As the vehicle for much of Mass Effect: Andromeda's more tedious content, he makes a far more convincing nemesis than the story's actual villain, who at least puts you through a few decent firefights en route to some scenery-chewing monologues about racial supremacy.

You can't mute SAM, alas, but you can read this article (or watch the accompanying video) about what to focus on in BioWare's fourth Mass Effect, a game of obscene bloat, hilarious and/or maddening glitches and ghastly hoop-jump design that harbours a few worthwhile missions, nice views and a sparky, generous array of combat options. Onwards!

Put off the filler
To seriously appreciate Mass Effect: Andromeda you've basically got to become a minor sociopath, resilient against all entreaties for aid. Spotted somebody fidgeting on the periphery of a scene, casting their eyes heaven-ward and crying "woe is me"? Halt, adventurer! Don't ask them what the matter is, because they'll only tell you they've lost their geology A-level notes and before you know it, you'll be picking over limestone formations in some godforsaken crevasse.

You can carry on playing after finishing Andromeda's campaign to complete the majority of side missions, so feel free to ignore some of the bittier offerings (e.g. scan X busted power boxes, find X herbal specimens, recon uncharted worlds etc) on your first runthrough. Bear in mind, though, that certain missions like the quests to investigate the missing turian and asari arks will affect the endgame a little. Companion loyalty quests are, as far as I can tell, completable after the endgame too, though some are tethered to your progress through the main storyline.

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Another hub, another bunch of needy cattle to resolutely ignore.

Do the Vault missions first on each planet
Most of the game's explorable planets features a Remnant Vault - a vast, buried labyrinth made up of simple switch-and-platform puzzles that houses a mighty terraforming machine, activation of which bumps up the planet's viability for settlement by a whopping 40 per cent. It's absolutely worth doing these before any other activities, because planets are more pleasant to navigate once terraformed - it means you can spend longer away from the Nomad in some areas without running out of life support, and there are fewer, annoying, performance-killing particle effects to worry about. Once you've terraformed a planet, you'll also be able to found a Nexus outpost with its own crop of missions.

Vaults are quite entertaining in themselves, if repetitive. To reveal the entrance, you'll need to visit three monoliths and complete some simple sudoku-style puzzles, scanning the environment for glyphs and plugging them into four-by-four grids (you can spend tokens gathered at smaller Remnant ruins to auto-complete these puzzles). Once you're in, it's all about using switches to raise platforms, unlock doors or erect defences such as energy bubbles that shield you from harm - gentle conundrums that accompany more taxing firefights against Remnant robots. There's a pinch of Halo's AI ecology to how the Remnant do battle - you'll encounter Assembler units that like to hide and build other units, and artillery-type enemies who dig in behind frontal shields.

Tweak the settings
One of the Andromeda's many inelegances is that conversations are sometimes inaudible because one participant is a dozen metres away, or even in a different room entirely. It's especially aggravating when you're trying to follow squad mate banter, so hit the Settings screen first thing and switch on subtitles. You might also want to set the game to always display objective markers on screen, because the world map can be a little opaque.

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I could really see a list feature ranking gaming's countless long-dead civilisations in order of practical-mindedness.

You don't have to craft...
If wading through turgid menus and weighing the merits of a +5 shield regen enhancement vs +4 tech area-of-effect numbs your imagination, fear not - there are plenty of gun parts, armour pieces, mods and consumables to pluck from bodies or treasure crates out in the world, including bespoke armour sets for the different species in the game, and some flashy N7 gear from the original trilogy. In general, if the critical path through a dungeon heads one way, always check around the corner in the other direction - there will, I pretty much guarantee you, be a treasure of some description. Likewise, if there's a low wall at the rear of a chamber with something mission-critical right in the centre, look behind that wall. This is a very predictably designed game.

...but crafting is cool
If you are in a lather at the thought of trading your Mark II Initiative Helmet for some sweet kett headgear, and you don't mind taking the time to gather raw materials, there's an absolute embarrassment of crafting options in Andromeda - three research trees for Milky Way, Helius Cluster and Remnant weapons and gear, plus gun mods you can apply (or remove) before each mission, and one-use augmentations that dramatically rework the item in question. This, for me, is where much of the satisfaction of the game is to be found - via judicious application of mods and augmentations, you can craft an assault rifle that fires wall-penetrating homing plasma darts, a shotgun whose pellets explode after impact, and chest armour that electrifies people who melee attack you. Remember to deconstruct (not sell) spare weapons or mods for crafting materials, and to free up precious inventory space.

You don't have to rotate your squad
No need to worry about keeping your sidekicks occupied - in Andromeda, characters level up even when not in the field, so everybody should be fighting fit by the endgame, providing you remember to allocate those skill points. Stick to the people whose company you enjoy - in my case, that would be either hard-nosed, soft-centred turian smuggler Vetra or Jaal, your stalwart angaran chum (characters don't always get along with each other, not that this affects the combat - pick Liam and PeeBee and you'll be treated to some tiresome grizzling about life priorities and putting the team first). If you're struggling in combat, I recommend bringing Cora - her biotic charge is rarely a match-winner but does at least tend to put her in the way of incoming fire, and her higher level abilities include some useful group buffs. You don't have any real control over comrades, but this way they can boost your chances indirectly.

jpg

Jaal dislikes hot weather and will remind you of this frequently.

Shortcut the resource-gathering
Every time you increase your Nexus level (a measure of your overall progress in settling Andromeda, mostly fed by carrying out missions on planets) you get a cryopod point to spend on thawing out Milky Way colonists for passive bonuses. Prioritise the ones that lead to regular deliveries of crafting materials, credits and so on - you'll have less gathering to do out in the field. On the other hand, to gain Nexus levels you'll need to grind side missions to earn Andromeda points, and some cryopod unlocks are tethered to how many planet-specific quests you've completed, so there's drudgery involved either way. Don't forget to pick the cryopod option that raises your inventory cap, too.

Prioritise the best planets
The shimmering ice world of Voeld is glorious to behold, distinguished by a massive kett cruiser bolted to a mountain at the map's centre, and features one of the game's better story missions. But as generic as it may appear, desert beauty-spot Elaaden is probably the pick - it's home to a mission involving a gigantic sandworm creature, a massive Remnant derelict that calls to mind that of Ridley Scott's Alien, and a vertiginous krogan colony where you'll come across some of the more amusing incidental writing. Elaaden is also more visually varied than it seems at first glance, mixing towering sandstone structures with rolling, wreckage-laden dunes and fungal grottos, and the game's armour textures look lovely in the heat and dust.

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Choke upon the wrath of my magic spanner, henchman #579!

Dress to survive, not impress
One of Andromeda's annoying inconsistencies is that while you can revive squad mates, they can't return the favour - a pain in the gonads indeed during later Remnant Vault escapades that disallow manual saves, where you'll be steadily lasered to a crisp if you stray out of cover. For minimal frustration, go large on gear that keeps you upright and intact, rather than boosting your powers. Remnant Heritage armour in particular is resource-intensive - it requires large amounts of uranium, a scarcer commodity - but worth the trouble for its sizeable buffs to your shield regeneration and damage resistance. By the endgame I was able to tank multiple grenade blasts, all thanks to good old Remnant knowhow. Remember to plug a few points into skilltrees that increase your sturdiness, too, like Barrier or Combat Fitness.
 

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