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Mass Effect: Andromeda Pre-Release Thread

Joined
Mar 12, 2012
Messages
10,861
Preview, now with Scottish cussing:



Sounds like a Macam...from Sunderland or around there, not technically a Jock, but subhuman nonetheless, it's like the difference between a big dirty brown rat and vole, not something that that you would think about too much before stomping on it to death, anyway here's Sunderland if you're curious...

Sunderland.8.gif


gilley-law-flats-sunderland.jpg


exit-from-asda-carpark-sunderland-shows-a-thanks-for-shopping-with-DA0DP6.jpg


sunderland-fans-2014-newcastle-united-nufc-650x400.jpg
 
Joined
Mar 12, 2012
Messages
10,861


Why am I still surprised this gets worse the more I see?

And why has Bioware got one of their fucked up lesbian diversity hires writing dialogue for this man? I read a lot and know the sex of who (sorry) whom is writing dialogue and this guys lines were written by a fucked up pill popping SJW overweight purple haired trust fund lesbian with entitlement issues and first world problems.

EDIT

Jesus fucking Christ I didn't watch this entire clip through, this is worse than the tired face dialogue it's not as badly acted but the writing is cringe inducing and on the level of a tumblr blog
 
Last edited:

Stokowski

Arcane
Joined
Nov 23, 2011
Messages
4,580
Location
Gehenna
Please stop linking from WorthADumbass. Seriously, this guy contradicts himself almost every single video. On one video he complains about X-Ray vision and gives it a thumb down, on the next video he gives thumbs up to Overwatch. On one video he complains about dumbed down gameplay, yet he praises Skyrim for its combat just because it's an FPS. He calls Dark Souls repetitive because all you have to do is dodge all the time, while thumbing up most FPS games even though you are supposed to do the same in them.

Why is this guy even a reviewer.

Well, he's a failed taxi driver so it was either game reviewing or rescuing child prostitutes.

BTW, he's a Geordie, not a Scot.

EDIT: OIC salacious has posited Mackem. As the difference between Geordie and Mackem is about 11 miles, I defer to his greater precision.
 
Last edited:

RapineDel

Augur
Joined
Jan 11, 2017
Messages
423
They wouldn't do this if they didn't have at least some assurances of positive reviews from some of the press.

Looking into it further, I think it might just be streamers being allowed to show/talk about more of the game and not the actual review scores. That said I can't see things getting any better, most of these sorts of games have a polished beginning/most of the main story as that's what reviewers will see and focus on. They couldn't even accomplish that with this game so I highly doubt mid-game/optional content is where most of the work was done.
It's not uncommon for the beginning of RPGs to be one of the worst parts - Wasteland 2, Knights of the Old Republic 2, or the Hinterlands in Dragon Age: Inquisition for a Bioware example.

That's a fair point. In terms of actual polish though I'd be surprised if optional content and mid/late game will be far more polished then what we've seen. I think Bioware want streamers to be going further on where it's more combat focused so they can show off hours of popamole mmo quests instead. Get the feeling they just want people as far away from anything NPC related as possible.
 

Shackleton

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Knackers Yard
Codex 2016 - The Age of Grimoire Make the Codex Great Again! Steve gets a Kidney but I don't even get a tag. Pathfinder: Wrath I'm very into cock and ball torture


Why am I still surprised this gets worse the more I see?

And why has Bioware got one of their fucked up lesbian diversity hires writing dialogue for this man? I read a lot and know the sex of who (sorry) whom is writing dialogue and this guys lines were written by a fucked up pill popping SJW overweight purple haired trust fund lesbian with entitlement issues and first world problems.

EDIT

Jesus fucking Christ I didn't watch this entire clip through, this is worse than the tired face dialogue it's not as badly acted but the writing is cringe inducing and on the level of a tumblr blog


Wtf is it with the hair modelling? I mean, even without hairworks games could do hair better than this years ago!

JkWwPJn.jpg


It looks like it's just a cheap wig slapped over a completely bald scalp, which of course is what it is really, but come on, so many games have done hair better. Surely this can't be the best Frostbite can do?! It looks even worse in motion, there's no natural sway at all.

And yes, the dialogue is like it's written by a person who's never had an actual conversation. Look at this level of cringe:

lPs57uZ.jpg


wWTQlrv.jpg


ZhJwGUs.jpg


xbWCiFd.jpg
 
Joined
Mar 12, 2012
Messages
10,861
Alright I may now have something that may be the coup de grace on this game check out the fresh webms...

...You remember I want to be a Dragon?... Such a funny meme Mark...

fec4fe74a3e347f3a8d45b0a252a92536fef3ddd31d1184db065676525d70830.jpg


...Well Bioware either are referencing memes that to took the piss out of their own shit writing, or they are just so fucking bad that they put in a scene where a guy says I want to be a Mongoose...
https://webmshare.com/yALzb

Here's why you should never get a sexually repressed, fishy smelling, 30 something, fat, tumblr lesbian (because she has no male takers) SJW landwhale to write dialouge for male characters, even if you've shoehorned them into the plot as gays and given them Veterinarians gloves for birthing a calf (which we all know is the universal dress code of homosexers)...

...Sucked, Oops, Nuts and Jazzed said by a male character all in the space of 20 seconds....

https://webmshare.com/9ngqW

Great writing Bioware yes a thirty year old hard as nails space engineer with an English accent should talk like a Valley girl because he's gay and likes shopping and shit right? Instead of being interested in the inner workings of machines and mens aresholes and men machine arseholes.

tumblr_mu0lz7h2E51sj9tmgo1_400.gif


The last one Jesus I don't even know what to say...

https://webmshare.com/YGRQG
 

Zeriel

Arcane
Joined
Jun 17, 2012
Messages
13,379


Why am I still surprised this gets worse the more I see?

And why has Bioware got one of their fucked up lesbian diversity hires writing dialogue for this man? I read a lot and know the sex of who (sorry) whom is writing dialogue and this guys lines were written by a fucked up pill popping SJW overweight purple haired trust fund lesbian with entitlement issues and first world problems.

EDIT

Jesus fucking Christ I didn't watch this entire clip through, this is worse than the tired face dialogue it's not as badly acted but the writing is cringe inducing and on the level of a tumblr blog


Wtf is it with the hair modelling? I mean, even without hairworks games could do hair better than this years ago!

JkWwPJn.jpg


It looks like it's just a cheap wig slapped over a completely bald scalp, which of course is what it is really, but come on, so many games have done hair better. Surely this can't be the best Frostbite can do?! It looks even worse in motion, there's no natural sway at all.

And yes, the dialogue is like it's written by a person who's never had an actual conversation. Look at this level of cringe:

lPs57uZ.jpg


wWTQlrv.jpg


ZhJwGUs.jpg


xbWCiFd.jpg


It's basically procedural hair vs. hair that is created as part of the model. The latter was how it was done since forever, but a few games are opting for generic solutions that can be slapped on every model these days.
 

Jarmaro

Liturgist
Joined
Dec 31, 2016
Messages
1,466
Location
Lair of Despair
Last edited:

Fairfax

Arcane
Joined
Jun 17, 2015
Messages
3,518


So the antagonists are teletubbies? First class design, Bioderp, first class. The more I see of this turd the more I am reminded of this old video about EA:



I guess the abbrevation ME:A should have been considered a dead giveaway by me...

I don't think EA has much to do with this. At the end of the day, BioWare had 3 studios (most of it by BioWare Montreal, I think?) to make this happen in 5 years. That's at least $60 million before marketing, and that's on the lower end. Unless it's revealed that EA actively influenced the game's development for the worse, this is 100% on BioWare, and with no excuse for it.
 

RangerBoo

Arcane
Joined
Dec 13, 2016
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723
Location
The Homeless Paradise of Washington State

Zeriel

Arcane
Joined
Jun 17, 2012
Messages
13,379
The line between satire and incompetence is vanishingly tiny. Witness how The Room became a cult classic of "so bad it's good" cinema, when that film was an honest attempt to make a serious flick.
 

FUDU

Arcane
Joined
Jan 2, 2012
Messages
1,217
Location
COLD POTATO

Jarpie

Arcane
Patron
Joined
Oct 30, 2009
Messages
6,603
Codex 2012 MCA
The line between satire and incompetence is vanishingly tiny. Witness how The Room became a cult classic of "so bad it's good" cinema, when that film was an honest attempt to make a serious flick.

If it gets mocked enough, just wait couple/some years for the devs to retcon ME:A like The Room's director did, "We intentionally made it as a satire!".
 

PhantasmaNL

Arcane
Patron
Joined
Nov 20, 2012
Messages
1,653
PC RPG Website of the Year, 2015 Grab the Codex by the pussy Codex USB, 2014 Shadorwun: Hong Kong Divinity: Original Sin 2 BattleTech Bubbles In Memoria
Just watched a YT PT of the first mission of MEA. Wow, that gives a whole new dimension to the word boring.

Compare that to ME1s first mission, Eden Prime (?), short and well structured, introducing you to the Geth and Saren and just enough information to get the story started, a few fights (didnt ME1 work with actual RPG mechanics so you basically sucked at shooting anything apart from point blank, because skillpoints, causing rage in the shooter crowd?) and quite a few new weapons. A lot less pretentious too and of course not poisoned by sjw correctness.
 

Juggie

Augur
Joined
Sep 22, 2010
Messages
105
Just watched a YT PT of the first mission of MEA. Wow, that gives a whole new dimension to the word boring.

Compare that to ME1s first mission, Eden Prime (?), short and well structured, introducing you to the Geth and Saren and just enough information to get the story started, a few fights (didnt ME1 work with actual RPG mechanics so you basically sucked at shooting anything apart from point blank, because skillpoints, causing rage in the shooter crowd?) and quite a few new weapons. A lot less pretentious too and of course not poisoned by sjw correctness.
Are you for real? Eden Prime, like all ME missions, was one long corridor. That's well structured how? Andromeda's first mission is non-linear and has several optional objectives. And how is it poisoned by SJW correctness? The pathfinder team not wanting to go in gun blazing and stomp any aliens they meet? If that's the case I have a perfect show for you.
 

RangerBoo

Arcane
Joined
Dec 13, 2016
Messages
723
Location
The Homeless Paradise of Washington State
Just watched a YT PT of the first mission of MEA. Wow, that gives a whole new dimension to the word boring.

Compare that to ME1s first mission, Eden Prime (?), short and well structured, introducing you to the Geth and Saren and just enough information to get the story started, a few fights (didnt ME1 work with actual RPG mechanics so you basically sucked at shooting anything apart from point blank, because skillpoints, causing rage in the shooter crowd?) and quite a few new weapons. A lot less pretentious too and of course not poisoned by sjw correctness.
Are you for real? Eden Prime, like all ME missions, was one long corridor. That's well structured how? Andromeda's first mission is non-linear and has several optional objectives. And how is it poisoned by SJW correctness? The pathfinder team not wanting to go in gun blazing and stomp any aliens they meet? If that's the case I have a perfect show for you.

Found the Biodware apologist.
:timetoburn:
 

Jarpie

Arcane
Patron
Joined
Oct 30, 2009
Messages
6,603
Codex 2012 MCA
Just watched a YT PT of the first mission of MEA. Wow, that gives a whole new dimension to the word boring.

Compare that to ME1s first mission, Eden Prime (?), short and well structured, introducing you to the Geth and Saren and just enough information to get the story started, a few fights (didnt ME1 work with actual RPG mechanics so you basically sucked at shooting anything apart from point blank, because skillpoints, causing rage in the shooter crowd?) and quite a few new weapons. A lot less pretentious too and of course not poisoned by sjw correctness.
Are you for real? Eden Prime, like all ME missions, was one long corridor. That's well structured how? Andromeda's first mission is non-linear and has several optional objectives. And how is it poisoned by SJW correctness? The pathfinder team not wanting to go in gun blazing and stomp any aliens they meet? If that's the case I have a perfect show for you.


I want Republican Space Rangers the Game! would be so awesome. Kill all aliens! Would be vastly superior to commie-marxist bs what Bioware pushes! Yee-haw!

:killitwithfire::imperialscum::timetoburn:
 

iZerw

Arcane
Vatnik
Joined
Apr 18, 2012
Messages
895
Location
Russia
Please stop linking from WorthADumbass. Seriously, this guy contradicts himself almost every single video. On one video he complains about X-Ray vision and gives it a thumb down, on the next video he gives thumbs up to Overwatch. On one video he complains about dumbed down gameplay, yet he praises Skyrim for its combat just because it's an FPS. He calls Dark Souls repetitive because all you have to do is dodge all the time, while thumbing up most FPS games even though you are supposed to do the same in them.

Why is this guy even a reviewer.
You know, he is not a professional game critic, he is just an average Joe trying to convey his opinion through videos which got surprisingly popular. Go and critic polygon or IGN channels which should be unbiased and professional.
 

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