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Let's awaken Dragon Age: Awakening! (COMPLETED!)

dextermorgan

Arcane
Joined
Aug 24, 2009
Messages
4,177
Location
Ελλάδα
I can't wait to trade my : x crop for a new PC so that I may experience this game for myself in all its bloomy, repetitive and brain damaging glory.
 

DarthBehemoth

Learned
Joined
Oct 4, 2010
Messages
567
Location
Netherlands
Sorry for the long dissapearance, but life's a little hectic right now.

* * * *
Let's begin with Sigrun's joining. I actually forgot that in the last update

Awakening_0001.jpg


PO_Codexer2.png
Another wishes to undertake the joining

PO_Varel.png
I hope they fare better than ser Mhairi

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Awakening_0006.jpg


Awakening_0007.jpg


PO_Varel.png
You chose her well, Commander. She will wake shortly

Come to think of it, we haven't really talked to our last companion
Awakening_0010.jpg


PO_Codexer2.png
They're all at your disposal

Awakening_0012.jpg


Awakening_0013.jpg

:smug:

Awakening_0014.jpg

Why do my companions always bitch about the past? GET OVER IT!

PO_Sigrun2.png
He's dead now

PO_Codexer2.png
Half of the people I've ever met are dead, too

No kidding

PO_Sigrun2.png
Varlan was special to me

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Awakening_0019.jpg


Awakening_0020.jpg

Personally, I think the Legion needs to stop acting like retards

PO_Codexer2.png
That's why you're the last of the Legion

Real smooth, Codexer

Awakening_0022.jpg


[Intelligence] Dust Town is where all the poor midgets live.

Awakening_0023.jpg

Let's hope she doesn't find the playboy magazine I stuffed in there

* * * *
Awakening_0024.jpg

Let's just do it

Awakening_0026.jpg

Yes it's a cave, SO WHAT!

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What do the Deep Roads smell like? Rotting Darkspawn with a flavour of crazy Broodmother?

Awakening_0028.jpg

Easier said than done.

Awakening_0030.jpg

And here we are, the Deep Roads underneath the Vigil

Awakening_0032.jpg

Of course Deep Roads = Darkspawn = stupid filler combat

Awakening_0034.jpg


Awakening_0035.jpg

This doesn't look suspicious at all!

Awakening_0036.jpg

Suddenly, undead pop out of nowhere

I think we'll know who to ask...
Its-A-Trap-Tshirt-500x344.jpg

IT'S A TRAP!

You got that right, Ackbar

Awakening_0037.jpg


After murdering the undead, a Fade ghost joins the party
Awakening_0038.jpg


Awakening_0041.jpg

Fuck it, this is getting a bit thight

Awakening_0042.jpg

But we proved victorious

Awakening_0043.jpg

We use the... thing to destroy the Fade ghost and clear a path.

Awakening_0044.jpg

It's Ogre killing time!

Awakening_0045.jpg


Awakening_0047.jpg


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Shit. The Fade ghost came back to torment us!

After a quick fight, the ghost departed the body
Awakening_0049.jpg


Awakening_0051.jpg

Nothing's ever easy is it?

Awakening_0052.jpg

:violin:

PO_Codexer2.png
We don't have much time either. Get to work

Awakening_0054.jpg

Honestly, do we look like we care?

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It's doors closing! Oh, I tell you this is the beggining of an industrial revolution (sarcasm)

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PO_Codexer2.png
Let's go back to the Keep

* * * *
Topside, the midgets strike again!
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PO_Codexer2.png
I ahve a feeling I'm not going to like this

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PO_Codexer2.png
I havent come across any. I'll keep an eye out.

Awakening_0067.jpg


NEXT UPDATE: We'll investigate the merchant caravan attacks!
 

racofer

Thread Incliner
Joined
Apr 5, 2008
Messages
25,575
Location
Your ignore list.
I really don't get where people get these complaints, but I still believe DA looks surprisingly good in the graphics department specially the lighting.
 

DarthBehemoth

Learned
Joined
Oct 4, 2010
Messages
567
Location
Netherlands
Before we continue our main quest, let's do some sidequesting!

Awakening_0001.jpg


Just in case you forgot:
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Awakening_0002.jpg


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you won't see a sovereign until I see the Girl

This is starting to look like a bad hollywood movie. Then again Bioware games are bad hollywood movies.

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PO_Codexer3.png
Send the girl first, then I give you the money

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Crap. That didn't work Let's try a different approach

PO_Codexer3.png
Carefull how you speak to the commander of the Grey

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Yes, run away from Codexer and his army of badly-written party members

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Not for long

PO_Codexer3.png
(Intimidate) There's a river of blood behind me. Touch her if you dare.

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:smug:

The girl managed to escape the thieves
Time to kill!

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* * * *
Awakening_0019.jpg

The wending wood. Remember we're here to investigate the caravan attacks

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Do you even have to ask what happened next?

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I don't normally show party dialouge, but this one made me lol
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Some bandits think it's funny to sneak up behind us.
It's not

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Calm down

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Unless it's a big fat girl wanting sex with you. I'm not feeling sorry

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Why? What have you done?

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Looting valuables is supposed to be the players job! :decline:

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Just shut up and die you sexy elf bitch.

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We'll see about that

PO_Codexer3.png
I am a Grey Warden

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Ah. You are here to battle the Darkspawn then? Fair enough.

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Should you encounter any merchant caravans, tell them to release my sister or more of their men will die.

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PO_Velanna.png
Consider this a warning.

What a bitch

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We encounter some more bandits along the way.

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Soon, we arrive at the tiny elven camp

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Don't these Dalish elves travel in packs? What's with the tiny camp?

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Oghren was right (for once) Something smells here, and maybe it's Oghren maybe it's Darkspawn...

While exploring, we find a granite deposit. This granite can be used to strengthen the walls of the Vigil
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Soon though, we encounter more trees (what a shock) and some anti-greenpeace folk

After dealing with the enemies, Codexer encounters a man lying underneath a tree (no sex jokes please)
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Who are you?

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Where did the Darkspawn come from?

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The derp roads

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Do you know anything about the elf's sister?

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That's a comforting thought

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Did you kill the elves?

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The Darkspawn are the roots of fucking everything in this game.

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PO_Anders2.png
Do you think she's back at her camp? We could try looking for her there.

Please don't tell me we have to go look for the elven bitch again.

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This disease will kill you, you know.

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As you wish.

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After making an end to a patethic life, some Darkspawn sneak up behind us.

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:roll: Will they ever learn?

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The humans did not kidnap your sister

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Shit

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And we bring you today: A new episode of American loggers, here on Discovery Channel

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Some wolves join the greenpeace demonstration.

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PO_Codexer3.png
Do you really think you can escape from me?

DarthVaderFront.jpg
I have you now!

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PO_Codexer3.png
I just want to talk

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(Laughs) Talk.

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The Darkspawn were playing the humans against the elves.

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The weapons here where planted by Darkspawn

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I'm suprised it took you this long to realise that :smug:

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Let me help

Wait! What! No, Codexer, WTF are you doing?

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She's with the Darkspawn and I need to kill them.

That's more like the Codexer we know.

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Oghren doesn't approve (and neither do I) But we're low on mages and we need the extra firepower

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PO_Codexer3.png
Tunnels, most likely

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We will most likely find the Darkspawn there.

On our wayto the mine, an Ogre rushes towards us
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* * * *
Inside the mine...
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What the...?

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What the shit!

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Codexer is TRIPPING OUT, MAN.

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This doesn't make a lot of sense, I know

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But I still had...

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...Questions (and I wanted to beat the shit out of him)

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Why do we look like someone who drunk a lot of ale?

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I bet it's not that easy

Awakening_0140.jpg

See, she is totally ignoring her sister

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Time for answers
PO_Codexer3.png
WTF is going on here!

Awakening_0143.jpg

Well fuck.

Awakening_0144.jpg


Will our heroes escape the Darkspawn? Will Velanna ever see her sister again. And can I suffer through this expansion without suicidal thoughts?

FIND OUT IN THE NEXT UPDATE OF DRAGON AGE: AWAKENING
 

Brother None

inXile Entertainment
Developer
Joined
Jul 11, 2004
Messages
5,673
A kidnapping case? Beat them up. Investigate a problem with caravans? Beat them up. Convince an elf to join you? Beat them up.

Hurpduderp.
 

DarthBehemoth

Learned
Joined
Oct 4, 2010
Messages
567
Location
Netherlands
Last update, Darkspawn ambushed us and we lost all our goodies

Awakening_0001.jpg


Awakening_0002.jpg

We soon kick some Darkspawn ass with our kung fu

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These notes were written by The Architect (The funny looking dude we met at the end of the last update)

Awakening_0007.jpg

We encounter more and more Darkspawn...

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PO_Oghren2.png
No one touches Oghren's junk and lives!

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It looks like our equipment is worn by these subjects

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We take Oghren's junk for our own and leave him in his stupid clothes.

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PO_Codexer3.png
You are Keenan.

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Shut up and let us help you

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PO_Codexer3.png
What are the Darkspawn doing?

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He already got our stuff. What else could he possibly want from us?

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I smell a stupid side quest!

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Right. Like she'll believe this crap.

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I'd rather bring you to your wife

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That mage in the middle is wearing Velanna's stuff

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Soon, we're surrounded by a shitload of Darkspawn

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We encounter the subject wearing our stuff. But we don't need it so we'll be giving it to Oghren

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We enouncter some reanimated dead (what else is new)

Awakening_0031.jpg

We found the wedding ring stealing Darkspawn motahfucka

Awakening_0032.jpg

Found it.

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We found the Architect's bedroom. Time for some new slippers!

Awakening_0034.jpg

Unfortunately, we only find letters from the Architect

Further into the mine, we encounter this Quinari:
Awakening_0035.jpg


PO_Codexer3.png
Where you captured as well?

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I'll just be on my way

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The chest next to the Quinari contains all our remaining equipment. Time get the fuck outta here

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Shit. It's the Architect

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Cute little fella isn't he?

The Architect decides to unleash two dragons to stop us.
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I almost died.

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PO_Codexer3.png
Your sister is a lost cause.

Just like Bioware is a lost cause

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She is not! She must have her reasons for doing... whatever it is she's doing!

Um. Yes that makes perfect sense

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Pull yourself together! You're no use to anyone like this.

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It's useless. The Darkspawn tunnels are too vast.

Plus I don't want to go the Deep Roads. Not again. Ever

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Letting a crazy elven bitch join the Grey Wardens? HELL NO!

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You don't deserve the honor

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Pray? rejoice you mean!

Anyway let's get outta here!

* * * *
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This is why I don't put my head in a washing machine

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NEXT UPDATE: The blackmarsh!
 

lightbane

Arcane
Joined
Dec 27, 2008
Messages
10,156
Awakening_0010.jpg


Yes, that's an appropiate reaction after playing this shit.

Awakening_0014.jpg


So, how can a human wear dwarven gear and viceversa? Can these armors shrink and grow at will?


Awakening_0042.jpg


:what:
That's a real ugly SOB.
 

DarthBehemoth

Learned
Joined
Oct 4, 2010
Messages
567
Location
Netherlands
Time for another, small update

Awakening_0073.jpg

Looks like things aren't going as planned.

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And have to deal with this shit?

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Fuck them.

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(Persuade) Now more than ever, we stand together...

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Can't believe they fall for Obama style speeches

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(Persuade) I will provide for my people. Trust me.

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Sounds like sending soldier to defend the farms wasn't such a bad idea after all.

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Face it man. YOUR REVOLT JUST GOT FUCKED

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Right. Let's tell the midget we found granite in the wending wood
Awakening_0093.jpg


PO_Codexer3.png
The Wending Wood has some granite

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For fuck's sake. WHY CAN'T ANYTHING BE EASY

PO_Codexer3.png
Fine, you'll have your guards

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I hope so midget, for your safety

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I found an Ore deposit

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Shut up and just for once, make some decent armor

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Bensley also sent us a letter:
Awakening_0104.jpg


And that's it for now folks!
NEXT UPDATE: The Blackmarsh
 

RK47

collides like two planets pulled by gravity
Patron
Joined
Feb 23, 2006
Messages
28,396
Location
Not Here
Dead State Divinity: Original Sin
I couldn't finish this game, there's just too many broken mechanics. It's official, Bioware broke their GOTY Combat Mechanics with expansion.

Thanks for LPing it so I can see the ending.

Also, no option to kill that Qunari double dealer? I mean, c'mon! He traded with EVIL PEEPULZ!
 

DarthBehemoth

Learned
Joined
Oct 4, 2010
Messages
567
Location
Netherlands
It's time to head to the Blackmarsh to look for Kirstoff, our missing Grey Warden

Awakening_0001.jpg


Awakening_0002.jpg

As pretty as a painting

Awakening_0003.jpg

Soon, we get ambushed by some Marsh Wolves

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We soon stumble upon an abandoned village

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And a Darkspawn corpse

PO_Anders2.png
That answers that, I suppose. The Darkspawn are definitely here.

We encounter some Blighted werewolves
Awakening_0009.jpg

But it's no match for Bioware's overpowered weapons

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We find Kirstoff's camp but it looks like he's gone fishing

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We loot some of his stuff because he's probably dead.

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Not the giant woodlouses again... :x

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Kirstoff's dead. Let's go

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IT'S A TRAP!

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If you've come to loot him your outta luck. We'll be taking his goodies.

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Remember, the Mother was that crazy broodmother bitch

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Sounds like this Darkspawn hasn't gone through puberty yet.

PO_Codexer3.png
You wanted me to come? To ambush me, I suppose?

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Shit.

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Ah Christ goddamnit

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This can't be good.

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This is the Fade? How did we get here?
It's FUCKING MAGIC!

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Then help me get back, and we take revenge together!

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Your woodlouses don't stand a chance!

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As this is the Fade, we have to fight shades, demons and all that other shit.

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ITZ MAGIK!

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I could ask you the same question

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You expect me to believe this crap?

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You know this is the Fade, right?

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Undead pop out of nowhere and try to kill us. (What else is new)

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PO_Codexer3.png
(Intimidate) Do you truly think you can defeat me?

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Yes, being trapped in a Bioware game is a terrible nightmare

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Do I look like a helpless soul?

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Okay, okay, calm down. No need to say things we'll regret later.

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he's the man. He's JUSTICE!

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Looks like these folks didn't get a happily ever after.

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I think that since the baroness trapped these people here, that she's our best chance of getting out.

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I will not fight against JUSTICE!

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I would gladly help you.

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Because it's fun to torment old crazy ladies?

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(Persuade) We could defeat her and make her user her magic to help us.

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Hooray

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It's time for JUSTICE!

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Don't try this at home folks.

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She's one crazy bitch

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Their lives are not yours any longer!

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You tell her JUSTICE

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Fuck, it's the talking Darkspawn

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Darkspawn just like to fuck with our quest

PO_Codexer3.png
I figured you'd turn up sooner or later

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HE is more dangerous than you know.
Grammar fail Darkspawn! Grammar fail!

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In order to make this fight easier, kill the wraiths first.

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No! You fool! Why haven't you defeated them?

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Uh-oh

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What the hell just happened? find out in the next update of Dragon Age: Awakening!
 

Radisshu

Prophet
Joined
Jul 16, 2007
Messages
5,623
I fully sympathize.


DAMN this game is ridiculous. Spiritual sequel to BG2 lawlz.
 

Brother None

inXile Entertainment
Developer
Joined
Jul 11, 2004
Messages
5,673
What kind of cheating is Behemoth doing? I'm not sure what you guys are referring to.

Also, can you actually side with the evil chick against SHEPARD JUSTICE there?
 

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