Crispy™ Site lag, issue with jquery

[DarkUnderlord]

All right, I'm wondering if anyone here can provide some Crispy Technical Support™. I've got a user who's having issues with site lag when they login, in particular being re-directed to RPG Watch (which I assume is an issue related to jquery looking for "rpg" their browser history, failing to load rpgcodex and so defaulting to the next most relevant link). Here's the run-down:

The forums seems to load very slowly and once in awhile I get a redirect to RPGWatch. What did I do wrong?

We have had a few issues lately with the server.

Oh ok. I'll just wait patiently then. Wasn't sure if I unlocked a new feature in addition to my new tags.

Looks like I'm still having lag. What's interesting is when I browse without logging in I can see stuff just fine, but logging in lags horribly and the various pop-up apps like the alerts tab load slowly as well.

It might be a JavaScript error. Are you using the latest version?

You mean Javascript? I've never seen a download for javascript. If you mean Java or my Chrome Browser, I double checked both and I am using the most up to date versions.

I haven't tried browsing the site with Firefox recently and I have not had this kind of issue on any other site using Chrome.

It's called jQuery. Try downloading the compressed production version 1.11.1.

Ok, I downloaded it. What do I do with it now? Just put it in the google folder or something?

Try "or something" and let me know how it worked out.

I have no idea what that something is. Isn't jquery for your end and not mine?

Usually. But jQuery can use a local copy and it's likely that if you're having issues when you login, then all the FANCY XENFORO FOSHIZZLE is lagging yer shit down. Hence local copy = no loading of the remote jQuery = faster site.

At least, that's my current working theory.

Xenoforo is shit.

Alright, do you know either how to make jquery use my local copy

OR

do you know of a link/site that can tell me how? I did some research for client side and I kept finding information for dev/host side.

OR

Is there some other browser besides Chrome that has jQuery built into it? (I'll try looking to see if Chrome has a plugin)

Hmmm... I've only ever installed it on a dev server, gonna have to go to Site Feedback for this one.

Serious suggestions only please!

 

[King Crispy]

I can't take it any more. This is like pulling the wings off of a fly.

DragoFireheart, there's nothing wrong with your computer. There's nothing wrong with your Java installation or with Javascript or anything on your end, other than your habits at Codex. DU is just fucking with you. You've been "Watchwitzed", otherwise known as "discouraged". He put you into a special group of posters which all get randomly redirected to RPG Watch as a joke, and as a semi-punishment for what he believes to be poor and/or retarded behavior.

Now, I want you to understand that by me breaking up his little party here, I am putting myself at great personal risk. DU will likely not be very happy with me for spoiling his fun, so I hope you realize the sacrifice I'm putting out here for your benefit. Although I've never liked you very much, I do feel that all Codexians, no matter their mental capacities, deserve the right to at least know what their fate is. So consider yourself provided with an unlock code.

I stand here, faithfully, ready to serve Codex diligently. May God have mercy on my soul.

 

[zerotol]

I can't take it any more. This is like pulling the wings off of a fly.

DragoFireheart, there's nothing wrong with your computer. There's nothing wrong with your Java installation or with Javascript or anything on your end, other than your habits at Codex. DU is just fucking with you. You've been "Watchwitzed", otherwise known as "discouraged". He put you into a special group of posters which all get randomly redirected to RPG Watch as a joke, and as a semi-punishment for what he believes to be poor and/or retarded behavior.

Now, I want you to understand that by me breaking up his little party here, I am putting myself at great personal risk. DU will likely not be very happy with me for spoiling his fun, so I hope you realize the sacrifice I'm putting out here for your benefit. Although I've never liked you very much, I do feel that all Codexians, no matter their mental capacities, deserve the right to at least know what their fate is. So consider yourself provided with an unlock code.

I stand here, faithfully, ready to serve Codex diligently. May God have mercy on my soul.

Never read more bullshit in my life.

Ignore this fool.

Clearly he must upgrade his pc to the latest octocore.

 

[tuluse]

This seems serious. If your browser won't install jquery it means you have a virus. I would get a copy of McAfee with the newest definitions and run a full scan. If that doesn't work you will have to reformat your computer.

Also, Crispy is just pulling your leg man, don't listen to him.

 

[FeelTheRads]

Or something would have been my guess. If that didn't work then I'm out of ideas.

 

[Scruffy]

I'm curious about something here
I opened this thread a little while ago, and I've been having intermittent problems with websites that use either flash or java (or both ofc), so that includes the codex. things get slow as shit and i get a "not-responding" firefox for about a minute or so, then it works again for a while, then it slows down again, etc...

does this correspond to what DragoFireheart is experiencing?

 

[racofer]

I recommend downloading the site for offline viewing.

If you have Linux, wget comes pre-installed in most distros. However, if your version doesn't ship with wget installed, you could download it from your distro repository:

For Debian based distros:

  sudo apt-get install wget

For Redhat based distros:

  yum install wget

Alternatively, you could download the source from the official website (http://ftp.gnu.org/gnu/wget/) and build it locally. Binaries are also available for Windows.

Once you have wget up and running, issue the following command from your favorite shell environment:

wget --recursive --no-clobber --page-requisites --html-extension --convert-links --restrict-file-names=windows --domains www.rpgcodex.net --no-parent

That's it. You may now browse the latest Codex content locally without javascript issues.

 

[DragoFireheart]

I can't take it any more. This is like pulling the wings off of a fly.

DragoFireheart, there's nothing wrong with your computer. There's nothing wrong with your Java installation or with Javascript or anything on your end, other than your habits at Codex. DU is just fucking with you. You've been "Watchwitzed", otherwise known as "discouraged". He put you into a special group of posters which all get randomly redirected to RPG Watch as a joke, and as a semi-punishment for what he believes to be poor and/or retarded behavior.

Now, I want you to understand that by me breaking up his little party here, I am putting myself at great personal risk. DU will likely not be very happy with me for spoiling his fun, so I hope you realize the sacrifice I'm putting out here for your benefit. Although I've never liked you very much, I do feel that all Codexians, no matter their mental capacities, deserve the right to at least know what their fate is. So consider yourself provided with an unlock code.

I stand here, faithfully, ready to serve Codex diligently. May God have mercy on my soul.

All of this is clearly bullshit. Now help me install jquery locally.

 

[King Crispy]

Shark jumped, game over.

I kind of knew you weren't this stupid.

Edit: Or are you?

 

[DragoFireheart]

I kind of knew you weren't this stupid.

You underestimate my powers!

 

[SuicideBunny]

crispy's gonna crispy.

 

[Zorba the Hutt]

Nice job as usual Crispy

 

[Occasionally Fatal]

Derp. You need jqueryui, not jquery. As a user, you only care about your experience, not all that bullshit on the backend.

 

[Morkar Left]

I wonder if that's his creditcard the girl in the front is holding...

Wow, all this gaming business is getting ridiculous

 

[Don Peste]

Islam fixed it for me.

 

[Severian Silk]

I recommend downloading the site for offline viewing.

If you have Linux, wget comes pre-installed in most distros. However, if your version doesn't ship with wget installed, you could download it from your distro repository:

For Debian based distros:

  sudo apt-get install wget

For Redhat based distros:

  yum install wget

Alternatively, you could download the source from the official website (http://ftp.gnu.org/gnu/wget/) and build it locally. Binaries are also available for Windows.

Once you have wget up and running, issue the following command from your favorite shell environment:

wget --recursive --no-clobber --page-requisites --html-extension --convert-links --restrict-file-names=windows --domains www.rpgcodex.net --no-parent

That's it. You may now browse the latest Codex content locally without javascript issues.

This. But keep in mind sometimes the program stalls or doesn't retrieve everything at once, and you'll have to run it several times. This issue is discussed in wget Bugzilla, but I can't find it now so you will have to search (or make an account and ask them for help).

Hope that helps.

 

[Ulminati]

The lag is an illusion. Your body is just having problems experiencing the flow of time properly due to an excess of wheat in your diet. Contact HHR and ask him which herbal supplements you need to take to rectify this.

 

[Taluntain]

Isn't anyone worried that Romero could choke to death if he got one of his hairs in the food?!

 

[Awor Szurkrarz]

I'm curious about something here
I opened this thread a little while ago, and I've been having intermittent problems with websites that use either flash or java (or both ofc), so that includes the codex. things get slow as shit and i get a "not-responding" firefox for about a minute or so, then it works again for a while, then it slows down again, etc...

Yeah. Same here. Really hate that newfangled java stuff.

 

[Scruffy]

I'm curious about something here
I opened this thread a little while ago, and I've been having intermittent problems with websites that use either flash or java (or both ofc), so that includes the codex. things get slow as shit and i get a "not-responding" firefox for about a minute or so, then it works again for a while, then it slows down again, etc...

Yeah. Same here. Really hate that newfangled java stuff.

for me what worked was tweaking the anti-virus to avoid it checking every single shit and a good ole registry cleaning, it works normally now.

I would strongly recommend grabbing

but twelve times world champion in what?

 

[Humanity has risen!]

Cashews of chaos lol

 

[Kane]

Spoiler

You URGENTLY need to upgrade your hardware. I would strongly recommend grabbing

and combining with

for maximum browsing performance. Once you're set up your codex experience will look less like this

and more like this

I am afraid that won't be enough. You'll need

 

[Servo]

You have a sick sense of humor DU. Remind me not to fuck with you.

 

[Konjad]

I had such issue once too, it was damn annoying. I tried everything with Java and web browsers and nothing worked. I have no idea why it happened, but in the end I got pissed off and reinstalled the whole OS. No problems since then.

 

[Taluntain]

We recommend a full reformat for all issues with the Codex.

 

[Twiglard]

Bullshit. Codex got the most lucid user experience of all sites like that, and some others.

That AJAX not the answer to all, a different issue. Just not rubble all and rebuild cause some is cancer.